So, do you want to visit the U.K? Stupid reasons not to.

[Garbarsardar]

• "you wish to go to the UK for a holiday. You have never previously undertaken any foreign travel before and I can see little reason for this trip".(It's a bad way to start travelling mate)
• "you plan a holiday for no particular purpose other than sightseeing". (Indeed. Milton Keynes anyone?)
• "you do not have sufficient command of the language for the purposes of tourism". (unlike the Brits who are Swahili experts)
• "you have little or no idea what you plan to see or do".

Well, it's not a prank. The "ridiculous reasons" for rejecting visas were set out in a report by the independent monitor of UK visas.

And here is some of the language the staff used in replying to the applications:

• The provenance of the funds depicted is not evidenced allied to other financial commitments
• You have failed to complete pivotal areas of Section 6
• I can only assess your mutual knowledge in a subjective context

Sufficient command of the language, heh?


http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/politics/6768405.stm

[Sidus Preclarum]

Bloody hilarious...

[LoZz]

rofl

[Erik]

What's so bad about having to list some tourist attractions to get a visa?

I once had to convert to Christianity to get a visa for Ghana.

[Tabell]

Strange, theyll let people with no command and the language and no money in permanently, but paying customers are refused.

[Tom Paine]

You have failed to complete pivotal areas of Section 6

That sounds like a good reason to me, actually... what's wrong with it?

The rest are... silly, on the other hand. Silly, silly, silly.

[The Sundance Kid]

A foreign guy (eastern european, I won't say my instinct coz im not 100% sure and that'll generally cause outrage) got stabbed in my town the other week, and when police searched his body, found out he had 7 visas stolen (or acquired) from different people on his person. They think he was sending them to new immigrants, who'd get here then give the real ones back to him who'd then send them back for more people; they'd get a sub-standard fake one which wouldn't have passed customs but would do most other places.

[Thanatos]

Well, that sucks!

[Markas]

[*]You have failed to complete pivotal areas of Section 6

God I hope section six is 'Are you a member of a terrorist organisation?'

I suppose answering 'not anymore' doesn't get you in.

Great stuff.

[Darkragnar]

"you wish to go to the UK for a holiday. You have never previously undertaken any foreign travel before and I can see little reason for this trip".(It's a bad way to start travelling mate)

LOL-Darkragnar

[the Black Prince]

what on earth is wrong with Milton Keynes?????? its a beautiful city, one of the greenest urban areas in the country, second only, i think, to Welwyn Garden City


The provenance of the funds depicted is not evidenced allied to other financial commitments
- you've not shown that you have the financial means available or pending to enter the country, and therefore its suspected you will simply be a burden on the states benefits.

You have failed to complete pivotal areas of Section 6
- key elements of section 6 have not been completed

I can only assess your mutual knowledge in a subjective context
- i have no idea, but i guess it might make more sense in the original context

[Garbarsardar]

what on earth is wrong with Milton Keynes?????? its a beautiful city, one of the greenest urban areas in the country, second only, i think, to Welwyn Garden City

Nothing wrong, except if

• you like to walk around without using pedestrian tunnels or endless bypasses for the endless roundabouts
• you are accustomed to cities that have a center which is not a gigantic shopping mall
• you are not a developer
• you dislike ugly concrete faceless buildings
• your previous residence was not Slough or Lutton
• you like your city to have an identity
• you abhor concrete deserts
• you have aesthetics that go beyond car driver utilitarianism

as for the trees, they will need to plant 150 foot mallorns to hide the ugliness and what's so good with trees if you cannot even walk amongst those?

The provenance of the funds depicted is not evidenced allied to other financial commitments
- you've not shown that you have the financial means available or pending to enter the country, and therefore its suspected you will simply be a burden on the states benefits.

You have failed to complete pivotal areas of Section 6
- key elements of section 6 have not been completed

I can only assess your mutual knowledge in a subjective context
- i have no idea, but i guess it might make more sense in the original context

Indeed; translation is necessary.

[Alatar]

Nothing wrong, except if

• you like to walk around without using pedestrian tunnels or endless bypasses for the endless roundabouts
• you are accustomed to cities that have a center which is not a gigantic shopping mall
• you are not a developer
• you dislike ugly concrete faceless buildings
• your previous residence was not Slough or Lutton
• you like your city to have an identity
• you abhor concrete deserts
• you have aesthetics that go beyond car driver utilitarianism

as for the trees, they will need to plant 150 foot mallorns to hide the ugliness and what's so good with trees if you cannot even walk amongst those?

Actually the tress have a very good advantage.
When you drive through Milton Keyenes you can't see milton keyens, which is a brilliant idea.

[Darkragnar]

I can only assess your mutual knowledge in a subjective context
- i have no idea, but i guess it might make more sense in the original context

i think hes saying i can only analyze you in a subjective manner, so i cant take personal reasons into account while doing this.

[preston]

what b**ch that woman is. she is ******* retarded. i think thats worse than it is here in the U.S. now i know i'll never be able to visit london

[Gary88]

this is slightly off topic but is tourist based humour

http://humour.200ok.com.au/aussie_tourism.html

[Cúchulainn]

Jesus, you people are picky.
It's called sightseeing.
You seen places, places you have never seen before.
The clue's in the title