Call me Julian.
Don't call me Shirley
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Daughter, Heir, and Wartime Consigliere of King Athelstan
Sounds to me like you've got a drinking problem.
Look, I'm not the first guy to fall in love with a girl he met in a restaurant who then turned out to be the daughter of a kidnapped scientist only to lose her to a childhood lover whom she'd last scene on a deserted island and who eventually turned up 15 years later as the leader of the French Underground.
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Daughter, Heir, and Wartime Consigliere of King Athelstan
I hate how relateable that is
Proudly under the patronage of General Brewster of the Imperial House of Hader
Proud patron of 4zumi, Akar, CommodusIV ,Swaeft and Peaman
It's quite a tragic life story
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Daughter, Heir, and Wartime Consigliere of King Athelstan
Don't feel bad, it could happen to anyone, really! A very common situation that lovers find themselves in, like when I dated a paraplegic Lithuanian female folk singer who turned out to be a secret agent for the Russian Federation and an ethnic Russian who was just using me for access to a worker's visa and permanent residency so she could infiltrate homeland security and commit espionage by stealing and trading state secrets while hooking back up with her long lost Cuban lover Martín before absconding, clearing out my bank account, and fleeing under disguise to Papua New Guinea with their stolen assets.
Wait, Martin or Martín? Because I'm dating a Martin right now and you better stay away from my beautiful cubano lover
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Daughter, Heir, and Wartime Consigliere of King Athelstan
Under the patronage of Finlander, patron of Lugotorix & Lifthrasir & joerock22 & Socrates1984 & Kilo11 & Vladyvid & Dick Cheney & phazer & Jake Armitage & webba 84 of the Imperial House of Hader
Go ahead and keep your Cuban lover, but if he has anything to do with the woman who just left me then I'll have to intervene and lay the smack down.
There's only one Cuban worth talking about and her name is Ana de Armas:
It's okay buddy. It's something that plagues a lot of people, being unable to pour the drink into your mouth and splashing it all over your face instead. A very serious problem.
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Daughter, Heir, and Wartime Consigliere of King Athelstan