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Tall an' handsome

Loving my Dog and loosing Weight

Rating: 5 votes, 4.80 average.
Yesterday I was at my local Woolworth store buying a large bag of “My Dog” dog food for my loyal pet and was in the checkout queue when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

What did she think I had an elephant? So, since I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Dog Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn’t, because I ended up in hospital last time, but I'd lost 10 kilograms before I woke up in intensive care with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pockets with My Dog nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in queue was now enthralled with my story.)

Horrified, she asked me if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off the kerb to sniff an Irish Setter's butt and a car hit me.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard. I'm now banned from Woolworth.

Updated May 09, 2015 at 07:04 AM by Gigantus

Categories
Life on TWC

Comments

  1. GrnEyedDvl's Avatar
    Omg that is funny.
  2. Junaidi83 de Bodemloze's Avatar
    Hahaha especially about part being banned :P
  3. PikeStance's Avatar
    LOL, I don't know what's worse the original question or the follow up question. Very funny ending!
  4. Shankbot de Bodemloze's Avatar
    :laughter::laughter:
  5. Navajo Joe's Avatar
    You are barking mad!!!!!!

    I don't know about you, but when I go to the pet store, I get this wanting to try out the doggie chocs, especially those ones, that are white buttons covered with sprinkles and wash it down with a dog beer!!
  6. GrnEyedDvl's Avatar
    Ok I guess this gave me the urge to mess with people. A friend of mine saw a dog licking his um ... self the other day and said " I wish I could do that." My response was "If you give him a treat he might let you..."
  7. Gigantus's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by GrnEyedDvl
    Ok I guess this gave me the urge to mess with people. A friend of mine saw a dog licking his um ... self the other day and said " I wish I could do that." My response was "If you give him a treat he might let you..."
    That's the spirit! http://www.infracta.de/wbb/images/smilies/f8.gif
  8. Halie Satanus's Avatar
    :laughter: