Challenge/Duel vote: Nanny vs LuckyLewis {Photgraphy by KillerBee}
One VOTE per customer. Please choose with selective veracity.
Submission 1
Spoiler Alert, click show to read:
"Cut! Cut!!"
A collective groan. The extras had been in the sun for 6 hours. They were getting restless. These American directors...such divas.
"Christ, Michael, what now?". The production assistant, a wormy bean counter sent by the studio to keep tabs was already popping a vein in his forehead. Any more delays, he thought, and the REAL rebel army would return. And it had been enough work making Liberia look like Punjab...a modern miracle he reminded Michael of every day.
"These idiots are killing my shot! This isn't a football match...its a bloody battle! Christ, those four on the right...YA YOU GUYS!...useless turds...they were laughing. LAUGHING Rick! You think Cameron's extras laugh??!"
"Michael, we can't be so choosy here. These people are barely getting paid, its bloody hot, and we have to be done this entire battle by Tuesday. Don't pretend this is going to be an Oscar contender...I mean, dammit Michael we have Justin Bieber in a lead role for chrissakes. Just get it DONE, or I'm calling The Bosses."
Michael threw down his headset in a rage. "Don't threaten me you corporate arse-kisser! This is HIGH ART. Art, Rick. You aren't familiar with it. I think this is Oscar-worthy, Rick. If you aren't on board with that, get your pasty arse back to New York!"
Rick put his face in his hands. Over-budget. Over-due. The tabloids were already publishing pictures of Justin's deviant dalliances in Bangkok. This disaster was going to make Battlefield Earth look good. "Look Michael," Rick's tone was suddenly conciliatory "We can edit out the laughers. We're already going to green-screen that elephant...there is no WAY a bull with junk that big will get us down to 14A. We'll colour the smoke...our history guy says its TOO white. This is post production stuff. Our guys do magic. Don't be so picky here. We all recognize your brilliance, you are a wizard, ok? But if this doesn't hit the streets by November, we're all sunk. I'm just trying to help you. Help me...help YOU."
"Don't McGuire me Rick. Yes, I AM brilliant, I don't need you to remind me." Michael sighed...nobody appreciated his artistry. He was always misunderstood. "Alright Rick, we do it your way...we'll cow-tow to your corporate masters. We'll get this done today, flaws and all. But I draw the line...the all-male orgy scene with Lewis stays IN!"
Submission 2
Spoiler Alert, click show to read:
The Bodemlozenges
We marched on the Bodemlozenges. They were rather quaint creatures, living on the vibrant lands outside Nawalgarh, feasting on delicious foods within their self claimed Haveli. They would eagerly walk with pride and grace, while gently singing songs about the very debts of their so called honour. They were held in high regard by many, but not us. For we, as the common people will march on the Bodemlozenges.
The youngest of the feared Bodemlozenges was Fanny, a peculiar fellow; we would always see him from top of the Bodemlozenge tower. He would constantly watch us, his head would mechanically twist and rotate and his eyes kindly provided a wide eyed gaze. He carried a piece of parchment as a keen scribe, a self proclaimed ‘Poet of the Realm’ who used his ever present gaze for that much needed inspiration.
Occasionally, some of young Bodemlozenge's work would make a feathery fall from the beloved tower onto the rugged ground below; he was a staunch believer that his work would prosper with age like the very wine he drunk, his parchments would be renowned with a spice of wit. Foolishly, he never became unaware that unlike the fine wine, it required his overused scribe hand and his unsharpened mind soon punished him for his idiocy.
Elsewhere in the Bodemlozenge Haveli stood Moga, while Fanny had an interest in us and the parchment,
Moga had a bizarre fascination with hermaphroditic animals, particularly with the newly arrived snails from across the abyssal depths of the seas on the British Isles. He watched as the two lovely snails, coined Lesus and Nubuatai, glided across the paved white stones as the vegetation slowly engulfed the passage.
Our lands were littered with parchments and hermaphrodites, they were tainted by the Bodemlozenges as they continued to disregard us, the common people of Nawalgarh.
We finally had enough of such blasphemy as we anxiously gathered the muskets and swords together. I quickly grasped my father’s carefully crafted sword and climbed upon a friendly beast standing motionless in the dry tall grass. We marched on the Bodemlozenges.
Here is how we arrived at this Titanic moment in TotW History...
http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?t=373913
Originally Posted by LuckyLewis
