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  1. Re: Tale of the Week 294: Battle of Trenton - Winner's Circle

    Congratulations!
  2. Re: Peace (the first part of a horror-y short story - roughly 700 words here) Feedback would be nice :)

    I see. What you say about how the characters got there makes sense, just remember your readers are trying to understand this too. I'm not sure what alternative word to use for the 'movable...
  3. Re: Peace (the first part of a horror-y short story - roughly 700 words here) Feedback would be nice :)

    I really liked it. I think your grasp on the English language is excellent and this piece reads as if English is your first language. I also got some Lovecraftian vibes from your prose, I think this...
  4. Poll: Re: Tale of the Week 294: Battle of Trenton - VOTING THREAD

    Voted. Good luck fellow writers.
  5. Re: Tale of the Week 294: Battle of Trenton - SUBMISSION THREAD

    Hello, it's been awhile. Here's my submission for Tale of the Week 294 - Word Count 274.

    Patrick ground his teeth. Every splash of his paddle burned his knuckles cold. He shivered. River mist...
  6. Re: Memories beside the Fountain of Life - (950 words)

    Thanks, glad you enjoyed it :)
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    Sticky: Re: I'm currently listening to

    No way! I always thought that 'oooooh, oh, oh, oooooh,' sound was a singer, lol.

    Here's a great James Bond themed music video...

    P_SlAzsXa7E
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    Re: Writers' Study 2018 - Awards Ceremony Feast!

    Congratulations! Well done everyone :thumbsup2
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    Sticky: Re: I'm currently listening to

    Nice, that was very interesting. I've never seen that instrument before.
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    Sticky: Re: I'm currently listening to

    Epic video...

    ABz2m0olmPg
  11. Re: Memories beside the Fountain of Life - (950 words)

    Thanks Alwyn, glad you enjoyed it.
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    Sticky: Re: I'm currently listening to

    Wow, that is one hell of an instrument. A nice blend of raw engineering and music.
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    Sticky: Re: I'm currently listening to

    This is great! The video made me go...

    nxHyhHQSrfw
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    Sticky: Re: I'm currently listening to

    Diocle - Nice, I like this one a lot. If I had not seen the video I would have thought there were at least two harps playing. She's very good. I bet she's deadly in a thumb war too.
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    Sticky: Re: I'm currently listening to

    Dreamy...

    10Jg_25ytU0
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    Sticky: Re: I'm currently listening to

    Ferdiad - Cool, I have heard this song before but not seen the video. Simple but great!



    I like this song. I think the 2001 Space Odyssey footage goes well with the music, though the music...
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    Re: Derc Plays Through World History (Current: Rome - Alexander)

    Hah, well done Alexander.

    Should have devoted some time to swimming lessons.
  18. Memories beside the Fountain of Life - (950 words)

    Note: This story was originally intended for ToTW 286 but it was too long to meet the word count.




    Memories beside the Fountain of Life


    Asger’s chest heaved as his grey hair hung lank...
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    Re: Derc Plays Through World History (Current: Rome - Alexander)

    Oh great, I'm looking forward to this. A few months ago I was reading up on the Diadochi Wars. Does this campaign include Alexander's generals in his army? I look forward to seeing your battles...
  20. Re: Who has self-published on Amazon or another e-book store?

    I don't have Patreon experience but I am on the verge of self-publishing my first book on Amazon. Finding an income to support further writing would be great. Excluding this forum, I have no audience...
  21. Re: Tale of the Week 285: Haunted - WINNER'S CIRCLE!

    Congrats on the win! Well done Kilo for getting into the tie break too.
  22. Re: Starship Troopers Short Story - The Hero of Outpost Delta (Fanfic, 2600 words)

    Comments on the structure would be great, thanks! I do appreciate you spending your free time on my writing.
  23. Re: Starship Troopers Short Story - The Hero of Outpost Delta (Fanfic, 2600 words)

    Hey San Felipe, here's my reply...


    Yeah, I agree. There is something about the word 'as' that I find dislikeable. I don't know why. I feel the same about sentences that have too many words...
  24. Re: Starship Troopers Short Story - The Hero of Outpost Delta (Fanfic, 2600 words)

    Apparently its been just over a week since you posted your critique. Sorry for my snail-paced response.


    No problem. I like your comments you mentioned about pacing (style) in my Stalker story...
  25. Re: Starship Troopers Short Story - The Hero of Outpost Delta (Fanfic, 2600 words)

    Wow, a double whammy of critique! :thumbsup2

    Many thanks to you both for taking the time to read my story and write down your thoughts. I will reply in a couple of days once I've had time to...
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    Re: Guess the movie from the picture!

    What about a film called Ironclad?
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    Re: Derc Plays Through World History (Current: Medieval 1 - Grand Campaign [End])

    Great finishing post and I enjoyed your closing thoughts. Is it possible to keep playing after the end turn? I quite like the idea of playing a long game myself because those rebel stacks looked like...
  28. Re: S.T.A.L.K.E.R Short Story - A Fatal Rookie Mistake (Fanfic, 950 words)

    Ah yes, I see what you mean. The new version has very different pacing. Now you've pointed it out, I do like the original pace; the rewrite speeds into the story much faster. But there is something I...
  29. Re: S.T.A.L.K.E.R Short Story - A Fatal Rookie Mistake (Fanfic, 950 words)

    That is very interesting to know, thanks for the thoughts.

    Once the story has flushed out my mind I will return to it and re-read with fresh eyes and compare the two pieces. I feel I have found a...
  30. Re: S.T.A.L.K.E.R Short Story - A Fatal Rookie Mistake (Fanfic, 950 words)

    Many thanks for taking the time to read my rewrite and share your thoughts.

    I've learned a lot from participating in the TotW here. With those stories I have been forced to make brutal edits in...
  31. Re: Starship Troopers Short Story - The Hero of Outpost Delta (Fanfic, 2600 words)

    That's great. Looking forward to it. I will be rewriting my S.T.A.L.K.K.E.R story as well as this Starship Trooper story soon; using the improved prose techniques I have learned from participating in...
  32. Re: Tale of the Week 285: Haunted - Submissions thread

    Here is my entry for the creepy season. 489 Words.


    Misandry

    “Shh." Detective Kelly jabbed his finger to his lips. His eyes transfixed upon the basement's doorknob.

    “What do you hear?”...
  33. Re: The Fool and His Keeper (The Chonicles or Matt and Morn)[updated: Nov 3]

    Really seems fine to me. So long as the key info in Morn's dialogue is clear and understandable, the accent won't obstruct and break immersion.

    A thought - you could always use Matt's reactions...
  34. Re: The Fool and His Keeper (The Chonicles or Matt and Morn)[updated: Nov 3]

    Nice. Enjoying your story. Don't leave us on a cliffhanger for too long!
  35. Re: S.T.A.L.K.E.R Short Story - A Fatal Rookie Mistake (Fanfic, 950 words)

    Hey Kilo, sure any feedback would be great, thanks for the offer. I hope you feel better soon (maybe llamas will rescue you?)

    I am itching to write another one of these short stories but I am...
  36. Re: Tale of the Week 284: It is only when you fall that you learn whether you can fly - WINNER'S CIRCLE

    Congratulations Big War Bird! An excellent win :thumbsup2
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    Re: Derc Plays Through World History (Current: Medieval 1 - Grand Campaign)

    Nice, the horde is hungry! You have about half the map already.

    I like the historical tidbits that pop-up in this game. I seem to remember one that details a group of pilgrim children who get...
  38. Re: The Fool and His Keeper (The Chonicles or Matt and Morn)[updated: Oct 14]

    That's great, you have instinctive writing skills. A word wizard :)



    Yes, I can relate to that. My favourite part of writing is when I return to a draft to polish it up and make it sound nice....
  39. Great article Alwyn, thanks for taking the time...

    Great article Alwyn, thanks for taking the time to create it.
  40. Re: Tale of the Week 283: Starship Down - WINNER'S CRICLE

    Many thanks for the votes. This was a fun story write.

    @NorseThing - I got the potato idea from SilentKiller's intro to the competition, 'Space is dangerous --asteroid belts, space pirates, large...
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