Are my parents overprotective?

[PROFESSORPAUL]

I live with my grandmother and dad. Here is a list of things mosly my grandmother WILL NOT let me do. Note: I am 15 years old.

1. They will not let me stay overnight at a friend's house for a LAN party. They don't even like it when I go to a friend's house.

2. They don't like it when I go outside the house during the DAY. My grandmother always checked who went outside when she hears the door open or close, and if I even think about just walking around the property, she smacks down on me hard.

3. They don't want me to get a girlfriend.

4. They want me to use my cellphone only for emergency purposes.

5. My grandmother goes insane when I miss a meal. She always says she'll call the cops if I dont.


Now, I can disobey these things, but when I do, she gets angry and curses and always wins cause she has her "backup", which is my aunt, who agrees with her. My dad is more of the fun type, who could allow me to do most of this stuff, but is forced to listen to my grandmother for reasons unknown. So I was just wondering, do you think my parents are overprotective, and what should I do?

[Tacticalwithdrawal]

do they have a reason to be protective? ie. have you done something in the past/had something happen that would make them want to be protectve?

[Basileos Leandros I]

I came past these moments about 4-5 years ago...

I mean, I have much more freedom now(I mean, they even encourage me to go out on dates and such...). But, the thing is, I still get picked up at school by my dad and such. I mean, I had fear about 3 years ago because of gypsies and such, cuz one of them came at me and such...

But now, the idiots in my class make fun of this and it's annoying.

Note: I am 14 years old.

And have you done something in the past? Because it counts.

[Lord Kal]

In a word, yes.

[Lusted]

Over protective.

[Hyungoku]

hell yea

sounds like they dont even want u to hatch from ur egg

[Somethindarker]

yeas thats fairly overprotective bordering on possesive. your best bet would be to just ignore her and listen to your dad the sooner you let them know you aint "her" son the better but before you go all rebel on them make sure your dad is on your side let him know it aint fair and why does he listen to her. although i don't know your living situation tread softly and please don't go overboard. just let them know you're not 10 or 8 years old and u have a life too. also that thing with not letting you outside thats just blatent :wub:.

[Lord Kal]

Just blatantly disobey them and do what you want to (within reason.)

[Flogger]

That is definately overprotective. I'm 13 and can do all of those things; not that I do, but I could. You need to talk with your grandmother, she clearly doesn't understand that teenagers need freedom.

REBELLION! No only joking. Don't go that far.

[Søren]

Yes, they do sound extremly over-protective.

1. They will not let me stay overnight at a friend's house for a LAN party. They don't even like it when I go to a friend's house.

Not good.

2. They don't like it when I go outside the house during the DAY. My grandmother always checked who went outside when she hears the door open or close, and if I even think about just walking around the property, she smacks down on me hard.

Even worse

3. They don't want me to get a girlfriend.

Quite a few parents aren't very keen on children getting a girlfriend by 15 (though not all, by anymeans). If they just don't like it much, that doesn't seem toooo bad. If they activly try to block it, then that's a different matter altogether.

4. They want me to use my cellphone only for emergency purposes.

Any reason for that? Some people think that prolonged exposure to the electro-magnetic radiation used by cellphones can be dangerous. Newspapers tend to exaggerate it a bit. On the other hand, from the sounds of it, that may not be their reason.

5. My grandmother goes insane when I miss a meal. She always says she'll call the cops if I dont.

*ouch*

Just blatantly disobey them and do what you want to (within reason.)

That's a very bad idea, which won't make them understand your position, or make them re-consider, IMO.

My advice would be to try and see of you can get your dad to interfere in your favour with your grandmother at all. You say he is more reasonable, so maybe with a bit of patience he might help a little.

Your grandmother doesn't sound like the knid of person who's going too change her mind too easily, but I guess if you keep pushing at it, she might soften on certian areas a little.

I can't really say too much more from the information you've given.

I would strongly advise you against blatant disobedience, though, as it will only make her angry, which is hardly going to help your case.

[PROFESSORPAUL]

I haven't done anything in the past, my grandmother has always been this way. I was one of the nicest kids in my school.

I have tried to get my dad involved with it and try to have him reason a deal, but it doesn't seem to work, cause like I said, she always wins since she basically owns me and my dad.

I have tried reasoning with her and asking her why she is this way. She just says everytime that "I don't want you to get hurt and I'm the boss. Wait till your 18 and MAYBE you can".

Sometimes I wish I had one of those parents that just didn't care about what I do.

Hell, I had more freedom when I was 5 and I do now. That was when I lived with my dad in Auburn in a neighborhood. I'd leave the house at 9:00 in the morning and not be back until 10:00 at night.

[Mathias]

Sometimes I wish I had one of those parents that just didn't care about what I do.

Well my parents arent exactly like that, they do care what I do, I just don`t care about them at all so I just don`t listen to them, but they arent strict anyway and that makes it a lot easier.

And yes your parents are very overprotective

[Last Roman]

well your dad sounds fine, but your grandma...well, I couldn't stand it

[Gogoas]

I live with my grandmother and dad. Here is a list of things mosly my grandmother WILL NOT let me do. Note: I am 15 years old.

1. They will not let me stay overnight at a friend's house for a LAN party. They don't even like it when I go to a friend's house.

2. They don't like it when I go outside the house during the DAY. My grandmother always checked who went outside when she hears the door open or close, and if I even think about just walking around the property, she smacks down on me hard.

3. They don't want me to get a girlfriend.

4. They want me to use my cellphone only for emergency purposes.

5. My grandmother goes insane when I miss a meal. She always says she'll call the cops if I dont.


Now, I can disobey these things, but when I do, she gets angry and curses and always wins cause she has her "backup", which is my aunt, who agrees with her. My dad is more of the fun type, who could allow me to do most of this stuff, but is forced to listen to my grandmother for reasons unknown. So I was just wondering, do you think my parents are overprotective, and what should I do?

Wow, my best advice for you is to keep posting and reading these forums cause from what I can tell you should try and get as much social contact as possible I feel sorry for you don't think I could have ever handled something like that. Just keep fighting! The moment you stop you'll go insane and become a hermit, scary but true.

[LegionnaireX]

Wow, I'd have to say your Grandma is beyond over protective. She isn't just sheltering you, she is taking away all of your freedom. And cursing at you? Thats crazy. My grandmothers are pleasant, loving people who would have a small heart-attack themselves if they heard me curse. Does your dad know about this? If not you should definately tell him. Don't let the old lady push you around.

[RZZZA]

Do what all white teenage kids do to rebel...

Start listening to offensive music, like heavy metal, satanic rock, or gangsta rap.

Start smoking, start not caring, start bringing home girls and *gasp* taking them to your room!

Get a cell phone, it gives you more freedom and still allows your parents to contact you if need be.

I was just kidding about the smoking part, dont smoke, it ruins you.

[MaximiIian]

Well, paulie, my advice is to ignore your grandma and just do whatever.

[Osceola]

Sorry if this sounds harsh but, ignore the old *****. Her power is mental not physical. Just block her out. Do whatever the hell you please. Just dont kill anyone.

Like I said her power is mental not physical. If she swears at you, swear right back. Walk out of the house at any time. If she threatens to call the police, threaten right back with child abuse accusations. It might be :wub:, but hey, what shes making you up with is :wub:. Fight :wub: with :wub:!

Rebellion has its uses anyways. This is one of them.

[PyrrhusIV]

I wouldnt encourage that, I tend to lean towards TBN's idea's.

[Removed_user_012521]

Where do you live? Suburbs? City? ANyhow she doesn't wan't you to get a girl friend? Tell her to **** off and get a girfriend anyway. What do you need to do ask permission?
Anyway I was never under that much restriction, when I was 12 I was already expanding my (sphere of influence) for miles, taking occasional trips to Wheaton (about 3 miles away) on my bike. Going out for lunch or dinner on weekends, ect. But man I have to say that sucks for you. Does she let you do anything violent? Paintball? Football?

My advice is rough, but can work. Disobey her, she'll get ****** off and shout at you, shout back, tell her your frikin 15 and she's stragling your social life, tell her your not going to take that **** from her and demand to have your freedom. The key though is defiance, there isn't anything she can do, sell the idea of either "cooperation or no cooperation either way Im gonna do this".