Wit contest

[Daus Maximus Jade]

Hey,
Seeing as many people here seem to have a nice sense of humor, why not create a place for them to show it off and maybe even get some rep for good stuph! I just think that we all need an occasional laugh. Even more kudos go to folks who can come up with Rome or Greece or any other ancient civilization joke.

Of course, if the moderators think that this topic is not necessary - feel free to lock/delete or do whatever you see fit.

One last request: keep the flame to a minimum.

So, just to start with.

Teacher and a student. Teacher: How was the Roman Empire cut in half? Student: With a pair of Ceasars?

and another one

Why did Ceasar buy crayons? He wanted to Mark Anthony...

[icydawgfish]

I ROFLed because those jokes are so bad...no kidding. Good job.

[Daus Maximus Jade]

I know, no need to tell me that
It's just a start, maybe others can come up with funny stuff. I am bad at humor

[Mordrorru]

Alright.

\_/ <--- Cup

\_/ <--- Cup


I've put poison into one of those cups. It is odorless, tasteless, dissolves instantly in liquid, is among the more deadly poisons known to man.

Where is the poison!? The battle of wits has begun! It ends when you decide and we both drink, and we find out who is right...

And who is dead.

[Bello Gallicum]

Alright.

\_/ <--- Cup

\_/ <--- Cup


I've put poison into one of those cups. It is odorless, tasteless, dissolves instantly in liquid, is among the more deadly poisons known to man.

Where is the poison!? The battle of wits has begun! It ends when you decide and we both drink, and we find out who is right...

And who is dead.

I never drink out of a clean cup.

[Mordrorru]

yea mordurru i play rs, just because my joke isnt about history doenst mean i dont. this stupid jok you had isnst histiry related.

Oh, because some of your posts could qualify as spam, so I was just wondering if you stumbled across the forum and decided to annoy people in it. My bad.

[Tankbuster]

Take it easy guys

We are in the joke thread here


Teacher: What is a forum? Pupil: Two-um plus two-um!

[Daus Maximus Jade]

The top cup. *drinks and dies*

[swhunter]

LOL.. not badd......

[♔Jean-Luc Picard♔]

i will say the poison is in both cups, but you will not die because you have been dosing yourself with the antidote for a few days building an immunity of sorts to the poison. i will die because i have no immunity. you will live because the poison will be neutralized by the antidote that has built up in your system.

how bout them apples?
Skan

[Mordrorru]

i will say the poison is in both cups, but you will not die because you have been dosing yourself with the antidote for a few days building an immunity of sorts to the poison. i will die because i have no immunity. you will live because the poison will be neutralized by the antidote that has built up in your system.

how bout them apples?
Skan

Wrong, the poison is in neither cup. The whole thing was set up just to keep you distracted long enough for my ninjas to sneak up behind you and slit your throat.

How 'bout them apples? -sips cup-

[tone]

Someone's been watching The Princess Bride! Great film.

[♔Jean-Luc Picard♔]

indeed it is. the question sounded like the one in the film so i had to use the film's answer as best as i could remember.

SKan

[♔Jean-Luc Picard♔]

thats pretty disturbing...

Skan

[Tankbuster]

Woohoo. Dry humor.

Teacher: Why did the Romans build straight roads?
Kid: So the Germans couldn't hide around the corner!

[Daus Maximus Jade]

Teacher: How was Rome built?
Kid: At night.
Teacher: What?
Kid: My dad told me that Rome wasn't built in a day so...

[phalangite]

I got a funny one.

A guy walks into a stroe and said "you wait there my man ill be right back"(snickers)

"oooo, this looks good get me a bananer, wait heres a soder ill save this for later"(he is still laughing)

"hmmm, potato chips(tears open bag eats a hanful then scatters them)"

store onwer said "pay for the doo and take it with you"(angry)

guys walks to counter opens a pickle jar takes a bite out of a pickle put it back in and saids "look china lady, i got a piece in my pocket, a gun that tells me i gots the rights to do anything anytime anywhere"(he is lieing and laughing)

china lady throws stuff at him and he runs out of the store gets in car and zooms off scared!HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHMUHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

[Tankbuster]

Teacher: How was Rome built?
Kid: At night.
Teacher: What?
Kid: My dad told me that Rome wasn't built in a day so...

Just out of curiosity... did you read Horrible Histories: The Rotten Romans?

[Daus Maximus Jade]

uhhhhh... ha ha ha... ha? could be better if I understood anything, but it seems that my skill of English was overestimated greatly... or at least that guy's skill of English...

[phalangite]

uhhhhh... ha ha ha... ha? could be better if I understood anything, but it seems that my skill of English was overestimated greatly... or at least that guy's skill of English...

Okay dausy maxey, the guy that speaks is speaking street talk, such as aint instead of Im not.

I got a funny one.

A guy walks into a store and said "You wait there my man I'll be right back"(snickers)

"oooo, this looks good get me a bananer, wait here's a soder I'll save this for later"(he is still laughing)

"hmmm, potato chips(tears open bag eats a handful then scatters them)"

store owner said "Pay for the food and take it with you"(angry)

Guy walks to counter opens a pickle jar takes a bite out of a pickle put it back in and saids "look china lady, I got a piece in my pocket, a gun that tells me I gots the rights to do anything, anytime, anywhere"(he is lieing and laughing)

China lady throws stuff at him and he runs out of the store gets in the car and zooms off scared!HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHMUHAHAHAHAHAHAHA