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Thread: I bear witness to the Light of Truth: Worship He who is both King and Kong!!

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  1. #1

    Default I bear witness to the Light of Truth: Worship He who is both King and Kong!!

    Brothers,


    Why do you seek to profit from the world? Why do you bicker over petty doctrinal and philosophical abstracts? Why must we continuously debate over the existence of Richard Dawkins?


    I am not the Light, I only bear witness to the Light. There is one who has come who is far greater than I, the peel of whose banana I am not worthy to pull.


    You must worship the Almighty King Kong~!!


    Dwell in the holy forums, and seek ye the Kingdom of Kong.





    --Father Illuminati
    Last edited by illuminati2025; August 16, 2008 at 01:06 PM.
    I bear witness that there is no God but Kong
    I bear witness that Selenius is the Moderator of Kong
    I bear witness that Stainless Steel is the ViceRegent of Kong
    I bear witness that there is no Kong but Kong

    Link to the Holy Thread

    The True Believers: T-Wester, gr33kp1mp777, Hounf of Culan, Blingerman, izanagi11, Quark, Scivian, y2day, Kbibs89, yelowdogg23, Naked Emperor, Mr. Cursed, Barser, Skooma Addict, The Noble Lord, The Englishman, Finsternis, Spamostoc

    Wanted heretics: Anubis1

  2. #2
    Copperknickers II's Avatar quaeri, si sapis
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    Default Re: I bear witness to the Light of Truth: Worship He who is both King and Kong!!

    Your new religion has more holes in it than a Swiss Cheese after a mafia hit.
    A new mobile phone tower went up in a town in the USA, and the local newspaper asked a number of people what they thought of it. Some said they noticed their cellphone reception was better. Some said they noticed the tower was affecting their health.

    A local administrator was asked to comment. He nodded sagely, and said simply: "Wow. And think about how much more pronounced these effects will be once the tower is actually operational."

  3. #3

    Default Re: I bear witness to the Light of Truth: Worship He who is both King and Kong!!

    Well, he did created Stainless Steel so...

    ALL HAIL THE GREAT KONG! THE KING KONG!
    Member of S.I.N|Patronized by Boeing
    "You cannot convince a man who cannot convince himself that he might be wrong"-Finsternis
    “The great mass of people will more easily fall victim
    to a big lie than to a small one.”
    -Adolf Hitler Mein Kampf(1925)
    "
    There are two kinds of people who don't care about politics: the ones too dumb to care and the ones too smart to care" - Finsternis

  4. #4

    Default Re: I bear witness to the Light of Truth: Worship He who is both King and Kong!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Copperknickers View Post
    Your new religion has more holes in it than a Swiss Cheese after a mafia hit.

    You'll thank me after I convert you.


    Quote Originally Posted by finsternis View Post
    Well, he did created Stainless Steel so...

    ALL HAIL THE GREAT KONG! THE KING KONG!

    Truly, Noble Finsternis, we must spread these foundational truths. For He is both King and Kong. For who can open a door that He shuts?


    Though, I post in this forum to spread the good news: that many who are interested in worldly philosophies and who are steeped in false doctrines may come to the Light of Our Holy Primate King Kong.


    You must only click on the link in my OP, and ask any question to the faithful that you would in the Holy Forum. You will soon join us in the halls of Konghallah, praising the Primate!!


    --Father Illuminati
    I bear witness that there is no God but Kong
    I bear witness that Selenius is the Moderator of Kong
    I bear witness that Stainless Steel is the ViceRegent of Kong
    I bear witness that there is no Kong but Kong

    Link to the Holy Thread

    The True Believers: T-Wester, gr33kp1mp777, Hounf of Culan, Blingerman, izanagi11, Quark, Scivian, y2day, Kbibs89, yelowdogg23, Naked Emperor, Mr. Cursed, Barser, Skooma Addict, The Noble Lord, The Englishman, Finsternis, Spamostoc

    Wanted heretics: Anubis1

  5. #5
    Copperknickers II's Avatar quaeri, si sapis
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    Default Re: I bear witness to the Light of Truth: Worship He who is both King and Kong!!

    Sorry, but i am a die hard Dots worshipper.

    A new wave is coming, one where history is taken by the neck and poured into a mod, all will fall before its might, and none can stand before its mighty 6 new factions, new map, and all round awesomnity, for even the Divine EB will ultimately bow before Hross, the Lord of Horses and total war players alike. Hail dots!
    A new mobile phone tower went up in a town in the USA, and the local newspaper asked a number of people what they thought of it. Some said they noticed their cellphone reception was better. Some said they noticed the tower was affecting their health.

    A local administrator was asked to comment. He nodded sagely, and said simply: "Wow. And think about how much more pronounced these effects will be once the tower is actually operational."

  6. #6
    Lord Anubis's Avatar Senator
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    Default Re: I bear witness to the Light of Truth: Worship He who is both King and Kong!!

    You just had to bring this here didn't you?
    Quote Originally Posted by mishkin View Post
    I want to read Akar´s LOTR synopsis.
    Quote Originally Posted by Akar View Post
    A wizard and a bloodshot floating eye attempt to begin an age of industry and progress and to rescue the oppressed minority of the goblins/orcs/trolls from the racist human/elf alliance.

  7. #7
    Georgy Zhukov's Avatar Primicerius
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    Default Re: I bear witness to the Light of Truth: Worship He who is both King and Kong!!

    Im sorry Im a follower of the flying spaghetti monster.

    That or the great goose where Im considered an arch bishop of the His holiness the Goose, and his wife Hari's Mom.

  8. #8
    Holger Danske's Avatar Comes Limitis
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    Default Re: I bear witness to the Light of Truth: Worship He who is both King and Kong!!

    So where are the horses, the swords, and the shields so we can go conquering the world, already?
    Btw, can I eat pork, drink beer, and enjoy the company of women in this religion of yours?

  9. #9
    Kiljan Arslan's Avatar Comes Rei Militaris
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    Default Re: I bear witness to the Light of Truth: Worship He who is both King and Kong!!

    Begone Heathen! Fallow the light of Eris as set out in the Principa Discordia!
    according to exarch I am like
    Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 
    Quote Originally Posted by Exarch View Post
    sure, the way fred phelps finds christianity too optimistic?

    Simple truths
    Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 
    Did you know being born into wealth or marrying into wealth really shows you never did anything to earn it?
    btw having a sig telling people not to report you is hilarious.

  10. #10

    Default Re: I bear witness to the Light of Truth: Worship He who is both King and Kong!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Anubis1 View Post
    You just had to bring this here didn't you?

    No heresy can hide, nowhere is safe for the blasphemer. For the Light of Steel and the gaze of The Kong shall dispel all darkness.


    Quote Originally Posted by The Guide View Post
    Im sorry Im a follower of the flying spaghetti monster.

    That or the great goose where Im considered an arch bishop of the His holiness the Goose, and his wife Hari's Mom.

    Your so-called 'deity' is nothing more than a corrupt pasta, a disgrace to all that is banana-like. He is not even real, and only an abstraction! Who has ever seen such a despicable idol? Away! Seek you the Kingdom of Kong, and pray that the Holy Primate may forgive your heresy even now.


    Quote Originally Posted by Holger Danske View Post
    So where are the horses, the swords, and the shields so we can go conquering the world, already?
    Btw, can I eat pork, drink beer, and enjoy the company of women in this religion of yours?

    Lord Kong is an omnivore, and so we delight in consuming all sorts of food and drink in the true path.


    As for the company of women, I offer you not tramps, temple prostitutes, or Paris Hilton. Nay: I freely give the Kompanions of Konghallah to any who seek the Primate. Praise His Fur!


    --Father Illuminati
    I bear witness that there is no God but Kong
    I bear witness that Selenius is the Moderator of Kong
    I bear witness that Stainless Steel is the ViceRegent of Kong
    I bear witness that there is no Kong but Kong

    Link to the Holy Thread

    The True Believers: T-Wester, gr33kp1mp777, Hounf of Culan, Blingerman, izanagi11, Quark, Scivian, y2day, Kbibs89, yelowdogg23, Naked Emperor, Mr. Cursed, Barser, Skooma Addict, The Noble Lord, The Englishman, Finsternis, Spamostoc

    Wanted heretics: Anubis1

  11. #11
    Farnan's Avatar Saviors of the Japanese
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    Default Re: I bear witness to the Light of Truth: Worship He who is both King and Kong!!

    Keep this in the Stainless Steel Forums.

    Closed.
    “The nation that will insist upon drawing a broad line of demarcation between the fighting man and the thinking man is liable to find its fighting done by fools and its thinking by cowards.”

    —Sir William Francis Butler

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