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Thread: The thread for horrible suggestions

  1. #181
    Roma_Victrix's Avatar Call me Ishmael
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    Default Re: The thread for horrible suggestions

    Quote Originally Posted by Rad View Post
    And no "true" Asian factions? Where's my samurai warriors, ninjas and kung fu monks, man?
    Come on!
    If we add the Chinese to the game, it shouldn't even have the ancient Warring States, Qin and Han dynasty armies that existed contemporaneously with ancient Greece and Rome. It should just be the modern-day PLA (People's Liberation Army) of the People's Republic of China. They should come complete with tanks, amphibious assault crafts, submarines, aircraft, cruise missiles and ballistic missiles, etc.



    OMG! THAT LOOKS SO MUCH BETTER THAN THIS, DOESN'T IT?



    As for the Japanese, they didn't even really exist in 272 BC (unless you count their bogus myths that push their line of emperors back into Japanese pre-history and their isolated Bronze Age). Therefore it shouldn't be Samurai, but giant robots! And Toyotas. Gotta have warriors riding in Toyota trucks.

  2. #182

    Default Re: The thread for horrible suggestions

    You guys were so proud to have revised some older units in 2.2 but you couldnt be bothered to add leather arm bands to roman units???

    What is it with this mod for babies?

  3. #183

    Default Re: The thread for horrible suggestions

    Quote Originally Posted by Roma_Victrix View Post

    The guy on the right looks like Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa - better known by his real name, Shang Tsung!
    Last edited by Rad; June 11, 2016 at 03:01 PM.

  4. #184
    Roma_Victrix's Avatar Call me Ishmael
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    Default Re: The thread for horrible suggestions

    Quote Originally Posted by romanius24 View Post
    You guys were so proud to have revised some older units in 2.2 but you couldnt be bothered to add leather arm bands to roman units???

    What is it with this mod for babies?
    Exactly, I mean, what is this? A center for ants???



    Apparently this is a mod for kids who can't read good.

    Quote Originally Posted by Rad View Post
    The guy on the right looks like Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa - better known by his real name, Shang Tsung!
    The guy with the crossbow? Holy crap, you're right! One of these days we'll find a Terracotta Warrior who looks exactly like him too.



    In addition to Shang Tsung, EB II should consider having an "elephant" level unit called "GORO". Just like Sauron in all the Third Age Total War submods, he should be a big, nearly invincible guy walking around the battlefield, smashing everyone's heads in. And breaking Johnny Cage's sunglasses.




  5. #185

    Default Re: The thread for horrible suggestions

    He'd make a great restaurant waiter, that's for sure.

  6. #186
    Roma_Victrix's Avatar Call me Ishmael
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    Default Re: The thread for horrible suggestions

    Quote Originally Posted by Rad View Post
    He'd make a great restaurant waiter, that's for sure.
    He wouldn't be very friendly, but boy could he carry a lot of plates!

  7. #187
    Ngugi's Avatar TATW & Albion Local Mod
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    Default Re: The thread for horrible suggestions

    They must add a katana-unit!
    Cuz the katana is the bestest sword EVER!! If u say else u is a racist! It must be an ELITE unit and it sound swoosch swoosch when they cut, and all die! Warriors can look like a ninja and be all cool and fast and u must make event "Samuraj comes from the shadows. And Asia. And he teach you" and then all generals have katana. Swoosch, swoosch!

    Kingdom of Lindon preview video out





    DCI: Last Alliance
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    Favorite TATW compilation: Withwnars Submod Collection
    Patron of Mank, Kiliç Alì, FireFreak111, MIKEGOLF & Arachir Galudirithon, Earl of Memory

  8. #188

    Default Re: The thread for horrible suggestions

    Quote Originally Posted by Roma_Victrix View Post
    He wouldn't be very friendly, but boy could he carry a lot of plates!
    If he wants any tips, he better be friendly!

    We can't have katanas in the mod, they would cause frequent crashes due to their tremendous power.

  9. #189

    Default Re: The thread for horrible suggestions

    Indeed, recently I tried modding katanas into the game and their perfectly-forged-1000+-times Nippon steel was so effective that the animation graphics alone physically split my monitor in two from their sharpness. After that, all I could hear from the speakers was "DISHONARABU!!!".

    Before my monitor was destroyed though, I did catch my nippon steel users splitting a Hetairoi from head to toe clean through their armor with one swipe--after which my own monitor was split in two by the glorious Nipponese perfection.

    I'm glad I held off modding in the Nodachi.

    Nippon/10 would Dishonor again.

  10. #190
    Ngugi's Avatar TATW & Albion Local Mod
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    Default Re: The thread for horrible suggestions

    Quote Originally Posted by Genghis Skahn View Post
    Indeed, recently I tried modding katanas into the game and their perfectly-forged-1000+-times Nippon steel was so effective that the animation graphics alone physically split my monitor in two from their sharpness. After that, all I could hear from the speakers was "DISHONARABU!!!".

    Before my monitor was destroyed though, I did catch my nippon steel users splitting a Hetairoi from head to toe clean through their armor with one swipe--after which my own monitor was split in two by the glorious Nipponese perfection.

    I'm glad I held off modding in the Nodachi.

    Nippon/10 would Dishonor again.


    least you tried, like a true bushido man thing! My condolences for your monitor. It died for a good cause.
    Last edited by Ngugi; June 12, 2016 at 10:11 AM.

    Kingdom of Lindon preview video out





    DCI: Last Alliance
    - WIP Second Age mod | DCI: Tôl Acharn - mighty Dúnedain Counter Invasions |
    Additional Mercenary Minimod - more mercs; for TATW and DCI | Family Tree minimods - lore improvements | Remade Event Pictures - enhance cultures trough images |
    Favorite TATW compilation: Withwnars Submod Collection
    Patron of Mank, Kiliç Alì, FireFreak111, MIKEGOLF & Arachir Galudirithon, Earl of Memory

  11. #191
    Grimmy's Avatar Ordinarius
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    Default Re: The thread for horrible suggestions

    From the game, we should get 10% GDP of any current nation occupying the geographical area that we conquer. What's the point of conquering if there's no real tribute?

  12. #192

    Default Re: The thread for horrible suggestions

    Quick question:

    Why can i recruit new Family members/Generals?

    I wait very long for Cultural peace. But with the recruiting of generals/civil man i can reduce the Civil Aggresions after the conquer.

    I'm in turn 50 ith riomans and had only captured tarantum and rhegium? wtf???

  13. #193
    Roma_Victrix's Avatar Call me Ishmael
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    Default Re: The thread for horrible suggestions

    Quote Originally Posted by Avarice1987 View Post
    Quick question:

    Why can i recruit new Family members/Generals?

    I wait very long for Cultural peace. But with the recruiting of generals/civil man i can reduce the Civil Aggresions after the conquer.

    I'm in turn 50 ith riomans and had only captured tarantum and rhegium? wtf???
    Excuse me, sir, but READ THE OP, BECAUSE YOU'RE IN THE WRONG NEIGHBORHOOD, HOMEBOY.




  14. #194

    Default Re: The thread for horrible suggestions

    Victrix I have to say that the final pic is so fabulous it made my eyes bleed..
    Perhaps a spoiler tag would be better next time?

  15. #195
    Roma_Victrix's Avatar Call me Ishmael
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    Default Re: The thread for horrible suggestions

    The Carthaginians should remain Punic Phoenician in appearance (i.e. like their modern-day descendants, the Tunisians of North Africa and Lebanese of the Levant), but Hannibal's unit card in the game, and that of his father Hamilcar, should be depicted as sub-Saharan black Africans. Why? BECAUSE...REASONS...THAT'S WHY! WHAT ARE YOU??!! SOME KIND OF RACIST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!





    Or, you know, he most likely looked like a Middle Eastern Semite, like Alexander Siddig (non-black native of Sudan):



    Or this guy:


  16. #196

    Default Re: The thread for horrible suggestions

    I'm still waiting for a "300" like movie about the 2nd Punic War. I expect it to be in 2.3's event scenes, I want to watch it before it hits the cinemas.
    Naturally, there will be a healthy dose of lorica segmentata, skinny girls shooting 150 pound bows, overabundance of blood, a few mutants here and there and LOTS OF SLOW MOTION SCENES.



    :sparta:
    Last edited by Rad; June 15, 2016 at 08:59 AM.

  17. #197
    Grimmy's Avatar Ordinarius
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    Default Re: The thread for horrible suggestions

    Steam obviously existed in the EB2 era. Different peoples had various forms of engines, including engines of war (catapults, scorpions and such like).

    Why come no one has steam engines of war?

  18. #198
    Roma_Victrix's Avatar Call me Ishmael
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    Default Re: The thread for horrible suggestions

    Quote Originally Posted by Grimmy View Post
    Steam obviously existed in the EB2 era. Different peoples had various forms of engines, including engines of war (catapults, scorpions and such like).

    Why come no one has steam engines of war?
    Why stop there? There should be entire units of nothing but steampunk soldiers with handsome top hats, fancy monocles that serve as spyglasses and miniature telescopes, powerful machine arms with grips that can crush plate armor and helmets, and steam-powered handcannons.

    Archimedes would pee his pants if he saw that in action. He'd simply toss his steam cannon design into the waste bin and call it quits.


  19. #199
    Boogie Knight's Avatar Biarchus
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    Default Re: The thread for horrible suggestions

    CA's next game should be Total War: Steampunk.

    ...I shouldn't be posting that here, it's a great idea. Someone get CA on the phone, onward to royaltiiieees!

    *Ahem.*

    I want a time-travelling feature whereby the Romans can be subdued with images of the world to come. Can you imagine? "The British... Empire? Those savages in the mud huts and woad paint? By Jupiter, that can't be right..."

  20. #200
    Roma_Victrix's Avatar Call me Ishmael
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    Default Re: The thread for horrible suggestions

    This mod needs more Batman.

    And the Joker while we're at it!

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