University liberals blaming America first (again!)

[Askthepizzaguy]

What is it with these university-dwelling liberals always spending state tax dollars to fund projects that find fault with America?

These blame-America-firsters have the gall to spend money that you and I earn to point fingers at this great country and find fault with it, without recognizing and appreciating the greatness of this country and just how awesome it truly is. And where, where are they pointing fingers this time? Right in the middle of "Real" America. The northern Rockies, ladies and gentleman.

These kind and decent, hardworking folks might be thousands of miles away from the epicenters of liberal degeneration like San Fran-sicko and New York City, but they find their states are once again being made the target of liberal fault-finding. Frankly I find it disgraceful.

What else is going on at this liberal university? I have to know, what else are they up to? Well I did a little research on the Wiki-pedia and I found out something else you might not know about Idaho State University. Their official colors are black and orange. Let me run that by you again: black and orange. Now, a color like orange I can understand. Our friend John Boehner is orange. But you have to suspect that the reason why all the other colors did not get made the official color of Idaho State University was because of a little thing I like to call Affirmative Action. Where are all the white colors? The brown colors? The red colors? The yellow colors? Where are they? You won't find them at Idaho Stalinist University.

These socialist scientists never stop! First, they blame America for the changing of the climate of the Earth, and some nonsense about the ozone layer, and now they're finding fault with America itself. I'm not kidding, they're literally finding fault with the very ground you and I stand on. What's their angle? My guess is to spend more of your tax dollars trying to prevent some other wacky catastrophe that could only ever happen in an Al Gore mockumentary, like an earthquake. An Earthquake! In the Rockies! What they really should be doing is keeping their noses out of other people's backyards, and focus on the really, really big fault running straight through California. Earthquake in the rockies. Next, they'll be telling us that a brief cold front doesn't disprove global warming, those communist thugs.

These over-educated dumb-o-crats won't be through shoving their elitist educratic philosophy down the throats of our impressionable young children until they all subscribe to the so called scientific consensus. You know what a consensus is? It's when a group of know-nothing know-it-alls get together and mostly vote the same way, and silence the patriotic voices of dissent among us. The brave people who stand up and say "So what if there's lead in our paint? Just don't eat the paint chips and you'll be fine. As a matter of fact, EAT the paint chips. It's your right as an American." The brave folks who stand up and say "So what if we're dumping concentrated pig feces from an industrial farm directly into the rivers and streams? That's where it's all going to end up anyway. It's all part of the circle of nature or something." The brave, passionate folks who say "Cancer? What cancer? Smoke em if you got em. And there's really no need for all those pesky warning labels. Take a risk, live a little!"

The amount of brave patriots in this country seems to be on the decline everywhere except real America. The men and women who fight our wars for us, and bleed every day on the battlefield. And don't let those fact-checking truthmongers tell you that folks come from bleeding heart liberal states to fight for this country too, because I asked my friend Marty and he told me that was total bull droppings. And you can trust Marty, he's got a really trustworthy face, don't you Marty?

So remember friends, America-lovers from REAL America, waving your American flags and eating your apple pies covered in hot dog slices while slurping down your french fry smoothies, whenever you hear a news story like this where some egghead "scientists" take YOUR tax dollars and end up finding faults in America, just remember that you can take action. Write to your congressmen, and tell them that you want your money back. It's time to tell Idaho Communist Re-education Camp University to close their doors and head back to Russia where they belong.


http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20101118/..._idaho_seismic

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

SALMON, Idaho (Reuters) – Scientists at Idaho State University have mapped a previously unknown and active seismic fault in the northern Rockies capable of unleashing an earthquake with a magnitude as high as 7.5.

The newly discovered fault in central Idaho does not lie in a densely populated area.

But Glenn Thackray, chairman of the university's geosciences department, said the 40-mile-long fracture in the Earth's crust at the base of the Sawtooth Mountains near the tiny mountain town of Stanley is cause for some concern.

"There's a chance in the next few decades there will be an earthquake on this fault, and if it does happen it will be a rather large earthquake," he said.

A 7.5 tremor is considered a major earthquake, capable of widespread heavy damage.

[Related: Decade's most haunting earthquakes]

Such a temblor would be most keenly felt at an epicenter near Stanley, home to about 100 year-round residents, with moderate shaking expected to extend from the resort community of Sun Valley to the capital city of Boise, Thackray said.

Scientists located the fault with a remote sensing technique that relies on laser-equipped airplanes. They were able to gather data about its history by analyzing sediment cores lifted from Redfish Lake, a mountain lake on the fault line famous for its historic sockeye salmon runs.

Thackray said researchers believe the fault triggered two earthquakes over the past 10,000 years, one some 7,000 years ago and another 4,000 years ago, suggesting significant seismic activity occurs at the site every several thousand years.

"Predicting when a fault might rupture is a real uncertainty of science," he said. "The problems with earthquakes and faults are they don't follow reliable patterns."

Given the findings, it may be prudent for towns like Stanley to revamp building codes and emergency preparedness plans, Thackray said.

A fault at Idaho's tallest mountain caused a 6.9 magnitude earthquake in 1983. The Borah Peak earthquake killed two children when a storefront collapsed in the central Idaho town of Challis and damaged buildings within a 50-mile radius. Other active faults in central Idaho lie in the Beaverhead, Lemhi and Lost River mountain ranges.

This post is an example of satire. No animals were harmed in the making of this joke.

Not that you'd care if people died, would you, PETA?

Bunch of bleeding hearts.

Idaho state: Communist recruiting center? BE WARNED, AMERICA!!

[Poach]

Very good, you should write for Palin. Would be great hearing all that come from her.

[Imperial]

FOX worthy, IMO

[Askthepizzaguy]

Who cares what college kids think? They'll grow up in the real world soon enough and find out everything isn't all rose peddles like they assume.

Right, and I'm sure that when they find out what it's all really about, it will shake the very ground they're walking on. The revelation will literally be earth-shattering, and it will rock them deeply to the very core of their being, and their mantle of erudite congratulatory self-importance will break loose and cause all kinds of things to come crashing down on their heads.

[RO Citizen]

3 words: Oh my god....and a facepalm

[Timoleon of Korinthos]

Jesus Christ, guys, he's being sarcastic. He even admits it in the text within the spoilers.

[Askthepizzaguy]

Jesus Christ guys, he's being sarcastic. He even admits in the text within the spoilers.

Shhhh!!! This is hilarious. I want to see how many people don't actually read it all before commenting.

Your satire needs work.

Au contraire, Big War Bird, it apparently matches the stereotype of a right-winger so well that people actually cannot tell the difference.

I'd say I hit the target right on the bulls-eye.

[Burnum]

What this proves is that once again Liebrals and their socialist agenda show their desire for America to fail, because Liebrals can only institute their agenda on back of American failure. We see it again and again, these so-called 'progressives" eagerly awaiting America's failure, in the Middle east, in Afghanistan, even on the Wall-street. Can you not see them Rub their little hands every time a working, patriotic American loses their home in a foreclosure?

You cannot allow these traitors to try and institute their socialist agenda in government, we must force these traitors out of government, even by drastic measures. One Liebral is a more serious threat to America than a thousand members of Al qaeda, because Al qaeda can only harm the physical. But Liebrals, like a burrowing festering maggot, infest the mind and psyche of normal human beings, turning them into depraved, empty shells who spread depravity where ever they go. Celebrating dead soldiers? Secretly support the Islamic Supremacists, abroad and at home (i.e Hamas and the Taliban)? Nothing is beyond them. God help us, even sexualizing our children? The worst part they enjoy the freedom and protections we offer while perverting everything we hold dear.

[Boyar Son]

Shhhh!!! This is hilarious. I want to see how many people don't actually read it all before commenting.



Au contraire, Big War Bird, it apparently matches the stereotype of a right-winger so well that people actually cannot tell the difference.

I'd say I hit the target right on the bulls-eye.

When you get negative responses about a satire: "baaw you ain't funny", there's a really good chance you're doing it right

[Big War Bird]

Your satire is faulty.

[Timoleon of Korinthos]

I, for one, think his satire was exceptional. His sense of humour is keen and his acumen sharp. I literally rolled on the floor laughing with some of the quotes.

You know what a consensus is? It's when a group of know-nothing know-it-alls get together and mostly vote the same way, and silence the patriotic voices of dissent among us. The brave people who stand up and say "So what if there's lead in our paint? Just don't eat the paint chips and you'll be fine. As a matter of fact, EAT the paint chips. It's your right as an American." The brave folks who stand up and say "So what if we're dumping concentrated pig feces from an industrial farm directly into the rivers and streams? That's where it's all going to end up anyway. It's all part of the circle of nature or something." The brave, passionate folks who say "Cancer? What cancer? Smoke em if you got em. And there's really no need for all those pesky warning labels. Take a risk, live a little!"

Sheer brilliance.

[Big War Bird]

Au contraire, Big War Bird, it apparently matches the stereotype of a right-winger so well that people actually cannot tell the difference.

I'd say I hit the target right on the bulls-eye.

The purpose of satire is promote social change by using wit and ridicule. Now you would have a point if this discovery was made by way of a gender studies program or some such drivelly program so charished and inflicted by left wing acedemics. Instead it was discovered by geologists, a hard science discipline that conservatives say should be the focus of university studies.

[Timoleon of Korinthos]

The purpose of satire is promote social change by using wit and ridicule.

Which is precisily what he is doing by ripping apart the stereotypical right-winger's attitude.
The study of the geologists simply provides him with the opportunity to do so.

[Big War Bird]

Which is precisily what he is doing by ripping apart the stereotypical right-winger's attitude.
The study of the geologists simply provides him with the opportunity to do so.

I think you don't know what the average right wingers attitude is to higher education, considering right wingers have more of them.

[Timoleon of Korinthos]

I think you don't know what the average right wingers attitude is to higher education, considering right wingers have more of them.

Except that it's not the right winger's attitude to higher education that is being satirised.

[Askthepizzaguy]

I think you don't know what the average right wingers attitude is to higher education, considering right wingers have more of them.

Statistically speaking, the more educated you are, the more liberal-leaning you become. That's why conservative pundits like Limbaugh demonize "Ivy-league latte-lapping limousine liberals who think they know better than us" all the time.

Perhaps liberals do in fact have more of "them" higher education(s), in general. It's not always true, but it is the perfect fodder for those who wish to sow divisions in our society based on such petty statistical differences.

[Mr. Scott]

Statistically speaking, the more educated you are, the more liberal-leaning you become. That's why conservative pundits like Limbaugh demonize "Ivy-league latte-lapping limousine liberals who think they know better than us" all the time.

Perhaps liberals do in fact have more of "them" higher education(s), in general. It's not always true, but it is the perfect fodder for those who wish to sow divisions in our society based on such petty statistical differences.

then why am I a conservative? I'm not religious at all and I have a very good education, yet I am a conservative. My brother goes to UCLA, yet he is a conservative and not-religious.

the intellectuals who are liberal know nothing of economics. If you want a more realistic view on economics, ask the business majors, not the art majors.

[The spartan]

I think you don't know what the average right wingers attitude is to higher education, considering right wingers have more of them.

Yet those with PHDs tend to be Liberal.

The sheer amount of conservative butthurt on this page is spectacular.

This.

Apparently the "right-wingers" don't have a sense of humor.

[Phier]

Yet those with PHDs tend to be Liberal.

If you worked with PhD's you would not be surprised

[Askthepizzaguy]

The purpose of satire is promote social change by using wit and ridicule. Now you would have a point if this discovery was made by way of a gender studies program or some such drivelly program so charished and promoted left wing acedemics. Instead it was discovered by geologists, a hartd science discipline that conservatives say should be the focus of university studies.

No, the object of the satire here isn't what was being studied, in fact the non-controversial and entirely besides the point revelation of a fault line in Idaho being made the subject of an over-the-top scaremongering rant about socialism is part of the punchline. In fact the entire thing is a play on words.... "finding fault in America". Not that clever, really, but the devil is in the delivery.

The object of the satire is the knee-jerk reaction to everyday news, being delivered by a Limbaugh-like pundit in such a way to demonize liberals and shore up the conservative base, in such a manner that any ordinary person would look at that pundit and call him or her a blowhard and be absolutely 100% right. That's the joke.

The sad part is, people can't even tell the joke from the genuine article anymore, thus proving that the genuine article has actually become the real joke. If the purpose of satire is to promote social change through ridicule, then perhaps such over-the-top punditry is the thing that needs to change.