Part 7: Maybe he's just confused?
Konya 1180
Arslan- Many lands have I conquered during my rule, but it is not by conquest alone that sultans are judged. As such I have written a series of edicts, to be set in stone and placed in all the cities of my empire. These shall be known as the Edicts of Arslan the Great!
Vizier- You mean Arslan the Fugly?
Arslan- One more word and you'll be our next 'envoy' to the Kypchaks. Apparently the last one had marvellous judgement, if not particularly good taste.
Vizier- *whistles* I... uh... have a .... food in the ... oven. Gotta go!
Arslan- That's more like it. *clears throat* My first edict is that it is the inalienable right of every man-
Malik- Or woman
Arslan- ...to rid himself-
Malik- Or herself
Arslan- ... enough corrections ok son?
Malik- Or daughter
Arslan- ... *nervous cough* ... so, uh, where was I? ... It is the birthright of every man-
Malik- Or woman
Arslan- Why don't you shut up about women Malik? I can't even remember what my damn edict was.
Malik- Women have a perfect right to play a part in our society, father.
Arslan- Why are you always on about women?
Malik- .... I want to be one.
-dead silence-
Arslan- What?
Malik- I want to be a woman. From now on I want you to call me Loretta.
Arslan- WHAT???
Malik- It's my right as a man.
Arslan- But why, why would you want to be Loretta, Malik?
Malik- I want to have babies
Arslan- *shrieking*
You want to have babies?!?
Malik- It's every man's right to have babies if he wants them.
Arslan- But you can't have babies!
Malik- Don't you oppress me!!! *runs out of the room crying*
Vizier- Congratulations on being the first sultan in history to have an emo for a son.
Arslan- I hope Kypchaks like the taste of vizier.
Vizier- *gulp*
It's an AAR and bug report thread too!