Oh yes, playing Antigonidai has always been tough. It's even challenging in the normal DeI version and DV takes it up another notch! You need to really think through each step early game, since you can end up defeated otherwise. Factions with high cultural aversions to others (Antigonidai, Pontus, Lustitanii, Barcids etc) have it extra tough early on.
Like you've mentioned in your post, I've also taken terrible losses or ended up in a tough spot because I didn't notice the AI flanking me at one location or two when there's these many units involved 
. I've also had my other gates sneak-burned when I've been occupied on one side. Luckily the towers are a bit more dangerous in DV than in normal DeI so they can do their fair share of damage on the AI (or you) if enemies stick around too long.
My suggestion is to rush Aetolian League or Triballii if you aren't planning to have good relations with any of them. In my own test-game I rushed the Aetolian League on turn two, just trained three bronze shields so I had four and got some mercs in Hellas on the way. You should be able to defeat their crappy starting garrison and the few units they have.
If you start a war with Epirus, Romans will like you once they capture Taras (they usually do) and you'll be able to sign trade etc with them and have a safe flank (the illyrians are still a wildcard though). Other than that, you'll be fighting spartans/athenians and possibly either Triballi or Tolstibogiii. I've managed to get good relations/trade with Thyni/Bithynia. If you focus on Greece, boost your garrison in Pella a bit to hold back thracian/celtic hordes!
And now for a small preview for todays hotfix...
Re: [Submod] Data Venia - Overhaul (for DeI 1.2 - RELEASED!)
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