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Thread: Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros is the best looking unit in the game, and you're not allowed to disagree in this thread. That's right. I said NO.

  1. #1
    Roma_Victrix's Avatar Gatorade, is it in you?
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    Default Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros is the best looking unit in the game, and you're not allowed to disagree in this thread. That's right. I said NO.

    Greetings everybody! And welcome to the thread where NO! I SAID NO!

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    "But Roma Victrix, can I even talk about how cool the Hypaspistai and the Makedones Peltastai look for Epeiros?"

    NO!

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    "Surely you'd agree that Molosson Agema cavalry and bodyguard for Epeiros are at least comparable and that..."

    NO!

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    "Well then, what's the point of arguing with you? I don't see how this..."

    NO!

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    "Uh, okay. Am I even allowed to leave the thread and stop worshiping Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros?"

    NO!

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    In case it wasn't clear to you the first time: NO! This is the TWC official thread where we talk about Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros exclusively, filtering out all other content to be vaporized as unworthy unorthodox filth! We are to discuss at length the interesting shield patterns displayed by the Agema Phalangitai as they are used by Epeiros, and no other faction! Any illicit discussion and truly foul and perverse barbaric speech about Agema Phalangitai for other factions will be VAPORIZED! And you will be told NO!

    Just look at the amazing work done on the shields here, with the eagle and thunderbolt, the head of Athena, the laurel wreaths and golden wreaths, the different colors and patterns that fit amazingly with the unit, which is gorgeous all by itself. So help me god if you talk about anything else I will NO! I SAID NO!


  2. #2
    isa0005's Avatar Content Staff
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    Default Re: Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros is the best looking unit in the game, and you're not allowed to disagree in this thread. That's right. I said NO.

    YES!
    Last edited by isa0005; May 19, 2019 at 07:38 PM.

  3. #3
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    Default Re: Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros is the best looking unit in the game, and you're not allowed to disagree in this thread. That's right. I said NO.

    But what about *evaporates*

  4. #4
    Roma_Victrix's Avatar Gatorade, is it in you?
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    Default Re: Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros is the best looking unit in the game, and you're not allowed to disagree in this thread. That's right. I said NO.

    Quote Originally Posted by isa0005 View Post
    YES!
    The actor Alan Rickman (RIP) tried to talk about Thorakitai Epilektoi for Epeiros instead, and look where that got him.

    NO!



    Quote Originally Posted by Dooz View Post
    But what about *evaporates*
    That's right! Another one bites the dust. Anyone else want to talk about something other than Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros exclusively? NO? Good. Then let us proceed to discuss how the eagle and thunderbolt design, shared by the Ptolemies (who we shall never discuss otherwise in this thread), is truly epic and deserving of rep for whoever made it. Our gracious EBII overlords, skinners, and modelers deserve their praise in this department.

  5. #5

    Default Re: Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros is the best looking unit in the game, and you're not allowed to disagree in this thread. That's right. I said NO.

    Epeiros Hypaspistai has it for me. But aye, overall, Epeiros' units are so good looking.
    Then, as throngs of his enemies bore down upon him and one of his followers said, "They are making at thee, O King," "Who else, pray," said Antigonus, "should be their mark? But Demetrius will come to my aid." This was his hope to the last, and to the last he kept watching eagerly for his son; then a whole cloud of javelins were let fly at him and he fell.

    -Plutarch, life of Demetrius.

    Arche Aiakidae-Epeiros EB2 AAR

  6. #6
    QuintusSertorius's Avatar EBII Hod Carrier
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    Default Re: Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros is the best looking unit in the game, and you're not allowed to disagree in this thread. That's right. I said NO.

    I have some bad news for 2.4 - Epeiros is going to get a reworking of their governments, and you won't have access to them from the start. They'll require a (faction-specific) reform.

  7. #7

    Default Re: Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros is the best looking unit in the game, and you're not allowed to disagree in this thread. That's right. I said NO.

    What in the Nine Hells?! That is one seriously good-looking unit. Where have you been all my campaign? It is tragic on some level that a person should play with all kinds of mediocre-looking units and not get to try out Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros. It's like discovering on your death bed that there is, and has been all your life, a thing called pizza. I am not suggesting that pizza is quite as delicious as Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros is awesome-looking, but you get the point.

    I was thinking of upgrading to 2.4 for my next campaign, but if that means forfeiting my subjective right to employ Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros, I say to hell with it.

  8. #8
    QuintusSertorius's Avatar EBII Hod Carrier
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    Default Re: Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros is the best looking unit in the game, and you're not allowed to disagree in this thread. That's right. I said NO.

    You won't be seeing 2.4 for a while, the patch is 2.35A, where Epeiros will be unchanged for now. It's too big a change to bundle in with the things being readied for a release.

  9. #9
    Roma_Victrix's Avatar Gatorade, is it in you?
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    Default Re: Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros is the best looking unit in the game, and you're not allowed to disagree in this thread. That's right. I said NO.

    Quote Originally Posted by Wulfburk View Post
    Epeiros Hypaspistai has it for me. But aye, overall, Epeiros' units are so good looking.


    The Hypaspistai for each faction look great but for some reason they look amazing for Epeiros. Those shield patterns, those flashy colors, they're all so...wait a minute. This thread is about Agema Phalangitai only! You tricked me! NO! I SAID NO!

    NO!



    Quote Originally Posted by QuintusSertorius View Post
    I have some bad news for 2.4 - Epeiros is going to get a reworking of their governments, and you won't have access to them from the start. They'll require a (faction-specific) reform.
    So you're telling me in future iterations I have to wait like 100 turns just to obtain my glorious Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros? You know exactly what I'm going to say about that, Quintus. I think you already know it, deep down in your heart of hearts:

    NO!



    Quote Originally Posted by Septentrionalis View Post
    What in the Nine Hells?! That is one seriously good-looking unit. Where have you been all my campaign? It is tragic on some level that a person should play with all kinds of mediocre-looking units and not get to try out Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros. It's like discovering on your death bed that there is, and has been all your life, a thing called pizza. I am not suggesting that pizza is quite as delicious as Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros is awesome-looking, but you get the point.

    I was thinking of upgrading to 2.4 for my next campaign, but if that means forfeiting my subjective right to employ Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros, I say to hell with it.
    FINALLY! Someone gets it! You said it better than I ever could. Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros is something truly fundamental, like having pizza in your life, if not oxygen. You just simply can't go without it. It's like you've never lived until you've either fought Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros, or better yet, played as Epeiros in order to recruit them and see them in battle.

  10. #10

    Default Re: Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros is the best looking unit in the game, and you're not allowed to disagree in this thread. That's right. I said NO.

    daily reminder to take your pills folks.

  11. #11

    Default Re: Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros is the best looking unit in the game, and you're not allowed to disagree in this thread. That's right. I said NO.

    Haven't played Epeiros yet (Makedonia Great Again), but how did you get those Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros to march/line up so well in what looks like a narrow street on a city map in the third screenshot? That must've taken quite a bit of finangling to get such a good screenshot.

  12. #12

    Default Re: Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros is the best looking unit in the game, and you're not allowed to disagree in this thread. That's right. I said NO.

    Quote Originally Posted by Dargaron View Post
    Haven't played Epeiros yet (Makedonia Great Again), but how did you get those Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros to march/line up so well in what looks like a narrow street on a city map in the third screenshot? That must've taken quite a bit of finangling to get such a good screenshot.
    Are you saying that Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros, once again victorious, have some kind of trouble looking amazing while proudly marching along a narrow street? Surely I hope that I misunderstand you.

  13. #13
    Lusitanio's Avatar Content Staff
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    Default Re: Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros is the best looking unit in the game, and you're not allowed to disagree in this thread. That's right. I said NO.

    Quote Originally Posted by sarpedon21 View Post
    daily reminder to take your pills folks.

  14. #14
    Roma_Victrix's Avatar Gatorade, is it in you?
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    Default Re: Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros is the best looking unit in the game, and you're not allowed to disagree in this thread. That's right. I said NO.

    Quote Originally Posted by sarpedon21 View Post
    daily reminder to take your pills folks.


    Pills have NOTHING to do with Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros, so you have therefore been VAPORIZED. You should have listened while you still had the chance, when I said NO.

    NO!



    Quote Originally Posted by Dargaron View Post
    Haven't played Epeiros yet (Makedonia Great Again), but how did you get those Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros to march/line up so well in what looks like a narrow street on a city map in the third screenshot? That must've taken quite a bit of finangling to get such a good screenshot.
    Quote Originally Posted by Septentrionalis View Post
    Are you saying that Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros, once again victorious, have some kind of trouble looking amazing while proudly marching along a narrow street? Surely I hope that I misunderstand you.
    Agema Phalangitai and other phalangitai phalanx pike units in general (but all of which shall go unnamed) sometimes change formation when you order them to move forward even during field battles, let alone sieges where they have to walk down narrow streets and hence walk in a more narrow column. They are adapting to their environment because they not only look superior, they ARE superior, the best unit in the game by leaps and bounds. Long may they reign!

    Quote Originally Posted by Lusitanio View Post
    You brought popcorn and you're NOT SHARING ANY? Not even with my Agema Phalangitai?

    NO!


  15. #15

    Default Re: Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros is the best looking unit in the game, and you're not allowed to disagree in this thread. That's right. I said NO.

    The epirotes? Someone fetch me my fainting couch!

    It is the pontic agema who represents the epitome of fashion.

    You should feel bad for gushing over those barbarian dog-lovers, how pedestrian!

  16. #16
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    Default Re: Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros is the best looking unit in the game, and you're not allowed to disagree in this thread. That's right. I said NO.

    Quote Originally Posted by Hellenikon View Post
    The epirotes? Someone fetch me my fainting couch!

    It is the pontic agema who represents the epitome of fashion.

    You should feel bad for gushing over those barbarian dog-lovers, how pedestrian!
    *a vague and distant sound can be heard in the wind*

    omg what have you done...

  17. #17
    Roma_Victrix's Avatar Gatorade, is it in you?
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    Default Re: Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros is the best looking unit in the game, and you're not allowed to disagree in this thread. That's right. I said NO.

    Quote Originally Posted by Hellenikon View Post
    The epirotes? Someone fetch me my fainting couch!

    It is the pontic agema who represents the epitome of fashion.

    You should feel bad for gushing over those barbarian dog-lovers, how pedestrian!
    The Kingdom of Pontus is Persian, they're not even real Greeks! The Epirotes at least spoke northwestern Doric Greek, had Greek names, and Greek gods! I don't even care if we're still talking about Agema Phalangitai, you're introducing talk of other factions. HERESY! You DARE to mention something besides Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros???!!! Congratulations. I hope you're happy, because I've reanimated Pyrrhos of Epeiros and he is not happy about this. In fact, I gave him directions to your location. He should be arriving momentarily and there will be no mercy.



    Quote Originally Posted by Dooz View Post
    *a vague and distant sound can be heard in the wind*

    omg what have you done...
    The vaporizing continues.

  18. #18

    Default Re: Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros is the best looking unit in the game, and you're not allowed to disagree in this thread. That's right. I said NO.

    I for one welcome our new Agema Phalangitai overlords

  19. #19

    Default Re: Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros is the best looking unit in the game, and you're not allowed to disagree in this thread. That's right. I said NO.

    Quote Originally Posted by QuintusSertorius View Post
    You won't be seeing 2.4 for a while, the patch is 2.35A, where Epeiros will be unchanged for now. It's too big a change to bundle in with the things being readied for a release.
    Thank you for the reminder and the heads up about 2.4 not having them from the start. 2.35 it is then, obviously, if Agema Phalangitai is still available.

    As for the planned legislative changes in future releases, we were left with no other alternative than to form a new advocacy group called the "National Agema Phalangitai Association of Epeiros" (NAPAE). It will serve as a civil rights group lobbying for the rights of law-abiding individuals to own Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros units and to deploy them on the battlefield. It will also organize Agema Phalangitai events, promote Agema Phalangitai safety and provide Agema Phalangitai education. Roma_Victrix will serve as the first chairman.

    We are now planning our first campaign, the motto of which is provocatively "Secure the right to own Agema Phalangitai - the next War of Independence will not be fought with mediocre-looking units". All citizens of the EBII Forum who truly understand the difference between a regular sucky unit and an awesome-looking superior unit are welcome to participate.

  20. #20

    Default Re: Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros is the best looking unit in the game, and you're not allowed to disagree in this thread. That's right. I said NO.

    Quote Originally Posted by Septentrionalis View Post
    Thank you for the reminder and the heads up about 2.4 not having them from the start. 2.35 it is then, obviously, if Agema Phalangitai is still available.

    As for the planned legislative changes in future releases, we were left with no other alternative than to form a new advocacy group called the "National Agema Phalangitai Association of Epeiros" (NAPAE). It will serve as a civil rights group lobbying for the rights of law-abiding individuals to own Agema Phalangitai for Epeiros units and to deploy them on the battlefield. It will also organize Agema Phalangitai events, promote Agema Phalangitai safety and provide Agema Phalangitai education. Roma_Victrix will serve as the first chairman.

    We are now planning our first campaign, the motto of which is provocatively "Secure the right to own Agema Phalangitai - the next War of Independence will not be fought with mediocre-looking units". All citizens of the EBII Forum who truly understand the difference between a regular sucky unit and an awesome-looking superior unit are welcome to participate.
    I'm in.

    AGEMA! AGEMA! AGEMA!
    I recommend a pugio rather than a spear, because in close quarters combat, a dagger will serve you better than a spear.

    Rad, 2016.

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