Consider taking Bern unless Ajaccio has built up as a fortress. Toulouse is too far away from Milan and Genoa to properly reinforce with castle-based units.
It depends on what traits the princess had to increase her charm. You can refer to the
character traits guide for details. There are quite a few of "Wife is ..." traits.
Define crazy aggressive. In my current game as England, VH/M, I allied with France, successfully encircled Paris and Rheims by taking their surrounding regions from rebels and from the HRE, leaving only Marseille as an outlet for France. I'm almost up to turn 30 and they're still friendly allies, except for sending a full stack across my Dijon to their Marseille despite the fact we don't have a military access agreement. I wish I could penalise them for violating my borders like they do to our relationship when I cross their borders.
And despite not having a common border with either Moors or Sicily, they seem obsessed with attacking my Toulouse. If Sicily is still excommunicated when my crusade to Jerusalem happens, I'm going to make a stop on the beautiful beaches of Palermo and hopefully put an end to Sicily's insanity.