Napoleon Total War Multiplayer Humor

I do this most of the day really, just like I chat with players online on Napoleon Total War.

Watching UFC: "Ok Brock Lesnar needs to flank his opponent and hopefully his opponent won't kite after he gets the first shots."

Watching Golf: "Ok Tiger Wood's need to take a long range artillery piece to take a shot at his target over the green."

American Football: "The Saints are gonna split their forces in three sections and drive down the Colts center and cause a chain rout to take the victory."

Doctor: "Ok Sir, Im gonna flank your intestine with my scalpel, and then Im gonna ambush it after with some pain killer."

To screaming child "stop being a big rage quitter"

To Wife " If your going to keep bringing up that fixed art incident everytime we we fight we'll never put it behind us"

I started having really weird dreams. Like there'd be two people arguing, and every time one would make good point, I'd have an image of troop movement to flank an enemy and such.

when ur gonna bone the missus u give her the rules. no camping, 2 gobbles, 5 positions max...

Originally Posted by triphammer

when ur gonna bone the missus u give her the rules. no camping, 2 gobbles, 5 positions max...

During these types of matches, I like to bring the Guard Seamen

Originally Posted by Point_Man

During these types of matches, I like to bring the Guard Seamen

......it starts

I like to impose the following rules on my wife before having sex with her triphammer:
1. No urination.
2. No release of excrement (unless induced by anal sex and therefore uncontrollable).
3. Maximum of ten pussy farts per minute.
4. Maximum of five regular farts per minute.
5. Minimum of two bags over her head at all times.

Originally Posted by Major Hemorrhoid

I like to impose the following rules on my wife before having sex with her triphammer:
1. No urination.
2. No release of excrement (unless induced by anal sex and therefore uncontrollable).
3. Maximum of ten pussy farts per minute.
4. Maximum of five regular farts per minute.
5. Minimum of two bags over her head at all times.

and absolutely zero kiting

Originally Posted by Major Hemorrhoid

I like to impose the following rules on my wife before having sex with her triphammer:
1. No urination.
2. No release of excrement (unless induced by anal sex and therefore uncontrollable).
3. Maximum of ten pussy farts per minute.
4. Maximum of five regular farts per minute.
5. Minimum of two bags over her head at all times.

do you finish her off with the round shot or canister shot, major?i find both to be potent

hey major h, if its no rules with the wife would fisting be allowed...lol.

"Fisting" is not only allowed but encouraged, triphammer!

This topic went from funny to wtbh in a matter of Hemorhoid.

I'm afraid that at my age Y@!SN, my howitzer has lost some of it's "potency". Still, every once in awhile I do get a good spread of canister shot or a nice long range round shot in!

duck n cover major h, duck n cover lol...

This thread was supposed to be funny but now this is just more information then I wanted to know from you guys xD

All we need now is a day to get together, meet each other, and have beers

I'm up for that Point_Man! You're all invited to join me for some nice, refreshing crude oil parfait and some toxic gas inhalation on the pristine (well, it used to be anyway ) American gulf coast!
http://www.youtube.com/watchh?v=Js2hqkShrtM

i remember the last get together i had with the hemorrhoid clan. major h, bernard and dirt box laced my beer with mind altering substances. then set me up with one of thier so called groupey's called "back shot" who i later found out when i finally sobered up wasnt exactly a female but abit of both. i had to scrub my old chap for ages in the shower whilst listening to the song "crying game"....

Well I never claimed that our parties were perfect triphammer!

Triphammer, lets go get some beers at the pub and place stakes and camp there for a bit

i think thats certainly a good idea point mate...