Generation Me - or not.
I got the idea from seeing a bit of a documentary about the book, entitled Generation Me: Why Today's Young Americans Are More Confident, Assertive, Entitled - And More Miserable Than Ever.
While watching I found many flaws with the position being supported by the author. Many of the points had other sides to it - not a one way street, as they say. So I felt the urge to respond to it.
I think this blog post covers the points pretty well, so I can dissect them from there.
Ten Characteristics of Generation Me
While expressing yourself is a popular idea today - it must be noted that there is also a strong movement to censor yourself. It is part of the anti-discriminatory, anti-opressive morals being advocated by many these days.1. Generation Direct — On the TV teen soap, The O.C., a father chides his son with “Watch your mouth. I was trying to be polite. You might want to give it a try.” The son’s response? “No thanks. I’d rather be honest.” Being open, almost guileless, is preferred; even if others might interpret it as rudeness. It’s about being true to yourself. Or, as the t-shirts proclaim: It’s all about me. This candour has found a ready outlet in online networks like Facebook where every social and sexual burp in life is readily shared with lots of strangers.
Comments found as defamatory or insulting are highly discouraged, especially if about sex, race, or religion. It is generally frowned upon to discriminate based on those three things, and in work and school, you can get severe punishment for speaking offensively.
Compare today's reactions with the 50s related to using the N word, saying women belong at home, saying Muslims are invading,and calling homosexuals the F word.
It is easy to see that while expressing yourself is encouraged, people are more sensitive to others and actually less likely to be rude in public. The reason for the wave of rudeness on the internet is anonymity and that the people you are speaking to are generally far away. How many people give their whole identity, their home address, and start mouthing off at minorities? Very few, and those who do receive attention because it is uncommon. This is part of people realizing that it is not okay to say everything they think.
Kids are more depressed than ever. School serves to undermine their self esteem - the programs at schools are terrible and achieve nothing. People are still bullied, they still base their self worth on their academic success.2. Generation Self-Esteem — The guilt here lies primarily with the boomers, the folks who enshrined the concept of self-esteem into education and child-raising. Many schools have “specific programs to increase children’s self-esteem, most of which actually build self-importance and narcissism.” Kids need to feel good about themselves. Some educators don’t want to disturb that feeling by actually correcting mistakes in class. Inflated grades and independent spelling are two by-products of the self-esteem movement. When these bump against the reality of quality control at college or on the job, Generation Me is genuinely surprised — and who can blame them?
You write on a computer these days for essays and most projects. Because there is spellcheck and dictionaries, teachers expect you to have perfect spelling and layouts. Students actually feel more hurt from poor spelling than before because they are told they have no excuses.
Not correcting mistakes in class? Hardly. Find me a class where a teacher does not tell you that your answer is wrong. If you give an answer, they'll demand to know the reasoning behind it, and want arguments for it.
And I don't see where the inflated grades idea is from. Average grades in American schools have fallen significantly since the 70s, which is the reason for the No Child Left Behind, and various state-level movements to improve grades.
Narcissism is rare. Every school has loads of overly self-conscious students who feel they aren't good enough in many ways, from grades to self appearance, the latter being a massive influence compared to decades ago thanks to our wonderful media and shows where every man is a muscled war machine, and every woman is skinny, non-sweating model wearing revealing clothing.
Most people don't expect to get a lot right away. People coming from universities actually expect to get very little very slowly - that their dreams will take forever to realize. Only stupid or spoiled people believe they'll get everything in a few years with most jobs.3. Generation Entitlement — The cocoon of self-centredness has left young people feeling that they deserve everything right away. Interns expect positions where they’ll be given plenty of responsibility from the beginning. Earlier this week, a PR agency VP told me about her surprise at the lofty short-term ambitions of some of her staff. It’s tough to manage expectations of employees who have never encountered the quaint concept of ‘paying your dues’.
The feeling that it will take forever to get what you want is part of the rush to high level university programs. It seems like everyone wants to be a doctor, a lawyer, a politician, a scientist, a professor... Because anything less means you'll end up with a shack for a house, no car, and be unable to afford children.
Everything is criticized. At work you can expect to have some creepy manager watching you on a camera and attacking you over every mistake. You expect to get rejected from universities. You underrate your work, and are surprised when you get a 95%. You undervalue your work and expect minimum wage. You feel that you could lose your job at any time.4. Generation Thin-Skin — Generation Me doesn’t respond well to criticism. In many cases, it has never been part of their upbringing. They feel they can’t do wrong. So, when the boss rips into them about a half-effort on the job, they’re devastated. In the past, most people have complimented them on their efforts — no matter how shoddy or lazy those efforts might actually be. (You would think watching Donald Trump and Simon Cowell on reality TV would have prepared them!)
Quite to the contrary, you feel that you could do everything wrong and piss someone off.
Who hasn't been told that they can't do what they want? Not most people.5. Generation Dream-the-Impossible-Dream — “You can be whatever you want to be.” “Never give up on your dream.” “Nothing is impossible.” Coupled with the concept of entitlement, this can be a potent brew. I see it first-hand in applicants who really want to work in public relations but can’t write. No one ever drew the problem to their attention, so they never made much effort to work on it or strengthen it Once again, everything was fine until pesky reality intervened.
Parents expect their kids to get the "best" education possible. Going to a community college to get a job you enjoy? Failure! You have to go to Harvard and get a 400k job! And to get it you have to get straight As in high school. Anything less and you'll be in poverty!
Most people don't think they can do whatever they want. A lot of students think they aren't good enough. They want to get a certain dream job, but....
This has not changed. My parents and everyone else's parents tell of how they were pressured the same way, and instilled with the same belief. My own father is a zealot on this subject - part of the "PhD or else!" gang. As was my grandfather.6. Generation Get-an-Education — There’s more pressure than ever to get a good education. A degree is no guarantee to a career. In fact, that’s why there are so many graduate certificate programs in community colleges. But it’s often still not enough. Generation Me may have learned they can be whatever they want to be, but just what is that exactly? Many agonize over finding the right profession. It’s an agony that prevents them from finding any profession. Of course, there’s always another academic credential and another extended stay at home.
I don't know anyone who expect millions of dollars, or to be an actor or have an exciting job. Everyone I know expects to be bored at work.7. Generation Don’t-Want-To-Be-Bored — Skills help prepare students for the workplace. But what prepares them emotionally? The cult of self-esteem, plus the prevalence of film & TV characters (and the actors themselves!) in exciting jobs, sets Generation Me up for a fall. Job descriptions and salary expectations often can’t match the inspired expectations that have been cultivated.
While teachers are blamed for being bad, the students get a heck of a lot of blame from their parents and teachers. Bad performance is not usually "its your teacher's fault". Rather, its because "You haven't studied." "You didn't study enough." "You didn't do your homework." "You didn't get help." "Its because you wasted time on video games."8. Generation It’s-Not-My-Fault — This starts early when GenMe kids discover how often their shortcomings in school are blamed on their teachers. It’s always external forces at work. And so, the victim mentality is nurtured.
Its called inflation and urban dynamics. My house cost 1/3 less 30-odd years ago. My father's income has increased less than that. But guess what? My house was at the edge of suburbia, away from work, away from malls, away from highways. The population has more than tripled, the area has been flooded with wealthy immigrants, the area is now at the centre of massive urban sprawl.9. Generation Tough-to-Make-a-Living — Yes, the GenMe has high expectations, but some of it is justified. Economically, it’s much harder today to get a career started. Whopping student debts, whopping house prices and whopping child care fees have created hurdles the boomers generally didn’t face. My first house cost two-and-half times my annual salary. How many entry-level practitioners can pull that off today? The pricetag on my first car was 40 per cent of my salary. Again, not so easily done today. We boomers have a tendency to set our own historical measuring sticks up against today’s reality.
Houses in the same position today as mine was 30 years ago cost about the same - 1/3 less than the current price tag. My father could not afford to live in downtown Toronto 30 years ago even with a good paying job.
Yes it has changed, but you must recognize that so has the landscape. I can buy 30 acres of land with a nice house for $210 000 if I go to an area like where my house was 30 years ago. Not here, but the area is not the same at all.
You work toward getting a job by going to school and applying wherever you can.10. Generation Can’t-Change-a-Thing — Here’s where the It’s-All-About-Me-I-Can-Do-Anything syndrome encounters a dichotomy. For all the self-confidence, there is also a cynicism that most things are beyond their control. So, why bother. Why bother to work hard at finding a job; it just comes down to being in the right place at the right time. Why bother to work hard for a promotion; it’s who you know, not what you know. Why bother to vote; my single ballot will influence nothing.
Today's youth are very much of the belief that they CAN change things. Politically active people under 30 is a more recent phenomenon. How often have students petitioned the government, and set up support and advocacy groups? Not before the 70s. If young people today believe they can't change a thing, then why do they create anti-racism, anti-homophobia events and councils at school and abroad, with hundreds of people involved?
Because they believe that they can make a positive difference.
Generation Me does not exist. While there are many people who fit the descriptions, this is a street with many exists, as always.
There is a wide variety of personalities, and it is untruthful to label a whole generation with those nine characteristics (not ten, since #9 really doesn't count) when there is such a large group within the generation who have moved the opposite way.
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Originally Posted by PacSubCom
