Corrupt a Wish

[Magister Militum Flavius Aetius]

Granted, you become their new Queen and they all attempt to reproduce with you.

I wish for a 3D modeller for my mod team.

[Discord1996]

Granted, but his skills are very poor so you have made no process with your mod and you have to find a new one again.
I wish i had a lotus elise

[chesser2538]

Granted but it's a Hot Wheel.

I wish for a new copy of Europa Universalis 4.

[Cyrene]

Granted, but eventually you find out it's pirated. no mods = no play


I wish the World would return to fight with swords and horses, this type of warfare is more fair.

[Spear Dog]

Granted, and your charging into battle in gleaming armour, lance levelled when you realise you didn't ban guns! The enemy shoot the crap out of you.

I wish to be worshipped with sacrifices.

[General Maximus]

Granted, the people sacrifice yourself for your own worship by throwing you into a pool of lava alive, and then proceed to proclaim that 'His Holiness the Spear Dog' has gone 'back into the realm of heaven where he should be reigning'.

I wish to fight and defeat a thief who would break into my house, and be a hero of the newspapers tomorrow.

[Satrio Eko]

Granted, but after the friends of the thief saw you on the newspaper they come to ur house & beat you till die

I wish Indonesia have a good internet speed

[Librarian]

Granted, but the Servers heat up so much that Indonesia is wiped of the map by the Nuclear Reactor built to supply the internet


I wish I am God.

[General Maximus]

Granted, now you have to watch over 7 billion people all at once, tend to their every single need, fulfill all their wishes, and bear the blame for everything that goes wrong with them, driving you to madness.

I wish I had old oil lanterns in my house instead of modern electric lighting.

[Discord1996]

Granted but you accidently break one setting yourself on fire and let you suffer a slow and painful death.
I wish i had fresh underwear

[Magister Militum Flavius Aetius]

Granted, but it's made of thick, itchy wool and no matter how much you scratch the itching only gets worse, like a bad sunburn.

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

I wish I had another quarter.

[Spear Dog]

Granted, but it's a magic quarter and the ride never stops. You're trapped for eternity in a cartoon hell!

I wish I had a Podracer for the peak hour commute.

[Magister Militum Flavius Aetius]

Granted but someone throws their coffee out the window and it fries the electronics and you crash and explode spectacularly.

I wish I had Giant African Millipede (Archispirostreptus Gigas)

[Discord1996]

Granted, but a very stealthy bird broke into your house and ate it. He died afterwards and fell into your mouth while you were sleeping.
I wish the person under me has to eat a raisin cookie.

[Magister Militum Flavius Aetius]

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

How the hell does a bird the size of an eagle fall into your mouth?

Granted, but it gives me super strength and I punch you in the face for making me have to do it.

I wish I had an XM8.

[Librarian]

Granted, but now you have lost a friend (ex-mate = xm8)

I wish I could be a cyborg.

[General Maximus]

Granted, you are a cyborg but the stupid neighbourhood kid accidentally removes the electronic charger from it's socket, which results in half your body becoming immobile forever.

I wish I didn't had stupid neighbours.

[Spear Dog]

Granted. They're so stupid they came in one night to dance on your bed while you were trying to sleep. Bad mistake, no more neighbours.

I wish melange was real!

Melange

Melange – also called the "spice" – is the name of the fictional drug central to the Dune series of science fiction novels by Frank Herbert, and derivative works. In the series, the most essential and valuable commodity in the universe is melange, a geriatric drug that gives the user a longer life span, greater vitality, and heightened awareness; it can also unlock prescience in some humans, depending upon the dosage and the consumer's physiology. This prescience-enhancing property makes safe and accurate interstellar travel possible. Melange comes with a steep price, however: it is addictive, and withdrawal is fatal.

[weirdoascensor]

Granted, you're become the only melange user in the galaxy, since Butlerian Jihad never happened, humanity embaced human-machine union, and Astrogation simply uses Computers.

I wish the kids in my old highschool are able to make handheld rapid firing Coilgun for Science Fair.

[Magister Militum Flavius Aetius]

Granted but it generates a plasma plume and catches everything and everyone on fire.

I wish for three more wishes.