Recently, I was walking in a park near my home, enjoying the brisk air of a Canadian winter, and the exquisite beauty of a snow-covered landscape. It was evening and the setting sun stained the white snow with shades of crimson and gold. There wasn't a sound to be had, all was quiet and beautiful, truly serene. But then I did hear something, sounds like shouting and struggling. Naturally concerned, I followed the sounds to behind a small grove of trees, where I saw another young man attempting to force himself upon a young woman, who was against a fence. She naturally took objection to this, and was struggling to push him away, but with his greater strength and size he was easily winning the struggle. I consider myself to be a gentleman, and a gentleman could not stand by and allow this to happen. Moving quickly, I set a hand on the man's shoulder and pulled him away.
"Sir, I don't believe the lady wants your company this evening," I said. The young man shouted a curse word, then drew back and struck me across the jaw, whereupon I struck him back and sent him sprawling onto the cold snowy ground. He looked up at me with anger, pain, and perhaps more than a bit of drunkenness in his eyes, decided that it was not worth the effort, and scrambled off. I then turned to the young woman to see if she was alright.
"Are you okay, miss?" I asked. She did not answer me. Instead she drew a can of pepperspray from her purse and sprayed me with it, shouting "CREEP!" loudly. She then quickly and sharply raised her knee into my reproductive organs, and ran off, leaving me doubled over from the pain which was, i'm sure you know, quite excrutiating.
...and it goes on....