Dictatorial hangout

[humvee2800]

Dictators are generally a distasteful lot, benevolent ones being far and inbetween, but suppose you had to spend a week with a dictator of youre choice, from any point in history, who would you choose and why.

[Khosson]

Well...why just one? If I should only choose one than I will choose Sulla because I always thought of him as being a cool guy.

But I would just as well spend a week with Caesar and Stalin.

[Gunslinger-52]

Peter the Great for sure. he wasn't exactly a dictator but what are monarchies but hereditary dictatorships.

[Quink.NL]

Hmm, interesting question.

Well, it wouldn't be Stalin, because of his paranoia, it would be hard to survive even one week, without being sent to a gulag.

It wouldn't be Hitler. I'm reading Mein Kampf at the moment, and it's extremely dull and hard to get through. One week listening continuously to his rhetorics, would drive me so insane, I'd step on a train to Stalingrad voluntarily.

Maybe Napoleon. Not too much office work, lot's of action on the battlefield from a safe point on some hill...sounds interesting.

Or maybe Alexander the Great. Lot's of feasting with alcohol and women after a won battle sounds good too.

[Khosson]

Damn how could I forget about Napoleon. I'm choosing him over Sulla.

[gaius valerius]

Napoleon or Caesar... hmm... I prefer hunting in classic Italy It will be Caesar. I'm scared of Alexander as he is capable of piercing me with a spear when he gets drunk , and he gets drunk a lot... Anyone thought about Emperor Palpatine yet?

[gambit]

Caesar would be quite a trip, especially during his war with the Gauls, always a pleasure to burn the villages rape the womens and fend off hordes of unwashed barbarians.


Also I'd like to spend some time with Darth vader for one reason

THE EMPIRE WILL BE MINE!
and yes I know vader isn't the emperor, but cmon like that old mans gonna give a fight..just wear a rubber suit

[gaius valerius]

and yes I know vader isn't the emperor, but cmon like that old mans gonna give a fight..just wear a rubber suit

I seem to remember our precious Lord Vader died after the confrontation with the emperor and even though he was attacking him from behind

So much rubber suit

[gambit]

I seem to remember our precious Lord Vader died after the confrontation with the emperor and even though he was attacking him from behind

So much rubber suit

Maybe if I put vader's suit on strings..and then hired james earl jones to distract the emperor I could stab him with a lightsaber or something, I'l make sure not to get shocked and be all crispy before I attack the emperor

[Axeman]

Vladamir Putin of course....

But seriously, maybe Mombrana of the CAR, spending a quarter of the country's GDP on a coronation ceremony declaring himself emporer sounds fun for me, but I would want to choose that week carefully so I wouldn't get swept up in that coup.

[humvee2800]

All good choices, I actually think palpatine would not be a bad guy to hang out with, assuming you are on his good side.

[gaius valerius]

Which would be the Dark Side . Well anyways, the dark side is waaay cooler as you can do all sorts of cool stuff, while on the ligth side you have to have inner restraint blablabla - eat dirt Yoda with your meditate we must!!!! I'd rather get stuck with a bunch of wookies in a federation slaveship than spend another night in da Jedi-Academy...

[Hunter Makoy]

deffinately Gias Julius, it doesn't get any greater then that, altho IMO he wasn't a dictator in the traditional sense.

[gaius valerius]

deffinately Gias Julius, it doesn't get any greater then that, altho IMO he wasn't a dictator in the traditional sense.

Why? He unlawfully usurped power, was a demagogue, authoritarian ruler, etc... Not that I think that's wrong, Rome needed such a man, all empires need such a man, he was truly great. But I in no way see him being a special case of a dictator? Could you please explain to me your viewpoint.

[Hunter Makoy]

Why? He unlawfully usurped power, was a demagogue, authoritarian ruler, etc... Not that I think that's wrong, Rome needed such a man, all empires need such a man, he was truly great. But I in no way see him being a special case of a dictator? Could you please explain to me your viewpoint.

for starters he only 'unlawfully usurped power' after he was untruthfully accused of treason and insubordination and treason, and was being forced from seeking a second term. much of the problems were brought on by the senate themselves for being paranoid of him.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Caesar%27s_civil_war u can read more here

[boofhead]

Hitler. I'd like to know what he was like as a man, rather than as exclusively the monster we all know about. I'd also like that week to find out in truth about this delicate matter:

Claimed original version, credited to Toby O'Brien

Göring has only got one ball
Hitler's [are] so very small
Himmler's so very similar
And Goebbels has no balls at all

This purported original version is interesting in that Göring has the one ball and Hitler apparently has two and that it starts with Göring. The musical comedy word play of rhyming Goebbels with "no balls" both argue in favour of this being a very early version.

[edit] Variant stanzas about Nazis

Variant number 1 (The most common variant)

Hitler has only got one ball,
Göring has two but very small,
Himmler is somewhat sim'lar,
But poor old Goebbels has no balls at all.

(In line 3, "somewhat" was sometimes replaced by "rather". The first line may also be one left ball, one brass ball, one big ball; approximately this version appears in Thomas Pynchon's V.. There is also an alternative to line 3: "Hess has even less,")


Variant number 2

Hitler has only got one ball,
The other is in the Albert Hall
His mother, the dirty bugger,
Cut it off when he was only small.

(Outside of the United Kingdom, the second line is oft invoked as "The other is on the kitchen wall" or "The other is hanging on the wall". Some areas of the United Kingdom alter the second line to include local buildings. Mancunians use "The other is in the Free Trade Hall")

Variant Number 3

Hitler has only got one ball,
Rommel has two but very small,
Himmler, has something similliar,
But Montgomery has no balls at all.

Other variations include use of the past tense, referring to Goebbels as Doctor, Hitler's other ball being "on the wall", mixtures of the variants above, and Hitler's life being "much simpler if he didn't have any at all".

[edit] Second verses: Hitler's mother

When the first verse includes Hitler's mother, a second verse is generally added:

She threw it over Germany,
It landed in the deep blue sea,
The fishes got out their dishes,
And had scallops and bollocks for tea.

or

She threw it into a conker tree
It missed and went into to the sea
The fishes got out their dishes,
And had scallops and bollocks for tea.

[edit] Verses about Germany and Germans

These verses mention neither Nazis nor Hitler:

Frankfurt has only one beer hall,
Stuttgart, die München all on call,
Munich, vee lift our tunich,
To show vee "Cherman" have no balls at all.

Hans Otto is very short, not tall,
And blotto, for drinking Singhai and Skol.
A "Cherman", unlike Bruce Erwin,
Because Hans Otto has no balls at all.

[edit] Introductory verse

(Sung to the tune of Land of Hope and Glory, and followed by some variant of the Nazi verses, above.)

Land of soap and water,
Hitler's having a bath.
Churchill's looking through the keyhole,
Having a jolly good laugh

Be..e..e..e..cause...

Hitler — has only [etc]

I'd like to check out his gonads.

[Cyphon88]

Mussolini, that guy was nuts. He kept tigers in his bedroom!!!!

Otherwise i think it would have to be lenin.

[Erwin Rommel]

No idealogiacl dictators, theyre booring

so scratch Hitler, Stalin, Lenin, Mussolini hmm whos left

Napoleon, any Byz Emp. (they are Autokrator), any Roman Emp./Leader,

Napoleon!!! it is, i;ll be the only man who has the guts to call him "BEAN SPROUT!!"

lets see if this "Napoleon Complex" is true!!!!11!!