Trans teen leaves a heartbreaking final note on Tumblr Before Killing Herself

[Slydessertfox]

This is, quite frankly, just sickening. It's people like this girl's parents that really ing piss me off because they have blood on their hands when the result is the person killing themselves. It just adds insult to injury that they had the audacity to continue to refer to her as a boy in their "tribute" to her and refuse to acknowledge her being transgender. Then of course there's the fact that nobody seemed to give a about her until she committed suicide. FFS, society really pisses me off sometimes.

Trans teen leaves a heartbreaking final note on Tumblr

Leelah Alcorn's three-year struggle to assert her transgender identity in a staunchly Christian household came to an end Sunday, when she was struck and killed by oncoming traffic on I-71 near Cincinnati.
Before she died, the 17-year-old left a heartbreaking note on Tumblr detailing the depression and increasing hopelessness she had experienced since attempting to come out to her parents after first learning the word "transgender" at the age of 14. Though she wrote that she initially "cried of happiness" when learning there was a name for the gender dysphoria she had felt her whole life, her joy was short-lived:

I immediately told my mom, and she reacted extremely negatively, telling me that it was a phase, that I would never truly be a girl, that God doesn’t make mistakes, that I am wrong. If you are reading this, parents, please don’t tell this to your kids. Even if you are Christian or are against transgender people don’t ever say that to someone, especially your kid. That won’t do anything but make them hate them self. That’s exactly what it did to me.

After three years of dealing with the toll her parents' reaction took, Alcorn wrote that "The life I would’ve lived isn’t worth living in… because I’m transgender."
Shortly after leaving this note on her Tumblr, along with a final series of goodbyes to friends and family, Alcorn reportedly walked into traffic on the interstate early Sunday morning. She was struck and killed by an oncoming semi-trailer.
Despite Alcorn's stated reason for her tragic decision, her parents prepared an obituary that described her as a "loving son." Though a photo that misrepresents her as a boy has since been removed from the website of the last public school she attended, screencaptures of it are circulating the Internet.


Though Alcorn's Tumblr reveals evidence of suicidal ideation ("i want to fade away without ruining everyone else’s plans" she wrote at one point), it also paints a portrait of a fun, warm-hearted artist who occasionally drew fanart, who loved Sailor Moon and other magical-girl anime series, and who longed to live in a more tolerant world. When one of her followers sent her a message calling her an inspiration, she responded with typical self-deprecation:

awwhhh! I don’t know what’s so inspiring about a gross tranny who has a weirdly proportioned body and sucks at make-up, but thank you, I wish you the best of luck ✿♥✿ (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧✿♥✿

This wasn't false modesty. Alcorn's final note speaks of having her self-esteem decimated over the years as a result of parental rejection, harmful anti-therapy, and enforced isolation:

My mom started taking me to a therapist, but would only take me to christian therapists, (who were all very biased) so I never actually got the therapy I needed to cure me of my depression. I only got more christians telling me that I was selfish and wrong and that I should look to God for help.

When I was 16 I realized that my parents would never come around, and that I would have to wait until I was 18 to start any sort of transitioning treatment, which absolutely broke my heart. The longer you wait, the harder it is to transition. I felt hopeless, that I was just going to look like a man in drag for the rest of my life. On my 16th birthday, when I didn’t receive consent from my parents to start transitioning, I cried myself to sleep.

I formed a sort of a “ you” attitude towards my parents and came out as gay at school, thinking that maybe if I eased into coming out as trans it would be less of a shock. Although the reaction from my friends was positive, my parents were pissed. They felt like I was attacking their image, and that I was an embarrassment to them. They wanted me to be their perfect little straight christian boy, and that’s obviously not what I wanted.

Alcorn wrote that her parents pulled her from public school and confiscated access to the Internet and social media, leaving her essentially stranded, with no way to contact her friends for about five months. After this period of isolation ended, Alcorn wrote that she could no longer convince herself that her friendships were real.
Alcorn's description of her life is not extraordinary, but rather a typical example of what millions of transgender teens face around the world. Rather than continue to deal with familial and societal rejection, Alcorn joined the staggeringly high number of trans teens who take their own lives annually. A January report from the National Transgender Discrimination Survey found that 45 percent of genderqueer adults ages 18–24 had attempted suicide; a November study in Britain found that 48 percent of trans adults age 26 and under had attempted suicide. Overall, the transgender suicide attempt rate is more than 26times higher than that of the general population. Bullying and societal rejection, along with physical violence and legal discrimination, are all frequently cited as reasons for attempts.
Alcorn was adamant that her story and testimony should be added to the public record of trans suicides.
On Facebook, gay Cincinnati city councilman Chris Seelbach wrote of Alcorn's death, "it is still extremely difficult to be a transgender young person in this country. We have to do better."
On Tumblr, a post by user mememas memorializing Alcorn went viral Tuesday morning, garnering over 25,000 notes in a matter of hours as Tumblr users reacted to the tragedy. On Twitter, users were critical of Alcorn's parents.


A screencap of Alcorn's mother discussing her daughter's death on Facebook also made the rounds, attracting scorn from users. In the screencap, Alcorn's mother reportedly describes the incident as a tragic "walk" gone wrong—and continues to misgender Leelah by referring to her as her son.



While supporters on Tumblr and Twitter urged tolerance and expressed outrage at the actions of Alcorn's parents, it's Leelah herself who might have had the last word—in an image she posted to Tumblr shortly before her death: lazerprincess/Tumblr


The image depicts the trans flag in the form of fairy wings, and a clueless set of parents trying to shear them off.

At press time, Tumblr users were reblogging it with a note simply reading: "Remember Leelah."

[Aanker]

The background story is - no doubt - sad, but I really do not think this type of suicide should be glorified (which it *sort of* is by highlighting the compassion of the community response, etc.). What about the driver of the aforementioned truck? What about the parents themsences?

[Dr Zoidberg]

What about the parents themsences?

What about the parents?

[Slydessertfox]

The background story is - no doubt - sad, but I really do not think this type of suicide should be glorified (which it *sort of* is by highlighting the compassion of the community response, etc.).

I don't think it's being glorified. You have an immense outpouring of sympathy and sadness for what she had to go through and her suicide, but I don't see any glorifying of it.

What about the parents themsences?

I have 0 sympathy for people who ostracize and drive their children to suicide.

[chilon]

The background story is - no doubt - sad, but I really do not think this type of suicide should be glorified (which it *sort of* is by highlighting the compassion of the community response, etc.). What about the driver of the aforementioned truck? What about the parents themsences?

WTF?

It has nothing to fecking to do with "glorifying". The point is the fecking tragic circumstances that created this event.

Who gives a flying feck about the parents. It looks like primarily their fecking fault. They were absolutely shite parents.

And TBH the truck driver is irrelevant. No one driving a car innocently that has someone jump in front is guilty in any way. There is nothing that person could have done.

Your post seems very cold and callous to not even recognize that a human took their life that didn't have to die.

[Kyriakos]

The background story is - no doubt - sad, but I really do not think this type of suicide should be glorified (which it *sort of* is by highlighting the compassion of the community response, etc.). What about the driver of the aforementioned truck? What about the parents themsences?

Entirely agree.

Surely someone trying to live as a transgender is not likely to have a decent life. That said, this is one of a vast number of tragedies. Pretty sure that endless millions of people currently live in hell despite not having to deal with gender issues either, so that is again putting things in perspective...

RIP. But this story likely will do more harm in the end.

[Papay]

When you commit suicide the problem is in your head

[Dr Zoidberg]

When you commit suicide the problem is in your head

The poor kid had an issue, not a problem. The real problem was that her immediate support network - the people she trusted the most and wanted help from - refused to acknowledge her issue and to help her work her way through it.

Gender Dysphoria is a genuine issue and her parents, due to their sheer ignorance and adherence to a fairy tale, undoubtedly directly contributed to their child feeling the only way out was suicide.

I'm not sure if you can play it where you are (if not, the transcript is available), but Australia's leading Investigative Journalism program - 4 Corners - only a month or so back did a piece on gender dysphoria in children. It was very informative and moving. I highly recommend you watching it.

http://www.abc.net.au/4corners/stori...17/4127631.htm

There are any number of self help books that will tell you how to find yourself.

But what if truly being yourself involved changing your gender? Would you have the courage to do it?

Eleven-year-old Isabelle does. To the world she looked like a young boy. But she knew that she was really a girl, and a year ago she told her parents the way she felt.

This week Four Corners reporter Janine Cohen tells Isabelle's story and the story of the family, the doctor and ultimately the community that backed her decision to truly be herself.

Along the way we meet other people who've confronted the same feelings and discover that a growing and significant number of children are finding themselves in the same situation. Some find support from their parents and doctors. Others discover fear, prejudice and a legal system that doesn't make it easy for them to be themselves.

For Isabelle, the decision to tell her story was not made lightly. She and her parents tell Four Corners that they are willing to speak about their experience so that others won't feel alone and other transgender children can be helped and protected.

Doctors tell the program that trying to repress the feeling that you are trapped in the wrong body simply does not work. Instead, it can lead to self harm and even suicide.

Paediatricians also make it clear that timing is important. They explain that if children want to make a physical change, then treatment should begin at puberty. In that way, hormone treatments can be prescribed with far better results.

[Slydessertfox]

When you commit suicide the problem is in your head

I'm impressed. It took only 3 posts before we had our first victim blaming.

[the_mango55]

I'm impressed. It took only 3 posts before we had our first victim blaming.

That's not victim blaming. Victim blaming is blaming the person victimized for the victimization itself. Like blaiming a rape victim for being raped because of their clothes, or in this case blaming the child for being ostracized by their parents.

Blaming someone who killed themselves on being crazy is insensitive and usually offensive, but not victim blaming.

[Gaidin]

I like the way Papay skipped straight to the end and never asked why.

[Costin_Razvan]

How is this a political issue exactly?

Anyway, some utter idiot decided to kill themselves after dealing with parental issues and in doing so screwed over some poor driver who will be scared for life.

Good riddance you bloody .

[Gaidin]

How is this a political issue exactly?

Anyway, some utter idiot decided to kill themselves after dealing with parental issues and in doing so screwed over some poor driver who will be scared for life.

Good riddance you bloody .

Are you aware of how much of a hot issue LGBT is in America right now? You know nothing. About neither the subject nor the location. So like Papay you jump to the end without even reading the story. Bravo. Golf clap for you!

[Slydessertfox]

"An idiot commits suicide"

Yes, how dare she want to be her natural gender. She's an idiot for not suffering through more trans conversion therapy and from suffering from complete rejection by her parents and peers. There is only so much pressure people can take. I remember now why I left total war center for awhile.

[Slydessertfox]

Good riddance you bloody .

Look at me, I'm so edgy.

[Dr Zoidberg]

Nine posts for the second victim blaming. We're such a lovely bunch of people here at TWC.

[Sir Adrian]

Nine posts for the second victim blaming. We're such a lovely bunch of people here at TWC.

The girl had clear mental issues in the form of severe depression and other ailments and Instead of seeking help she chose to make it a big circus because all. This whole thing wouldn't have happened if people stopped victimizing teen suicides post factum and actually gave them the help they need before they kill themselves. Posts like your are not only not helping anyone but are part of the problem.


@Giadin: People's suicides are not political issues. The fact that you are trying to use her sexual orientation in order to make it a political issue is quite disgusting.

[Takizama]

@Giadin: People's suicides are not political issues. The fact that you are trying to use her sexual orientation in order to make it a political issue is quite disgusting.

The things that lead people to that suicide might be political.

[Garbarsardar]

The girl had clear mental issues in the form of severe depression and other ailments and Instead of seeking help she chose to make it a big circus because all. This whole thing wouldn't have happened if people stopped victimizing teen suicides post factum and actually gave them the help they need before they kill themselves. Posts like your are not only not helping anyone but are part of the problem.

This probably qualifies as the most idiotic statement I have read on this site in the past 10 years. Did you seriously just argued that people that commit suicide do so because they chose not to seek help? Are you even remotely aware of how depression works? Can you conceive that a person that contemplates suicide feels that he/she has exhausted all other possible alternatives? And how on earth will they get the "help they need" if there are people like you that consider that not getting help is a choice, because, as you so eloquently put it, " all"?

@Giadin: People's suicides are not political issues. The fact that you are trying to use her sexual orientation in order to make it a political issue is quite disgusting.

OH REALLY?

So the wave of suicides that follows financial troubles as in the 1929 or recently the Greek depression is because of what? Funny weather? The fact that North Korea has currently the highest rate in the world is due to, what? Bad haircuts?

FFS.

[Sir Adrian]

This probably qualifies as the most idiotic statement I have read on this site in the past 10 years. Did you seriously just argued that people that commit suicide do so because they chose not to seek help? Are you even remotely aware of how depression works? Can you conceive that a person that contemplates suicide feels that he/she has exhausted all other possible alternatives? And how on earth will they get the "help they need" if there are people like you that consider that not getting help is a choice, because, as you so eloquently put it, " all"?

No, I said SHE did not seek help, singular 3rd person feminine. I do know how depression works, I've suffered from it (granted it was mild), I've had friends suffer from it and I've seen people go suicidal right in front of me for reasons far more serious than this so please don't lecture me on this because you are preaching to the choir.

Yes, seeking help is not generally not a choice, sadly, but in this particular case she did have the option of looking to others for help all the way to the very last second. It would have been enough to speak to a bloody school psychologist to set her on a different track. For one her parent's abuses would have been reported to the relevant authorities and she would have found herself into a more accepting. Not all people commit suicide exhaust all alternatives or even attempt to look for one, you should know this.

Call me a dick, insensitive, an idiot, the spawn of Hitler and Skeletor, I don't care. As far as I'm concerned this individual case is another Amanda Todd case and crying her eulogy will not solve anything but instead only encourage the next troubled teen to take their life.

So the wave of suicides that follows financial troubles as in the 1929 or recently the Greek depression is because of what? Funny weather? The fact that North Korea has currently the highest rate in the world is due to, what? Bad haircuts?

FFS.

They were the result of political issues (among other factors), not the issue itself.

Incidentally though at least part of the suicides in North Korea are due to bad haircuts, Dear leader's bad haircut specifically which is now mandatory for young males. But that is besides the point.