Eats, shoots, and leaves.
-----------------
A man in a hot air balloon gets lost in the mist. When he finally spots someone on the ground he goes down a bit and calls out:
"Hello, do you know where I am? I promised to be home for dinner."
After a long silence the man on the ground replies, "You're in the nacelle of a hot air balloon, about 20 meters above the ground."
The man in the balloon answers, somewhat irritated: "You must be a mathematician."
"How did you know?"
"Well, you thought very long before replying, your answer was absolutely correct and totally unhelpful. Thanks to you I'm going to miss dinner now."
"So you must be a manager."
"How did you know?"
"You don't know where you are or where you should be going, you got to your position with the help of a lot of hot air, you're asking other people to solve your problems and then say it's their fault if things don't work."
Last edited by Iskar; July 18, 2017 at 04:49 PM.
"Non i titoli illustrano gli uomini, ma gli uomini i titoli." - Niccolo Machiavelli, Discorsi
"Du musst die Sterne und den Mond enthaupten, und am besten auch den Zar. Die Gestirne werden sich behaupten, aber wahrscheinlich nicht der Zar." - Einstürzende Neubauten, Weil, Weil, Weil
On an eternal crusade for reason, logics, catholicism and chocolate. Mostly chocolate, though.
I can heartily recommend the Italian Wars mod by Aneirin.
In exile, but still under the patronage of the impeccable Aikanár, alongside Aneirin. Humble patron of Cyclops, Frunk and Abdülmecid I.
I just hate it when my cover gets blown.
Top 10 anime fights
Spoiler Alert, click show to read:
What's that second to last one? Someone made a parody series of that and there's one where Yugi from Yu-gi-oh duels the guy, it's funny as crap.
It is just an edited picture where they put Spongebob instead of Goku. In the one above that they replaced Chiaotzu with Spongebob.
Spongebob vs Cell would be amazing because both can regenerate. Though Spongebob would lose eventually because he needs water or else he becomes dry and crispy and probably brittle.
Yeah I saw the Yugi vs Cell video, I didn't know that Pharaoh and Cell had so much in common. Yusuke Urameshi vs Cell and Kenshiro vs Cell were also pretty damn funny.
Game of Drones
Game of Bones
Eats, shoots, and leaves.
Captured from Reddit, in the subreddit TIL (Today I Learned)
Things I trust more than American conservatives:
Drinks from Bill Cosby, Flint Michigan tap water, Plane rides from Al Qaeda, Anything on the menu at Chipotle, Medical procedures from Mengele
Being a minor, you can't sign contracts.
Eats, shoots, and leaves.
some more random stuff
Now I see the truth!
Spoiler Alert, click show to read:
Yes, please do it!!
Spoiler Alert, click show to read:
Double surprise
Spoiler Alert, click show to read:
Kameeeeehameeeehaaaa!
Spoiler Alert, click show to read:
This is ...
Spoiler Alert, click show to read:
No words are needed ..
Spoiler Alert, click show to read:
jeek, I was forgetting this masterpiece
You don't mess with the Potter!
Spoiler Alert, click show to read:
Last edited by Flinn; July 21, 2017 at 07:43 AM.
Under the patronage of Finlander, patron of Lugotorix & Lifthrasir & joerock22 & Socrates1984 & Kilo11 & Vladyvid & Dick Cheney & phazer & Jake Armitage & webba 84 of the Imperial House of Hader
In all seriousness, Daniel Radcliffe did stop a mugging the other day.
Eats, shoots, and leaves.
So the rover passed out and had a dream shortly before it died?
The Little Mars Stuck Gurney by Hans Christian Androidsen.
Eats, shoots, and leaves.
Mars doesn't have matches, it froze to death.
There were three POWs together in a British prison in the Second World War, a German, a Japanese, and an Italian.
The British began by torturing the German. After long hours of silence infected by bloodcurdling screams, he talked, and was sent back to the prison, ashamed. He told the others what he had done and urged them to be stronger than he was.
They next began torturing the Japanese man. Through all the pain and agony, he stayed strong for three days, but in the end, talked. He was sent back to the prison, having brought shame to himself, his family, and his country.
They finally sent in the Italian. For an unending three weeks, they tortured him, until they realized if they did anything else to the poor man, he would die, so they sent him back. When he got back to the prison cell bloody and battered, the other POWs asked him, "So? Did you talk?"
"How could I talk with my hands tied behind my back?"
Spoiler Alert, click show to read: