"WTF" Moments

[Drakedeath]

We all have them. You give an order, and the result makes you stare dumbfounded and ask no one in particular, "What the ?"

For example, my Macedonian assassin had a 95% chance of success to kill a Roman captain. I wanted more subterfuge, so I went with it. He died. He was my best assassin (6 subterfuge )

Then there's the more commonplace 93% chance to infiltrate an enemy city and the spy fails.

And auto-resolving a battle of 6 units of Royal Pikemen, 4 Macedonian Cav, and a General against two Dacian Warbands....and losing half of the men in each unit.

Post yours.

[Decist]

My Hounds of culan running around at the bottom of their siege tower.

[Drakedeath]

My Hounds of culan running around at the bottom of their siege tower.

That's just a glitch people call the siege tower shuffle. You just have to order them to go on the wall in front of the tower, then cancel the order, click again, cancel, and repeat until all of them are in the tower.

[Dave Strider]

I ordered an army to releive a besieged city, my finger slipped, I right clicked on a tile that was the one just above it, and they move towards their only to run out of movement points and have to go another 2 turns to get there. ING GAME!!!!!!!!!

[Aonghus G. Friedhold]

I seriously came to this forum to make this topic. Same title and everything, you mind reader you.

Anyway, I hate it when the path finding makes your units run everywhere except where you ordered them to go. For example, I was leading an army of 1,500 Portuguese(Rome Medieval Mod) soldiers against about 4,000 Moors. I was kicking ass, with a strong battle line, good archers, and flanking movements. Then, the main bulk of the 4 Moorish armies shows up. They hit my battle line exactly as I want them to, my flanking force comes around the back, I give the order to attack, and... my cavalry runs off after random fleeing units. No matter what I do, I can't get them not to chase them. By the time I regain control, my battle line is broken and my army is routing. From 200 losses and 2000 kills, to 1000 losses and 2050 kills.

[Drakedeath]

I seriously came to this forum to make this topic. Same title and everything, you mind reader you.

Anyway, I hate it when the path finding makes your units run everywhere except where you ordered them to go. For example, I was leading an army of 1,500 Portuguese(Rome Medieval Mod) soldiers against about 4,000 Moors. I was kicking ass, with a strong battle line, good archers, and flanking movements. Then, the main bulk of the 4 Moorish armies shows up. They hit my battle line exactly as I want them to, my flanking force comes around the back, I give the order to attack, and... my cavalry runs off after random fleeing units. No matter what I do, I can't get them not to chase them. By the time I regain control, my battle line is broken and my army is routing. From 200 losses and 2000 kills, to 1000 losses and 2050 kills.

Indeed, I am also aware you intend to have chicken for a meal sometime in the next week.


I have that happen way too much. I had a Carthaginian landing force near Capua to finish off the Scipii, and the Brutii sent an army north to attack me from behind. My army was a number of Poeni in phalanx formation, with Samnites and Libyans to protect the flanks, one unit of skirmishers, elephants, a general, and five units of Long Shields. I planned to push downhill against the Brutii, rout them, send my Long Shields after the routers, then rush back up the hill to engage the Scipii on equal ground.

Starts off great. My Poeni push against the hastati and rout them, kill two Brutii family members, and send the Brutii in almost full flight. But the Scipii arrived too quickly, and, in order to prevent my Poeni from being hit from the rear, I reformed my battle line and faced the Scipii, recalled my Long Shields, and stood ready.

The Scipii crashed against the phalanxes, and made progress due to their hill advantage. I moved my Long Shields and general around to the flank and attempted a hammer-and-anvil strike on a unit of Princepes. Instead, my Long Shields charged after some Scipii velites and returning, weakened Brutii troops. My general charged, but the angle was bad, and he killed himself on one of my Poeni's spears.

Despite my attempts to rerout the Long Shields to points of crisis, they kept pursuing weak or routing units. As such, the Brutii and Scipii isolated, surrounded, and killed my Poeni. My exhausted Long Shields were caught by three fresh Scipii generals and the winded Brutii general, and also killed. I have no idea what happened to my skirmishers.

[Xellos_Moon]

I sent a full stack with my best general from Caralis to palma...but you cant get there with just 1 turn. So while i the middle of the sea a freaking pirate fleet attacked mine. Guess what happened next

[SoulBlade]

^ auto_win defender? ^^

[A Demented Goldfish]

In BI playin goths all my family members died at the hands of a horde of huns and i was left wiv my ageing faction leader. who died 2 turns before i trained a general from my capital!

[Acco]

The following doesn't really relate to an order I've given, but it made me release a great sigh. I've been playing a campaign as Carthage, and quickly subjugated Spain, North Africa, Sicily and southern Italy. I've been at war with the Roman factions for as long as I can remember, and I've destroyed the Scipii, the Senate and kicked the Brutii out of Italy (they're hiding somewhere in Greece, methinks). Only the damned Julii are in my way. So I made a few incursions into their territory and captured Arretium (I think; the city next to their capital), and I thought that my campaign against them would soon be over after I capture the capital. But over in Spain, I moved a spy into Gaul's territory and discovered that the Gaulish province was actually Julii. Intrigued, I disabled the fog of war (excuse the cheat.. ). That's when I said WTF. The Julii expanded as far north as Britannia and had captured a good portion of Gaul and Germania. Northern Europe is basically Roman. So it looks like it'll be superpower versus superpower, as they indubitably have tons of armies up north.

[A Demented Goldfish]

The following doesn't really relate to an order I've given, but it made me release a great sigh. I've been playing a campaign as Carthage, and quickly subjugated Spain, North Africa, Sicily and southern Italy. I've been at war with the Roman factions for as long as I can remember, and I've destroyed the Scipii, the Senate and kicked the Brutii out of Italy (they're hiding somewhere in Greece, methinks). Only the damned Julii are in my way. So I made a few incursions into their territory and captured Arretium (I think; the city next to their capital), and I thought that my campaign against them would soon be over after I capture the capital. But over in Spain, I moved a spy into Gaul's territory and discovered that the Gaulish province was actually Julii. Intrigued, I disabled the fog of war (excuse the cheat.. ). That's when I said WTF. The Julii expanded as far north as Britannia and had captured a good portion of Gaul and Germania. Northern Europe is basically Roman. So it looks like it'll be superpower versus superpower, as they indubitably have tons of armies up north.

same fing happened to me in my parthian campaign

[alistairmills]

when the game ctd's

[nvm]

Phalangites got pwned by chariots

I ran my general into my own phalanx and he died
I ran my phalanx into my general and he didnt die
militia hoplites and 2 seleucid generals got pwned by eastern faction leader who had no javelins

[roam]

When i order some ha to skirmish and they go the other way straight into the unit they are supposed to be skimrishing from
That irritating thing that sometimes happens when you order some heavy cav to charge and they don''t lower their spears resulting in a pointless charge that does nothing

[Thracius]

Pretty much the same as every total war game, the enemy gets a surprise bonus check, plus insta build buildings, and unlimited armies. When it gets to that stage of gameplay in Rome It's a real turn off of the game, it's not a challenge at all, it's just plain annoying. It's usually when I start a new campaign too

Oh and how elephants completely suck in Diadochi mod.

[Genius of the Restoration]

The really strange casualty healing patterns. I've posted this before but it's still amusing. They've got to be pretty amazing healers if they can heal every single member of a unit that had been wiped out. Shame other units didn't receive any attention at all.

[The-Lion-Heart]

Getting my own elephant falling dead on my general and killing him.

[Drakedeath]

Getting my own elephant falling dead on my general and killing him.

Defending Lilybaeum and my faction leader is killed by an elephant that ran amok when the Romans used fire arrows on it.

[aceking90]

When ever I have a calvary unit on skirmish but they don't run until just moments before they are attacked and so they get caught by infantry and lose like a quarter of their unit.

[Dan the Man]

Hitting my own general with flaming Onager ammo.