AAR-MEN-NIEN

**LlamaD** · February 21, 2008, 08:26 AM

Hey there Delilah !

Actually, my first AARstory, give it a chance.
I recommend colors for better structure or at least some kind of eyecancer
red = songtext quoted stuff affilliated with a deeper meaning on an actual situation ( it was just a Twist in my sobriety ) with a link => use by rightclick and open in new tab
green = comment from the author regarding gameplay and technical items and from everyone else who is capable of getting the difference
blue = thoughts of the protagonists, or whom?

Settings:
DLV 5.2 + unique kings + extra crusade/jihad targets
Difficulty VH/VH I personally have always chosen vh/m before, because afaik on m there is no bonus or malus on the battlefield for both, the player and the ai ... i just don't see the sense in giving the cpu advantages which it should not need, whould it been programmed properly. but because it's common sense that anything other than vh/vh is cheating, i'll give it a try

Size Huge

No other extra Changes pregame.

Beside that, there are some restrictions alongside with some freedom that i use for the journey:
No adoptions
No Alliances with Turks or other Muslim Factions ( except maybe the Mongols for historic reasons )
No merchant camps Seminar 34. "How to cut off the competition in the Timber-market : Useful animals and tinktures "
No conversion processions simply because noone will be able to speak the armenien names correctly when its more than ONE
or cause the priests cant stand each other and would hate to be the twentyfirst one to knock on the door and start like " Why the orthodox way is the better way to heaven "

I do will use cheap and even cheaper tactics to overcome all obstacles
But i do will also bind them into the storyline and make them seem natural - thats the tougher part of it. Like, say, make the papacy allied with the Aztecs just in order to export the pope to america.

Some kind of music-interference.
->
An add-on here and there in German -> this one could be quite odd, but i just makes sense because of the lyrics do fit well within the game scene and the language.
If u like to understand, there are always ways to learn and get a clue. if not, then not. U are still free to open your mouth and tell me ich find dich scheisse.

Beside some minor tweakings in storytelling, the surrounding cast will get a more intense involvement.

Basically, two or more of them will have a conversation ( or two ) about god, the world and why the beer is so thin nowadays.

Hope u enjoy! And i don't forget to do/post it ...

Disclaimer

Links to youtube, pictures, lines and text are heavily offending, containing blood, violence, gore, explicit content and are not permitted to be explored by people that are below 120 years of age and did not start smoking after the birth of their great-grandchild.

Description

I choose Armenien, as an orthodox Faction capable of just hiding in the mountains, already experienced in the art of losing the wealth when the armies march through your country since .... ever? yesterday....while during the same time they appear to be heavily supporters of the christian armies!
The days of great Armenien glory are long forgotten, like the extension under Tigranes the Great back in the days before christus.

In Fact, our main lands are occupied by seldjuks and many armeniens are forced to look for other places to live.
Beside that, everything is fine, we're proud owner of intrigues, assassination, internal fights for power etc..

To escape death or servitude at the hands of those who had assassinated his relative, Gagik II, King of Ani, an Armenian named Roupen with some of his countrymen went into the gorges of the Taurus Mountains and then into Tarsus of Cilicia. Here the Byzantine governor of the place gave them shelter. Thus, from around 1080 to 1375, the focus of Armenian nationalism moved south, as the Armenian Kingdom of Cilicia.

As the first christian state of the world, largely thanks to St. Gregory the Illuminator, there's something to defend.

With control of the trade, a strong kingdom could evolve..like it did in history. Diplomacy is also a strong key to survive in an "freindly" environment. no typo - a quote

Little Armenia, also known as lesser Armenia might be weak but is hungry and so will i.... play them (weak) and eating... hoping not to vomit..
Imo, Major Powers are mostly too wide spread - its too hard to get personal with 20 different generals, 30 diplomats, 40 provinces, 50 spies and 60 priests.
Important to mention : i have till today never played DLV further then 20 make that 40 turns , so i might be annihilated before 1220 as well as surpass my mission in 40 turns... Anything can happen.
I will though act accordingly to logic and some historical framesets.
The Campaign Mission goal is long: 25 provinces and holding Adana, Sis and Antioch.
Why? - Because I do not like to see having "Exterminate all the Turks today"-lines on the daily checkbox.

Moving forward i have a task, worthy of only the mightiest of generals.. err, Forum Users.
To make comment, show appreciation or hatred, please use the voices and/or pictures of the supporting cast

for example :

: You shall suffer the hudud for your impertinence, infidel!

or

These newcomers cant even piss straightforward, i really miss the old times when 10 consecutive bloody paintings counted already as a good story..

alright, next post to start..

Argh, still inhabitants in here ? MOVE OUT, this place is occupied by now for the soldiers of our mighty Arqa Rouben! By the way, dont forget to hand me over the key for your daughters chastity belts...

Ps: I've experienced that imageshack is not reliable. Whenever you see a picture missing in any post, pls report to me per pm. thanks.

**LlamaD** · February 21, 2008, 08:28 AM

Index of Content

Act I - Land of Confusion

- Land of Confusion
- Urgent
- It's been a hard days (k)night
- Trustmarriage
- One of a kind
- Fama(ousdis)gusta
- Shipdumping
- Rebel Yell
- Spoiled
- Give and take
- Keep your Dream and gimme the money
- Colossus claimings
- The good, the bad and the ugly
- Money Money Money
- Disappear
- What you gonna do?
- Mo'Money
- Access denied
- Maul Halt
- On the road again(st)
- One step (c)loser
- Point of no return
- End of all Peace

Interlude
- Interview with a ~~vampire~~ Ghostwriter

Act II - It's too late

- It's too late
- I am the last..
- Run for..
- Hang on
- Martyrs
- Talk to the hand
- One thing
- One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest
- Knocking on Tyrant's door
- Florins duel
- Repeat please
- Nu schit
- Activation
- Lets go! (They do not move.)
- Handwashing
- Second Life lost.
- Talking Coins
- 'Ar Queen
- Another one bites the dust
- Trap encountered
- Walking tall
- Prepare or dare
- A tale of two halves
- Build me up before you go-go
- Saint Jude
- Enemy mine
- The Secret of Cakmak - Thanks to PowerWizard
- Propaganda - ... the Guest, not Ghost
- Middle Left Right
- Dirty deeds - .... writer
- Hold it, hold it... HOLD IT!
- Any minute now
- Face the coin(cidence)
- Sandcastles - ..for the...
- Lair or Liar?
- The Saints
- Where do you lead me?
- "No need to not fear - the Underdog is here!" - And some peanuts...
- Switching and itching
- Cakmak is crowned - ...really original title...
- Sweet children and violent pastoralists
- And i see you standing there
- The law
- Hard day, yes it has been a hard day
- More chestwarming...treatment (mainly spelling).
- Know your daddy
- Moving squatters inside out
- Free(d)anger
- Successfully scared away
- Checkers

Interlude 2nd

- The published Interview

Act III - Close the circle

-Close the Circle
-He's just the same
-Clever Princes
-Make War, not Love
-Mercy
-Knaves-applied, God-approved.
-Sucettes
-Cross the Bride.
-Silly Rumours

The links are for each posting seperately. However, if you don't read from the beginning to the end
losers lose, winners win
this is real, we ain't got to pretend...
The cold world that we in
It's full of pressure and pain
Enough of me slave now listen to (the ) Game
.....
err... you might miss something. Several somethings. Basically, you might not understand anything.

Ok. Fine.

So now it's time to battle the disobedient readers ...and writing stuff!

Todo: play the game further (1265) v |link content with index v| i know few read this, but how ~~impossible~~ hard is it to actually roleplay in an roleplaying AAR for an roleplaying MOD ?

To say it with the words of alltime-high Josh Howard: " Crazy, man. Y'all hilarious."

Meanwhile i put up the open storylines, just to remember myself.
I mean, i don't get new customers, they are basicially the same dirty dozen as three month ago. And they jump straight to the last page. They don't check the 2nd post (ever :p ) .
So there's no danger that anyone sees this and decides to actually work something out with this knowledge that would put me up to the task of interacting. That would ultimately reduce time between updates. Horrible thought.
Phew.

Spoiler Alert, click show to read:

ps:
Hail to Furin. (knees and prays.)
Bless you! to Xtiaan72
Shoutouts to Darkan, the not so faithful Servant yet even moreso amiable reader.
Tap on the shoulder to Aeon`
A hungry dog for ivanhoex
King's Eyes to PowerWizard
Mandylion for Blackleaf-Willie
pps:

**LlamaD** · February 21, 2008, 08:35 AM

1180

Kilikian Armenia, also known as Lesser Armenia also known as Little Armenia also known as Armenia. Now that is astonishing

Rough times lie beyond and ahead the Arqa Rouben.

Once a formidable Fighter on the battlefield, he is now feeling the age coming and has to pay his tribute. Kingdom is short on Leaders, only his one and only son, Arqayazn Arsen could fill in this role.

Bad economy, trouble with religious issues, almost surrounded by the seldjuks that are also occupieng the homelands, weak on allies and troops as much as authority among the armenian nobles, the Arqa has to act real sneaky to survive.

Fortunately, the Armenian Kingdom has a strong navy fleet,

commanded by the savvy

Unfortunatly, since they demand to be made only of wood from a cypress, they costs to keep the fleet are way to expansive. So to speak, Ashot gets adressed to "solve" this little problem. Shortly thereafter, 2 of his brothers are commanded to take one ship each and explore the coasts near and far away. Gagos, the younger one, sails straight to egypt, just to find out he cant understand any word they speak down there. His Brother Gostig on the other hand was lucky enough to catch the byzantine fleet nearby cyprus.

After some weeks, Ashot reported the armenian navy ready to sail with one ship total. Why only one ? Well, one third of the royal fleet hit a rock down in egypt waters, and another third was ominously captured by a marauding pirate merchant.

I guess Admiral Gostig wasn't that lucky

Meanwhile, the other 4 corners

of Arqa's power certainly weren't idle.

Beautiful well, kinda Princess Beatrice was sent straightaway to establish an alliance with the longterm friendandfoe Byzanz. At least they pray to the same gods...err, god.

Incredibly skilled diplomate Gagik gaze of persuasion, perhaps, beside the fact that he was the only one capable of writing and reading,traveled south to make arrangements with the Crusader states.

The royal spy Bedros Amatuni was ordered to make sure where the borders to our next enemy were and faithful Bishop Atrnerseh was just about to teach the citizen of Adana the right way as he found out that way too many islamic women seized the country to get overwhelmed in religious discussions at the doorstep. Especially by someone having a hard time spelling his own name.

Nevertheless, Arqa Rouben ordered his son Arsen to meet him at Capitol Adana, to speak with him about "urgent" issues.

**LlamaD** · February 21, 2008, 08:39 AM

: "Son, i'm glad you made it to the meeting. It might surprise you a little bit why i am here outside the town halfway to you, but we are short on time. So, listen carefully what you've got to know.
First and foremost, I am forced to step down from the military command. The Cities well, actually THE City need my governance. That means you have to lead our armenian troops to glory and victory. I am sure you will become one of the best Generals a simple Arqa like me can wish for as to be his son, therefore and in case that if not....those banners are very nice, aren't they ? "

:"As you wish, my Arqa. I'm ready for any challenge to avoid ."

:" Well, well. As a sign of honour i assign you a sign of assign...arrr....i mean i transfer my personal Quartermaster to your entourage. He will be helpful to make campment in high quality beds never empty of livestock.. Take good care of him. He never entered battlefield without a bed. Or was it bedled fled from battle ? I just don't remember... Bad bedbattles ..*sigh*"

:" "How grateful my liege. He will be a perfect fit alongside my Drillmaster. This one has been too long away from man with any kind of behaviour other than raw and crude ones. Anything else i shall know ? "

:" Indeed, some small things remain. Beware of the Seldjuks. They still oppress our native homelands and seem to look already at a chance to exterminate us all ! Never trust anyone of 'em. Make sure we're preparred for the time they choose to attack us. Right now we're so badly outnumbered, they wouldn't need time to count us out...if they could count..Our Finances are almost in bad shape as our military situation...
Arrr... whatta mess.

It's a Land of Confusion

Land of Confusion

I must have dreamed a thousand dreams

Been haunted by a million screams

But I can hear the marching feet (ah)
They're moving into the street (ah)

Now, did you heard the news today?
They say the danger has gone away
But I can see the fire's still alight
They're burning into the night (ah)

There's too many men, too many people
Making too many problems

And there's not much love to go around

Can't you see this is the land of confusion? (ah, ah, ah, ah)

This is the world we live in (whohoho)
And these are the hands we're given (whohoho)
Use them and let's start trying (whohoho)
To make it a place worth living in

Oh, Tigranes, where are you now?
When everything's gone wrong somehow?
The men of steel (ah), these men of power

Are losing control by the hour

This is the time, this is the place
So we look for the future

But there's not much love to go around

Tell me why this is the land of confusion(ah, ah, ah, ah)

This is the world we live in
And these are the hands we're given(whohoho)
Use them and let's start trying(whohoho)
To make it a place worth living in(whohoho)

I remember long ago
When the sun was shining
And all the stars were bright all through the night
In the wake of this madness, as I held you tight

So long ago

I won't be coming home tonight
My generation will put it right
We're not just making promises

That we know we'll never keep

There's too many men, too many people
Making too many problems

And there's not much love to go round

Can't you see this is the land of confusion? (ah, ah, ah, ah)

{ALL}
Now, this is the world we live in (whohoho)
And these are the hands we're given (whohoho)

Use them and let's start trying (whohoho)
To make it a place worth fighting for

This is the world we live in (whohoho)

And these are the names we're given (whohohoho)

Stand up and let's start showing (whohoho)

Just where our lives are going to (ah, ah, ah, ah)

Meanwhile i sent Diplomates to the Crusader States in order to achieve some Alliances..aswell as your Sister to do the same with Byzanz. Don't look so surprised. In fact, there is a real surprise left. Word spread around someone's chasing you for your claim to the crown as a faction heir. Look, he's right behind yourself. I Guess you should take care of him. Send after me if you need my assistance, but i'm busy right now because my leaving Quartermaster had a last gift for me. For ..let's say.. 2 hours. For intelligence report, ask our royal spy."

Left alone, our young Arqayazn grumbles....

:" This one's pissing me off. He gives a **** literally and i have to do the dirty work. I wonder if ...nevermind. BEDROOOOS!

:"Yessss my Lord! As you can see, i've just returned from an oberservation mission to scout the enemy. Basically, they are just Peasents, except for 2 squadrons of Heavy Cavalry...some footmen, some archers.. led by your Uncle Dertad."

:" My WHAT?!?"

: "You should concern to take a closer look to your family history when you get a chance, my Lord...or if."
Said and disappeared.

Not far away and shortly thereafter....

:" So you are the new one? Better be in shape, we seem to be having a nice little clash within the nearest time."

:" And you must be the Father of half these people you might call "army" with both eyes closed. Are we even supposed to win the oncoming battle ? How comes that its always ME who happens to fail to meet someone appreciating my work ? ...*grumble*

**LlamaD** · February 21, 2008, 08:51 AM

After a bloody battle and slaying his relative, a dark and dreadful knight approaches young Arqayazn Arsen

stating : " From now on until the end of your time, i follow you."

: " Aehm...if you say so...."

Meanwhile, a messenger arrives.
"Dear Arqayazn, you are ordered to conquer Famagusta. 10000 Florins reward. Farewell."

:"Me and what army ? There's not a single healthy man left in the hole kingdom!"

Messenger:" Well, then i guess you have to blend them with the Power of the kilikian sun...."

PS: If i continue this slow style, i might have 50 posts before turn 50 in 2009 - although i did some prewriting and just spam-a-lot right now

**LlamaD** · February 21, 2008, 12:30 PM

1182

...
Venetians are massacred during a riot ( latin pogrom) in Constantinople.
...

And now, somewhere completly different...

: " Not again..didn't i had to suffer enough from those turkish princess visit last year?.......err.... WELCOME, young Princess of Armenia. How can u help me.....i mean how can I serve you ?"

: " My people wish to bind our nations closer together. They even adjusted the bride price to your financial needs....called a Trustmarriage...i dont know what that means... but listen, i was on the road for half a year and i want a bed right now! "

: " Uh, oh... what did dad say? " when in doubt or questioned by a woman, move in and look like in pain " ..OK"

: " Wonderful! You are MEIN KAISAR! "

As word of the glory marriage reached the Royal Family, the princess's mother, Aghavni seemed to be allowed to die in peace, knowing her daughter made her country proud. And so she did. At least, she thought so.

This incident left the kingdom in an iffy situation. Byzanz was now claiming a right of succession to the throne. Dangerous times for Arqayazn Arsen. Better start watching out for some purple dressed men with sharp knives in their hand, mumbling " take me to your ruler".. no, not that straightedge!@%§$$"
To make matters worse, he didn't even know that. Instead, he was on his way to Famagusta, shipping all the way along with good old Admiral Ashot.

GERMAN

1183

Just moments after his arrival on cypric ground...

: " Ashot u masterpiece of a Navigator....this is THE WRONG side of the island...we have to sail half the way back..no, u have to paddle the way back!!...
Hold on a second! Who is that girl ? "

"What did dad say?..."

**repman** · February 21, 2008, 01:07 PM

a funny AAR...

repman

**Xtiaan72** · February 21, 2008, 10:23 PM

Definitely the first time I have seen a Genesis song in an AAR.... Very cool. If you cover the whole campaign like this it could be a novel! + Rep!

**LlamaD** · February 22, 2008, 05:34 AM

Something is rotten in the state of Den..err this thread.

: *sigh* I knew it's not that easy to figure it out, but i'll try it a last time with kind words giving you a clue, young reader at home.

Student, you received the great honor of making a worthy contribution to the world. Especially, my world. Now, would you be so delightful and follow the court rules?

Still clueless people revisit the first post, last paragraph Pleeeeeeeeeeease

**repman** · March 06, 2008, 03:14 PM

more Hägar pics ...

repman

**LlamaD** · March 06, 2008, 03:53 PM

Well, i don't know... is that stating the fact that is, or a demand... anyway, if you want some, you have to ask some...but the right way. I officially give up the idea that someone understood what i meant in the first place. Alright, here's ONE way to demand more haegar pics

My Friend, my kingdom and our people truly enjoy the intermissions of your story by the big, fat norsemen. Increase their amount and our joys will be endless! ............................... Don't and your pain will be.

That's one way. another would be

HEY, you maggot! Bring me some more comics or you'll clean up the battlefield with your tooth and hair!! since we got no toothbrush anyway..

..and so on. understand? no? exactly... so in simple words, just use some entourage images /roles to play... to...you know... roleplaying? got it? really? well, we'll see. *thumbscrossed*

**LlamaD** · March 27, 2008, 03:22 AM

1198

Ah, finally, one good news from the always troubled armenian navy.

On a second thought, is it really that good ?

Concerned by the taxes, the common people are really becoming proactive.
German

Traveling around in Italy, her Highspeedingness , Princess Batara achieves an Alliance with the pope....and one with Sicily. Two flies in one try! Not bad, not bad.

With the always decreasing treasury, every market raise is welcomed.

Of course, the kingdom can't afford to let proactive taxpayers succeed at all....
German

At the city of Sisterly Love:

: Ah, son, you made it.*spew*

: And you, my father, almost, too.

: I'm not dead yet!...*cough*.. but i heard you had some heroic victories out there and gathered regions for the kingdom. There's only one thing i want you to promise..*puke*.... [...] i want you to make sure that my bones rest at the place of my ancestors one day, at feet of the holy mount ararat.*semiconscious*
[silence] [...]
..*choke* Oh, and keep the taxes up! I was told there's even room for raising.... *unconscious*

: There you go, old man.

Minutes later...

: *hasty* Feared Arqayazn! An infamous Betrayel! Byzanz besieges our Town!

Well, so much for being married with the Basileus gets our two nations bonded closer together.

: What? We gave 'em almost no reason for an attack and had overall outstanding relations!

Click to view content:

: What in the world is going on !?

: Do you really wanna know? WAR!

: Haha, almost funny, Messenger. Bye the way, how did you get yourself a recognizable face? I remember you just as a scheme...

: Oh, it's really tough to get a reliability certification nowadays..

: I see. Now go and bring bad news to someone else before i reconsider this and decide to behead you.

End of Act I

It is the End of all hope.

To lose the child, the faith

To end all the innocence
To be someone like me

This is the birth of all hope
To have what I once had

This life unforgiven

It will end with birth

No will to wake for this morn
To see another black rose born
Deathbed is slowly covered with snow

Angels, they fell first but I'm still here
Alone as they are drawing near
In heaven my masterpiece will finally be sung

It is the end of all hope

To lose the child, the faith

To end all the innocence
To be someone like me

This is the birth of all hope
To have what I once had

This life unforgiven

It will end with birth

Wounded is the deer that leaps highest
And my wound it cuts so deep
Turn off the light and let me pull the plug

It is the end of all hope

To lose the child, the faith

To end all the innocence
To be someone like me

This is the birth of all hope
To have what I once had

This life unforgiven

It will end with birth

Click to view content:

Mandylion without a face

Deathwish without a prayer

End of hope

End of love

End of time

The rest is silence

Mandylion without a face

Deathwish without a prayer

End of hope

End of love

End of time

The rest is silence

It is the end of all hope

To lose the child, the faith

To end all the innocence
To be someone like me

This is the birth of all hope
To have what I once had

This life unforgiven

It will end with birth

this is the birth of all hope
to have what I once had

It is the end of all hope

To lose the child, the faith

To end all the innocence
To be someone like me

This is the birth of all hope
To have what I once had

This life unforgiven

It will end with birth

It is the end of all hope

To lose the child, the faith

END OF ALL HOPE!

**Furin** · March 27, 2008, 12:38 PM

mysteriously...

Spoiler Alert, click show to read:

**LlamaD** · March 29, 2008, 02:29 PM

Interview with a ~~vampire~~ Ghostwriter

: *eager*54, 55, 56...At least it will make up a good story...

: *winded* 123, 124, 125...He must have some good knees.

: *tired* 294, 295 ...i hate him..

: *exhausted* 452, 452, 452.. MUST ..GO...UP ..453..

: *totally exhausted* 598,...599..600..aaah.. *slams door open*

: Ah, welcome, i expected you for a long time.To be precise, 2 hours since you entered the lower door.

: WATER!...*collapsing*

: No condition whatsoever..*tsts*..alright then.*pours a bucket with a liquid over the foreigners head*

10 Minutes later..

: *awakening*...Uff...I have to say, it's a very fine tower in which you're living.

: It is indeed. And it was reasonably priced...the previous owner had to leave due to buisiness oversea..

: I was being sarcastic. Nevermind... I'm here to do an interview....with you, i suppose?

: That is correct.

: Let's start immediately. You are the writer of this story and these... manuscripts?

: I am...let's say i am a ghostwriter.

: A ghostwriter?!? What does that mean?

: Well, i tell you this: Since i've started, over thousand people dropped by, grabbed my manuscripts and...said nothing! As if they aren't alive! Like...ghosts. I write for ghosts.

: Uhm, but you got some responses, didn't you ?

: Half a dozen... but i had troubles recognizing most of them at all. I'm old, you know, my ears let go, my eyes long before... so it's no fun. And they use slang all the time. Why in the world can't they speak clearly!? There's only one good among them, a glorious knight named Furin. But the poorly rest...*thumb down*

: What are you doing about that?

: I'm already looking for the the right kind of punishment. I'm in negotiations with Heino, D. Küblböck, Faith Hill, Paris H. The Spice Girls, and two or three muezzins. I can't decide who has the most thrilling voice yet.

: Isn't that a bit harsh? And speaking of your implementation of music, do you really think anyone hears and reads it at the same time ?

: Actually, it's just what they deserve. And i like the thought of people doing as ordered, yes. Although i bet only one out of ten might recognize that there are more than one videolinks to the songs. Heck, sometimes i'm willed to give 'em Piffpaffpuff Daddy or worse, Celine Dion.

: What a cruel man. Let's change topic.. I've noticed you are using Hagar pictures. Isn't it a bit odd to use a norwegian lout in an armenian story? Won't he fit better in an Norwegian AAR?

: No, not at all. Hagar has a legitmate residence permit. He's just a guest worker. Oh, and the Norwegians don't have that kind of funny names..so.

: But he is almost the lone reason people are coming here.

: Be careful what you say. This is not an HagAAR! If i would make an HagAAR, it would be just like:

Spoiler Alert, click show to read:

: But i'm not going to do it. So you better accept that!

: *suddenly scared* Is that....is that a human skeleton back there in the cave ?

: Err....no..it's...ehm...it's the skeleton of an...an.. ape, yes.. an ape! I tested the latest Britney album on him. Unfortunately, he didn't made it through the process.

: *spooked* Ok then..back to Hagar...why are you using german strips?

: I take what's available. If there would be the same strips in english available, i'd take them. By the way, you don't need your horse anymore, right? Fine.

: Don't you think you're actions are offending to some people?

: Oh, i am sure they are. This recent letter from the jewish council of suitability confirms that. They complain that they only banned converted women, not men. Whatever.

: And other than the jews ?

: Well, i feel secure. Have you read the disclaimer? I'm conviced i can take on these old fellas if they feel hurt.

: Oh...Ok. What else....ah, yes, there are several disturbing facts and points in your story. Can you explain them to me and my readers?

: Yes, but hurry up. Sun is coming up soon...i get tired. Only five more questions!

: D'accord. When the Arqayazn besieged Attalia, what exactly did he again ?

: He just did what he always does. He lured the garrison out of town.

: But how ?

: *sigh* Ok, listen. He makes his way to the gates and then..

Click to view content:

:..Then he plays a round of insult swordfighting with them. He never loses, though. Then they freak out and try to hunt him down and leave the save walls. He's a real Agitator, you know ?

Click to view content:

: Ay.. I don't know what to say....

: Then you better keep asking!

: What about the Taoist?

: He is under deck until further notice. Not that i would try to make this an Armenian Ghost Story. Noooooo. Next question!

: What's up with this mysterious Owl?

: *sigh* No imagination whatsoever, hum? The pagan magician brought it with him. Remember where he was picked up ? Go figure.

: And where is Ater...Atreh...Atrehner..the Bishop?

: Well, he is currently in a secret training camp.

: What kind of training camp?

: You already had your five questions...

: What? I...

: Stop wasting precious air. Apparently, interviewing isn't you primary job, right? Right. I know it's tough to get over the hump these days, but you should choose your second job a bit more carefully! Anyways, Goodnight.

: ....Thats enough, i quit. Have a nice day, er, night! *leaves angered, slams door*

Downstairs

: Unbelievable.... who does he think he is?
...

: Precious air... it smelled rotten up there!
...

: I will give it to him ! *threating voice*

1 hour later

: *looking back up outside* Thou shall not be getting away with this! *wagging*

: *looking down from upside* And for that guy i had to pay them 1000 florins. Sick. Next time they send me a peasant or what?! *moves back into the libary*

**TheG** · March 31, 2008, 03:06 AM

Nice AAR

**Pelican Man** · March 31, 2008, 12:45 PM

Originally Posted by LlamaD

...i hate him..

That made my day... My boss seen me laughing out loud, so i got in trouble. It was worth it. lol

THE P-MAN

P.S.

KEEP IT COMING!

**LlamaD** · March 31, 2008, 02:26 PM

Originally Posted by TheG

Nice AAR

: What is this? Last time i checke, April fools' day was tomorrow, right? What kind of people drops by and mumbles anything incomprehensible before leaving after two seconds?

: Do you really wanna know ? It's TheG!

: The what?

: TheG!

: You're sure thats no typo? It could be ThuG or something...

: Almost sure...

: Can anyone tell me what is wrong with these people!??!?

: He must be deaf. Otherwise i wouldn't have to tell everything more than once!

: No, he has to be dumb /shtum, cause he could not speak...

: If he heard you singing, he would beg to be dumb...

: I'd say he is blind because he can't read how to act....

: Someone has to redeem him from his poor Peasant life... May I ?

: Breaking news! My sources say that this ain't the first time he's done such things.

Click to view content:

: A habitual linestepper then, hum?

: Maybe he's just saying what's true ?

: Nonsense! This peasant does not even own a horse! Much less a stirrup! How could he ever dare?

Spoiler Alert, click show to read:

: That makes sense.

---------

Originally Posted by Pelican Man

That made my day... My boss seen me laughing out loud, so i got in trouble. It was worth it. lol

THE P-MAN

P.S.

KEEP IT COMING!

: Sometimes i wonder why there are disclaimers ...

: Hey it is very possible that he still has to work! Pension and retirement aren't the same since i was young...

: Ok, but then, how old has to be his boss?

: Given the fact that i was promoted one rank every 10 years....and i am now 90 and a Sergeant Major...

: You silly old pals are both missing the point!
I can't hear anything! That equals nothing said.
Enough of this. Pleaaase.

**LlamaD** · March 31, 2008, 02:28 PM

1199

The foreign merchants in Armenia hardly get a rest.

Ah, thank goodness, the crusade is done, we can go home...these armenian 98% trade taxes are ridiculous! ..What?.. A new Jihad? We have to go back to Armenia?!? We're getting ripped!

Neither do the taxpayers.

Princess Batara has a somewhat difficult decision to make.

: Sure, i would need some Arshmuni. How pervert are these nobles !? Screw yourself, pigeons!

Surprise, Surprise! The Byzanzinos lift the Siege.

The first thought that comes to mind..

...is sadly not for real.

The still Arqayazn is not amused and lets the diplomat know it.

Click to view content:

Apologize

It's too late too apologize

eh eh eh
eh eh eh

I'm hangin on your rope
got me ten feet off the ground

I'm hearin what you say but

I just can't make a sound

You tell me that you need me

-then you go and cut me down

But wait
You tell me that you're sorry
Didn't think I'd turn around and say

That it's too late to apologize, it's too late

eh eh eh

I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late

eh eh eh
oh yeahhh, ooohh
eh eh eh

I'd take another chance, take a fall,

take a shot for you ooohhh

And I need you like a heart needs a beat

But that's nothing new yaaeeahh

I loved you with a fire red

Now it's turning blue
And you say

Sorry like the angel heaven let me think was you

But I'm afraid

It's too late to apologize, it's too late

eh eh eh

I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late

eh eh eh
ooohh
eh eh eh
eh eh eh

It's too late to apologize, it's too late

eh eh eh
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late

eh eh eh ooohhh

I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late

eyyyeeeaaahhh

I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late

eyyyeeeaaahhh

I'm hangin on your rope
Got me ten feet ooofff the ground

**TheG** · April 01, 2008, 02:44 AM

I bring dire news my liege. Someone has just realized our concept. With this knowledge there is no telling what he can do.

NOOOOOOOO NOOOOOOOOOOOO NOOOOOOOOOOOO! I AM SO TERIFIED! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO

I say we first torture and then excecute this peasant.

Tread wisely my lord. We might use his knowledge.

You think so?

Yes master.

Ok. You are the old man with a beard and that should mean you know something. I'll spare him. FOR NOW!

Let all Armenians know that the peasant know as the G is granted mercy by our mighty lord.

And thus TheG was spared his life and allowd to remain in Armenian lands for the time beeing.

**Furin** · April 01, 2008, 07:01 AM

Hail to the king baby!

Thread: AAR-MEN-NIEN

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AAR-MEN-NIEN

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Act I - Land of Confusion

Urgent

It's been a hard days (k)night

Trustmarriage

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Taxation of the 2 cents ( yes your 2 cents! )

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Clarification

End of all Peace

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Interlude

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2 cent

Act II - It's too late

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