Attitudes to sex in modern Britain.

[Lusted]

I was reading a very interesting article in the Weekend section of the Guardian yesterday. It was all about how people's attitude to sex has changed over the past decade in Britain. People are having more sexual partners and one night stands, and as pornography has become much more widespread because of the internet, how we expect sex to have more variety. Also, many things that were taboo are less so now such as anal sex. People seem to be disocciating sex from loving relationships, and as something to do whenever they want. I personally feel that sex shoud only take place inside a loving relationship, as then it means much more and is much better for both of the people. Women are also becoming more influenced by porn it seems, seeing being sexy as a way to reclaim their sexuality, but in doing so reducing themselves more and more to objects of sex for some men. There are more and more websites where people can arrange to have sex, and more and more people are visitng them. Why have attitudes towards casual sex changed so much? Is this a good thing? What are your views on the matter? And are women being reduced to mere objects by the modern media and porn?

No explicit comments please, they will not be tolerated.

[Hader]

Well of course the media has had a HUGE influence on what is sexy, etc. (pretty obvious). I can't say why attitudes have changed so much, but without a doubt it is because of our good freind, the media. Some people may say that it is a good thing but that is because they are the ones partaking in these internet activities. Myself, I think that it is all right, it doesn't matter a whole lot because it is not anyhting major, but to see the idea of this get totally twisted, no, that is not good. You can't change sex like that. And yes, I think that women are letting themselves be reduced to objects by the media, etc. The media has too much influence and that makes these women change themselves to be or to do what is sexy.

[Spiff]

Sex for me is very closely tied to a loving relationship, as in i wouldnt have sex with someone i wasnt in love with. I do however have a few friends who take it as much less of a big deal than i think they should.. but then again i live near Dundee, which has like the highest teenage pregnancy in Scotland (maybe the UK in general, not sure). maybe it's my girlfriends view thats rubbed off on me, who knows, but i think we're both just sensible.

Not to say that i agree with the expression "Don't have sex if youre not ready to be a parent"

[Yorkshireman]

Women are also becoming more influenced by porn it seems, seeing being sexy as a way to reclaim their sexuality, but in doing so reducing themselves more and more to objects of sex for some men

I don't see the problem that women are more open about sex, their not reducing themselves to sex objects for men, but doing what men have always done. And why should'nt they ? It's very outdated to think that women don't enjoy sex just as much as men and if they wish to surf the net for partners or to warch porn I don't see the problem.

[Lusted]

I know that women enjoy sex as much as men, hell they probably enjoy it more than us, i certainly know my ex-girlfriend enjoyed it a lot. It is a good thing they are open to sex, but what kind of sex? Are they becomimng open to what porn expects them to do? I am saying that much of what we expect with sex, as in what we do, and how often we have sex, is highly influenced by porn. Sex is becoming more and more deemotionalised, it is being dissociated from love. The ironic thing is people are having more sex, but when in a marriage/long term relationship people end up having little to no sex.

[Yorkshireman]

I know that women enjoy sex as much as men, hell they probably enjoy it more than us, i certainly know my ex-girlfriend enjoyed it a lot. It is a good thing they are open to sex, but what kind of sex? Are they becomimng open to what porn expects them to do? I am saying that much of what we expect with sex, as in what we do, and how often we have sex, is highly influenced by porn. Sex is becoming more and more deemotionalised, it is being dissociated from love. The ironic thing is people are having more sex, but when in a marriage/long term relationship people end up having little to no sex.

I don't think women are influenced by porn to act a certain way. Most people have their preferences and won't be pressurised into doing something they don't want.

I personally don't associate sex solely with love, but just as an enjoyable activity between two consenting people, but everybody's different.

I agree about less sex in long terrm relationships though ! My experience is I get bored of the same thing, but then again many couples stay together for years and still enjoy a good sex life.

[Fenris]

It is no secret, not a new phenomenon and not limited to britain either...

[Darth Wong]

It's interesting that the prudish view of sexually liberated women is that they have "reduced" themselves to "sex objects" rather than expanding their sexual activities and interests while retaining the rest of their personalities. Do the people who say this feel that the non-sexual parts of a woman's personality go into remission when she expresses sexual enthusiasm or desire? Do they feel that a woman cannot be simultaneously horny and intellectual? It must be one or the other, but not both?

[Lusted]

It's interesting that the prudish view of sexually liberated women is that they have "reduced" themselves to "sex objects" rather than expanding their sexual activities and interests while retaining the rest of their personalities. Do the people who say this feel that the non-sexual parts of a woman's personality go into remission when she expresses sexual enthusiasm or desire? Do they feel that a woman cannot be simultaneously horny and intellectual? It must be one or the other, but not both?

I am not taking a prudish view of womens sexual liberation, i fully feel that women can be both horny and sexy(my ex girlfriend being a prime example, horny as you like and incredibly intelligent), i just feel that with the way the media portrays women, the "norm" for women is now as sex objects first, everything else second.

[Lord Tomyris]

From what I've seen, the women here are hornier than the men, and more likely to act on it. The women know how to get their wicked way! :laughing:

[Darth Wong]

I am not taking a prudish view of womens sexual liberation, i fully feel that women can be both horny and sexy(my ex girlfriend being a prime example, horny as you like and incredibly intelligent), i just feel that with the way the media portrays women, the "norm" for women is now as sex objects first, everything else second.

You mentioned pornography; do you feel that the men in pornography are portrayed as realistically nuanced characters? When media portrays women as sex objects, it generally portrays men in a very shallow light as well.

[Richard the Lionheart]

It's interesting that the prudish view of sexually liberated women is that they have "reduced" themselves to "sex objects" rather than expanding their sexual activities and interests while retaining the rest of their personalities. Do the people who say this feel that the non-sexual parts of a woman's personality go into remission when she expresses sexual enthusiasm or desire? Do they feel that a woman cannot be simultaneously horny and intellectual? It must be one or the other, but not both?

Good point.

But society ignores reality. It is society that will view them and treat them as sex-objects. That's the problem.

[I Have a Clever Name]

I believe the danger lies when women are portrayed as nothing but 'sex objects', rather than individual and emotive beings. A woman's sex drive is after all predominantly fuelled by feelings and emotions, far more so than their hairy, sweaty contemporaries.

[the Black Prince]

men are contemporary to women? interesting...
anyways...

what fuels a mans sex drive if not feelings and emotions? i was under the impression that hormones make it stronger, but don't fuel it as such...

[Nihil]

what fuels a mans sex drive if not feelings and emotions? i was under the impression that hormones make it stronger, but don't fuel it as such...

Different kinds of feelings and emotions. Womens romantic aspirations are concerned with long-term devotion and intimacy, mens are more often about pure sensation and unbridled lust. Women have those too, but they also have the silly ones I just mentioned. Fortunatley, we men are not hampered by such nonsense, for the most part. We just like breasts and buttocks. And who can blame us?

[MaximiIian]

what fuels a mans sex drive if not feelings and emotions?

Perhaps the innate will to propagate the species?

[I Have a Clever Name]

men are contemporary to women? interesting...
anyways...

It was a literary error on my part.

However, men and women are from the same time period so it could perhaps be considered viable!

what fuels a mans sex drive if not feelings and emotions? i was under the impression that hormones make it stronger, but don't fuel it as such...

Well, I didn't explicitly say that male attraction was purely motivated through primal hunger. Rapists do exist however.

[the Black Prince]

rape is rarely about sex and sex drive at all

[Emperor Dimitricus]

in my honest opinion, the attitude towards sex in this country saddens me. I have never had sex outside of a relationship, i never will. It saddens me that people flaunt what should be reserved for their significant others. does it not sicken you to think of how many other men have had the body of the one you love?
and its not just women im saddened by, its men as well. i fully understand why though, afterall, sex is one of the best things in life. i just wish it was more...i dunno. sacred? special?

[Yorkshireman]

in my honest opinion, the attitude towards sex in this country saddens me. I have never had sex outside of a relationship, i never will. It saddens me that people flaunt what should be reserved for their significant others. does it not sicken you to think of how many other men have had the body of the one you love?

I'm afraid thats something you will have to come to terms with unless you intend to marry a vestil virgin. Once you are past your teenage years it is very unusual to find a partner who has'nt already had a previous sexual relationship, maturity allows you to deal with this.

Everybody's different, plenty of people enjoy casual sexual relationships, men and women. It's a perfectly natural act and we've been at it like rabbit's since the dawn of mankind. Of course it's not compulsory and many people prefer to be in a relationship, but if not, there's nothing sordid about it. Sex does'nt need to be elevated to the status of some holy miracle.