Re: The Generals
I micro-manage their ancillary characters a lot! I use family members as Generals until they get to 40 or so unless they have good management or influence stats then they govern. If I have a gov-general who has good command stats, I'll swap his characters with a general who doesn't. I just prefer having a general with a cavalry escort, if they need to turn the tide somewhere on the field, they can get there quicker.
I like to leave family members in a city with an academy or better until they are 20-21, then send them out with another general (unless they have good command stats in which case they get their own stack) to get experience, or if they end up getting good mgt/influence they go to manage a settlement.
And if you get a really bad governor/general who just has bad stats, well they get sent to fight on the frontier until they improve or die trying