Ohh lawwwd...IJ epic fail

[Justinian Australis]

Well...I doubt its IJ's fault, it could be the stupid AI but I still had to share this. This is the 3.0 beta as I cannot get 1.0 to play at all, even before the patch stuff up.

I am playing as the Sassanids and have invaded right up to Antioch. I have an army at the river crossing and it gets attacked by two large stacks. During the course of the battle I have found out that the Saravan cannot swim..as you'd imagine, what with all that armor on man and beast.



I've tried to arrange my cavalry and infantry in a horseshoe as the battle has progressed. The units are been damn slow to respond. Perhaps they have had enough of the Persian general and his stupid orders? Anyway, as they start to fan out, they fan out a little too far and soon I notice the numbers on some of the unit cards go red and rapidly decline. Turns out some have decided on a swim. Angry and abusive orders are given to get THE HELL OUT OF THE WATER and REFORM! That they do...to an extent and not after many bodies disappear down the steam. Half my heavy nags are wiped out.

Then, to top it all off and induce a major face palm, my general (perhaps despairing of his idiotic troops under his charge) heads towards the river with all men fanned out and commits suicide in the water (which is a Heroic death in the games eyes)

A major meltdown if there ever was one. Also the silly infantry along the river get attack by the Romans that remained on my side and just stood there.


Well of course victory seems certain you fools! They aren't fight back!!!!

There were some milites running around in circles at the front of the bridge and a Roman general died somehow without any of my men engaging him.........then, after having laughed their arses off on the other side of the bridge, the Romans turn around and head for home.

[juvenus]

Angry and abusive orders are given to get THE HELL OUT OF THE WATER and REFORM!

Then, to top it all off and induce a major face palm, my general (perhaps despairing of his idiotic troops under his charge) heads towards the river with all men fanned out and commits suicide in the water (which is a Heroic death in the games eyes)

A major meltdown if there ever was one. Also the silly infantry along the river get attack by the Romans that remained on my side and just stood there.

Well of course victory seems certain you fools! They aren't fight back!!!!

There were some milites running around in circles at the front of the bridge and a Roman general died somehow without any of my men engaging him.........then, after having laughed their arses off on the other side of the bridge, the Romans turn around and head for home.

first of all, i must say that i rarely laughed at any post like i did at this one
really good sense of humor.
as for this little incident with ur general accidentally killing himself i can tell u it has probably nothing to do with the mod.
perhaps, the Roman onslaught was such that ur general rather decided to commit a suicide than to await for his grim destiny

[vampiric_canniba]

My bridge battles stuff up as well. Simply put, my armies, and notably cavalry, have no idea how to cross a bridge. This once cost me a battle, a general and an entire stack of Frankish foederati. It took the limitanei reinforcements 5 seconds to win, because they actually crossed the bridge, without getting confused whilst a 1000 spears were being chucked at them.

[Turkeys!]

Whats worse is when some enemy soldiers try to cross the river and your troops engage and when they rout they follow them and then end up drowning in the river due to their own ineptitude

[juvenus]

Whats worse is when some enemy soldiers try to cross the river and your troops engage and when they rout they follow them and then end up drowning in the river due to their own ineptitude

but that's ur fault. u should either put them into the guard mod or micro-manage them to stop. it's ur job, u shouldn't expect the game to do everything perfectly while u sit back, eat a cake and enjoy

[Turkeys!]

but that's ur fault. u should either put them into the guard mod or micro-manage them to stop. it's ur job, u shouldn't expect the game to do everything perfectly while u sit back, eat a cake and enjoy

The game should realize not to make units follow routing units into where they normally can't go.

[Julianus Flavius]

That being said, though, you are supposed to be commanding an army of men, not mindless drones. While I know you have to do a lot more micromanaging than real life commanders, units shouldn't go and commit suicide, because that's just... well, silly really.
However, it's not the mod's fault, I've seen uis do this in almost every mod and vanilla too.

[juvenus]

While I know you have to do a lot more micromanaging than real life commanders, units shouldn't go and commit suicide, because that's just... well, silly really.

that's true. sadly, the new TW games have a significantly better engine but they're much more limited in terms of modding. if Rome 2 comes out, the units won't be that stupid, but we won't have such great mods cause the game will be locked like the etw, ntw, stw2.

[Justinian Australis]

Its actually the first time it's happened to me. I know its not the mod, its just IJ related and rather funny (and also maddening) so I thought people may like a giggle.

[Gen.jamesWolfe]

Well...I doubt its IJ's fault, it could be the stupid AI but I still had to share this. This is the 3.0 beta as I cannot get 1.0 to play at all, even before the patch stuff up.

I am playing as the Sassanids and have invaded right up to Antioch. I have an army at the river crossing and it gets attacked by two large stacks. During the course of the battle I have found out that the Saravan cannot swim..as you'd imagine, what with all that armor on man and beast.

I've tried to arrange my cavalry and infantry in a horseshoe as the battle has progressed. The units are been damn slow to respond. Perhaps they have had enough of the Persian general and his stupid orders? Anyway, as they start to fan out, they fan out a little too far and soon I notice the numbers on some of the unit cards go red and rapidly decline. Turns out some have decided on a swim. Angry and abusive orders are given to get THE HELL OUT OF THE WATER and REFORM! That they do...to an extent and not after many bodies disappear down the steam. Half my heavy nags are wiped out.

Then, to top it all off and induce a major face palm, my general (perhaps despairing of his idiotic troops under his charge) heads towards the river with all men fanned out and commits suicide in the water (which is a Heroic death in the games eyes)

A major meltdown if there ever was one. Also the silly infantry along the river get attack by the Romans that remained on my side and just stood there.


Well of course victory seems certain you fools! They aren't fight back!!!!

There were some milites running around in circles at the front of the bridge and a Roman general died somehow without any of my men engaging him.........then, after having laughed their arses off on the other side of the bridge, the Romans turn around and head for home.

Glitches win!

Flawless victory!

failality!

[Blatta Optima Maxima]

Wow, it seems you got the combination of just about every path-finding AI glitch in a single battle. +rep for such an achievement.

[Blatta Optima Maxima]

This just goes to show how disciplined Sassanid armies were.