Suicide

[JP226]

I suppose this is the place for a thread like this.

Let me begin by throwing out there a HUGE WTF. A few hours ago my mothers cousin, my 2nd cousin, was found with a bullet hole in his head. He was unmarried, in his sixties, both parents had passed away and he was retired with more than enough money having been an weapons system engineer all his life. Alas he was depressed. Tell how life can be so depressing that your willing to take your own? I can't comprehend. I can't understand the why, you have food on the table a roof over your head, friends and family all to resort to. Even if friends and family were amiss, just having food shelter and water at all times, is many times better than what the vast majority of humanity has gone through sine we first walked the Earth, 5k years ago...

It makes me think, if I ever got that damned depressed, depressed to the point that I'd shoot myself, I'd go balls out into the setting sun. Steal a car, travel in a barrel over niagara. Maybe hijack a yacht, load it with cannons and rape and pillage the Caribbean, I'd go out on a bang, a bang beyond the sound of the gun shot anyhow.

Maybe this is just me blabbering because the information is kind of a shock. He was apart of my family, always saw him on holidays although we were never extremely close, it's obviously close enough to hit home. So... how is depression can be such a potent weapon?

[cfmonkey45]

I suppose this is the place for a thread like this.

Let me begin by throwing out there a HUGE WTF. A few hours ago my mothers cousin, my 2nd cousin, was found with a bullet hole in his head. He was unmarried, in his sixties, both parents had passed away and he was retired with more than enough money having been an weapons system engineer all his life. Alas he was depressed. Tell how life can be so depressing that your willing to take your own? I can't comprehend. I can't understand the why, you have food on the table a roof over your head, friends and family all to resort to. Even if friends and family were amiss, just having food shelter and water at all times, is many times better than what the vast majority of humanity has gone through sine we first walked the Earth, 5k years ago...

It makes me think, if I ever got that damned depressed, depressed to the point that I'd shoot myself, I'd go balls out into the setting sun. Steal a car, travel in a barrel over niagara. Maybe hijack a yacht, load it with cannons and rape and pillage the Caribbean, I'd go out on a bang, a bang beyond the sound of the gun shot anyhow.

Maybe this is just me blabbering because the information is kind of a shock. He was apart of my family, always saw him on holidays although we were never extremely close, it's obviously close enough to hit home. So... how is depression can be such a potent weapon?

Technically we've been walking the earth as humans for 200,000 years. Nevertheless, back to the topic at hand. Suicide (through the extension of depression) is not logical, nor rational. When people commit suicide, they're not usually weighing the pro's and con's of living (which would probably have a monopoly of pro's in that situation), nor are they entirely sane at that moment. I do suffer from seasonal and chronic depression, which is genetic in my family, and I was "relatively" recently in that sort of mind-state.

I can tell you from firsthand experience that suicide and contemplation of suicide is probably atrocious to any one who considers it, and most likely, to those that commit it.



From what I understand, a type of depression kicks in at around 50-60. Retirement is just around the corner, society has geared people to think that they are on the "homestretch of their lives" and that they should take comfort in their family and friends, and then live out their lives relaxing with money. It's almost never that idyllic. Not only that, but if someone has any measure of regret, the depression becomes more absolute.

[Daeger]

I suppose this is the place for a thread like this.

Let me begin by throwing out there a HUGE WTF. A few hours ago my mothers cousin, my 2nd cousin, was found with a bullet hole in his head. He was unmarried, in his sixties, both parents had passed away and he was retired with more than enough money having been an weapons system engineer all his life. Alas he was depressed. Tell how life can be so depressing that your willing to take your own? I can't comprehend. I can't understand the why, you have food on the table a roof over your head, friends and family all to resort to. Even if friends and family were amiss, just having food shelter and water at all times, is many times better than what the vast majority of humanity has gone through sine we first walked the Earth, 5k years ago...

It makes me think, if I ever got that damned depressed, depressed to the point that I'd shoot myself, I'd go balls out into the setting sun. Steal a car, travel in a barrel over niagara. Maybe hijack a yacht, load it with cannons and rape and pillage the Caribbean, I'd go out on a bang, a bang beyond the sound of the gun shot anyhow.

Maybe this is just me blabbering because the information is kind of a shock. He was apart of my family, always saw him on holidays although we were never extremely close, it's obviously close enough to hit home. So... how is depression can be such a potent weapon?

Well... First of all.. I wouldn't rape anyone or go ape all over the world, if was about to go ape all over the place if I was going to kill myself or if I was depressed enough to kill myself. I can't imagine a state of mind when I'd kill myself, because I concider killing myself as giving up. Giving up is something I don't do regarding things like this.

[Yaga Shu Ra]

I'm sorry to hear that.

I advice you to discuss these thoughts and sentiments with your family, and offer them an ear for theirs. Your support to them, and theirs to you, will be of higher value compared to what I can offer.

[JP226]

Its difficult to climb into a person's mind that thinks their life is better off nonexistent.

[Habelo]

Maybe food and shelter isnt the most important here in life? Its more unlikely that we need the pursuit of food and water just as much as we actualy need it physically. Since we are made for this quest of our lives. And if that purpose has been taken from a man, he doesnt have a quest no more, nothing to do. No purpose, why live without purpose?

[JP226]

The point I was making is that life is easy, much easier today, why kill yoursel given tht so many people, so many generations would be willing to risk their lives to attain such a level of existence. Honestly sucide is a very selfish act in my opinon. Which I why I joked that if i'm going to kill myself, make it worth it, hijack a yacht and rape and pillage the caribbean.

[Phier]

The point I was making is that life is easy, much easier today, why kill yoursel given tht so many people, so many generations would be willing to risk their lives to attain such a level of existence. Honestly sucide is a very selfish act in my opinon. Which I why I joked that if i'm going to kill myself, make it worth it, hijack a yacht and rape and pillage the caribbean.

I've never comprehended it either, but think of it this way.

He was unmarried, in his sixties, without immediate family I'd assume.

Life is much more than comfort and what you can do. I could see thinking one day there was nothing TO live for, so why bother?

Added as you can't crawl into his head, who knows what failures and issues he had beyond the surface. Most people are far deeper than we see. Most people have made a lot of mistakes in their lives. Perhaps looking back on his life he saw those mistakes for his loneliness now.

And your rape and pillage joke is just that, why bring suffering to others because you are unhappy?

[Celsius]

Yeah. people, as said in an earlier post, look at the pro's and cons and sometimes,the con's outweigh the pro's I suppose. Perhaps he didnt want to be alone forever and just wanted to do something about. I also am sorry for your loss.

[JP226]

Life is much more than comfort and what you can do. I could see thinking one day there was nothing TO live for, so why bother?

Added as you can't crawl into his head, who knows what failures and issues he had beyond the surface. Most people are far deeper than we see. Most people have made a lot of mistakes in their lives. Perhaps looking back on his life he saw those mistakes for his loneliness now.

And your rape and pillage joke is just that, why bring suffering to others because you are unhappy?

At the extremely shallow end, life is the interaction of chemicals within your own head. How to phrase this, knowing that, why doesn't anyone have the ability to minipulate it in their favor? I'm not the poster child of the perfect life. This guy was in my family for one. Growing up I didn't make the best descisions and I was born with what most would call a silver spoon in thier mouth. I come from a good back ground, but my Parents also went through a bitter divorce that lasted from the time I was nine or 10 to when I was 19 years old because the SOB my Mother married was a god damned con man. Fortunately now they are divorced and he's running from not only the cops but the Cuban mafia and Hells angels. That whole situation caused alot of ing problems in my life from being a dumbass in school to damn near severing my ties with half my family, pushing it to the limits. All because that jerk off thought he was owed millions because he ing "worked" more than most people. PIsses me off even discussing the SOB, much less the fact he had children with my mother. Ok... tangent over.

I just can't understand it I suppose. Not that i've failed to get that point across. The real creepy part is that my 2nd cousins demise has been in the works for the last few weeks apparently. He's set aside what clothes he wishes to be buried in, he's packed his stuff up in his house, furniture and all. Kept his car clean and was considerate enough to execute himself in the back yard as to not make a mess.

[Gelgoog]

I just can't understand it I suppose. Not that i've failed to get that point across. The real creepy part is that my 2nd cousins demise has been in the works for the last few weeks apparently. He's set aside what clothes he wishes to be buried in, he's packed his stuff up in his house, furniture and all. Kept his car clean and was considerate enough to execute himself in the back yard as to not make a mess.

Knowing this he has probably been suicidally depressed for many years. Seeing as how he has no wife or children, he has alot of time to think about this stuff. He probably spent alot of his free time beating himself up in his head (depression does that) and got to the point where he thought it just isnt worth going through the pain anymore. He probably knew that this would hurt his loved ones, but at some point some people just can not do it anymore.

I know depression can seem like a selfish act, but some people have been fighting it all their lives, it interferes with your social life (just try having one with depression) and isolates you from people. Alot of these people suffer from it because they do not want to be selfish and hurt those around them by killing themselves, but there comes a point when you have been suffering for so long, that you become so beat down and numb inside that you have nothing left to fight with...thats when people kill themselves.

[removeduser_487563287433]

I suppose this is the place for a thread like this.

Let me begin by throwing out there a HUGE WTF. A few hours ago my mothers cousin, my 2nd cousin, was found with a bullet hole in his head. He was unmarried, in his sixties, both parents had passed away and he was retired with more than enough money having been an weapons system engineer all his life. Alas he was depressed. Tell how life can be so depressing that your willing to take your own? I can't comprehend. I can't understand the why, you have food on the table a roof over your head, friends and family all to resort to. Even if friends and family were amiss, just having food shelter and water at all times, is many times better than what the vast majority of humanity has gone through sine we first walked the Earth, 5k years ago...

It makes me think, if I ever got that damned depressed, depressed to the point that I'd shoot myself, I'd go balls out into the setting sun. Steal a car, travel in a barrel over niagara. Maybe hijack a yacht, load it with cannons and rape and pillage the Caribbean, I'd go out on a bang, a bang beyond the sound of the gun shot anyhow.

Maybe this is just me blabbering because the information is kind of a shock. He was apart of my family, always saw him on holidays although we were never extremely close, it's obviously close enough to hit home. So... how is depression can be such a potent weapon?

Depression isn't necessarily bad things happen now I'm sad, JP. It's a mental illness.

[boofhead]

Yeah, people suffering from depression have a gloomy tunnel vision that they can't see past. When every day is a misery and there seems to be only one option to escape (as their mind is impairing them from other more fruitful options), then death can appear a welcome relief.

[Taiji]

I think that if life is punishing chemically/emotionally, suicide can seem a good option. If no matter what you do you still feel like you are failing then why bother? ...unless you somehow like unpleasant feelings, e.g. you feel you are being punished but also that you deserve it. Or that you have hope the punishment will end and you will be able to feel rewarded by life if you just wait out the punishment.

Depression is a bugger but it isn't usually fatal.

One perspective on it I've enjoyed is that it is just a stuck focus on the kinesthetic modality. Depressed people are more likely to know how they feel from moment to moment and the simple fact of most people's lives is that feeling is typically uncomfortable. But just like you block out other peoples voices when listening to one, most feelings can be consciously ignored without a problem. The problem is that we don't consciously decide what we consciously ignore and sometimes it may seem like we can't affect it.

[Denny Crane!]

I think that if life is punishing chemically/emotionally, suicide can seem a good option. If no matter what you do you still feel like you are failing then why bother? ...unless you somehow like unpleasant feelings, e.g. you feel you are being punished but also that you deserve it. Or that you have hope the punishment will end and you will be able to feel rewarded by life if you just wait out the punishment.

Depression is a bugger but it isn't usually fatal.

One perspective on it I've enjoyed is that it is just a stuck focus on the kinesthetic modality. Depressed people are more likely to know how they feel from moment to moment and the simple fact of most people's lives is that feeling is typically uncomfortable. But just like you block out other peoples voices when listening to one, most feelings can be consciously ignored without a problem. The problem is that we don't consciously decide what we consciously ignore and sometimes it may seem like we can't affect it.

Yeah I've felt the lure of it, it generally isn't about feeling so much pain it is feeling numb because everything hasn't gone to plan and you feel like you have absolutely no control over your own life. That sometimes the idea of dying while completely illogical and stupid starts seeming attractive, maybe it is because it would be a definitive controlling action rendering your own destiny yours. When you have so many things going on in your head, your unhappy about your past actions and feel like all future ones are going to be the same, well this changes it. I've never gone into a big depressive mania about it, there have just been times I thought it would be easier than trying to change other things. And to be honest it isn't even as though things have ever been that bad.

I'd disagree that depression is an exclusive focus on a kinisthetic modality, it is a powerful subconcious hypnosis commonly people are subconciously running through a series of visual and auditory images and sounds that result in the kinisthetic state, unfortunately all they are aware of is the feelings that are bad. I think it is probably rare for anything to result just from one modality but the end one is the one that everyone will focus on. For me it is a feeling of a lack of control that sparks off a bunch of audio construction, negative self talk about how crap everything is and there is probably a modality happening that I'm not aware of, either an image I create or something I see that sparks it off.

I'm aware of a lot of all of this stuff but powerless to change it, which is the most odd thing. These past few months I've plowed through all sorts of books but knowledge doesn't create change. This ties to what JP said, knowing you have life good doesn't make you feel good.

[boofhead]

And people who think too much wonder why people ''become'' religious as though it's something new.

When all else fails, we have God. He's in our brains. Christian martyrs or modern day muslim suiciders don't just make it up.

He's the meaning of life. When you take away everything from a person and he's left naked in an entrapping concrete cell then divinity makes sense.

How I wish a couple of members of TWC could understand the same. We're all dead, anyway. So LIVE!!!

[scarybandit]

When all else fails, we have God. He's in our brains.

Like morphine.

[Oberbefehlshaber]

Its a chemical imbalance, you dont know the state of his mind.

[Denny Crane!]

Its a chemical imbalance, you dont know the state of his mind.

any empirical evidence for that?

[Oberbefehlshaber]

any empirical evidence for that?

About the chemical imbalance, or him knowing his state of mind? All I know is I was suicidal for about a year, just sick of life and feeling. A year later my opinions about the world have not changed, nothing has changed, however I dont feel suicidal anymore, so evidently it was the serotonin or something in my brain. (never went to a doctor or anything)