Cat Tails

[NorseThing]

The Case of the Can Opener Kitty

by NorseThing

Mortimer must have had a previous home where can openers were used to open up the cat food. I only feed the dry pebbles and then only timed for twice a day feedings of measured amounts. I take the manufacturer's recommendations seriously. I know nothing about what is a healthy diet for myself let alone for a cat. The manufacturer suggests approximate age and activity levels for the cats. I use these bits of information to determine which bag of pebbles I should buy.

So the only variable on the bag to be concerned with for a particular cat is a daily amount based upon the cat's weight. Sage is a bit longer. Both of the cats weigh about the same. Thus, Mortimer is a bit more over weight. Actually enough overweight that he waddles a bit when he walks. The bag states to feed each the same amount since they weigh about the same.

Sage was described as overweight when we made the adoption. Then, I am overweight at my age and height and have been so ever since high school. I even played tennis, played in pickup basket ball games after school, rode my bicycle everywhere,jogged, and even ran cross country. I was still considered overweight as a teenager. Or at least according to what the doctors tell me. Today, I have no doubt that I am overweight, but earlier in life.... So I have personal grave doubts about doctors or veterinarians making the conclusion of over weight for people let alone for cats. They look at a printed chart and the chart says'overweight'. Not my idea of educated advice.

I guess Mortimer fits the stereotype of the 'fat cat'. I was advised to not worry about the cats specific weights though. Just feed them to maintain their current weights. Any person putting a cat on a weight loss diet needs to do so with help. I know from experience that weight loss can lead to fatty liver disease which is far worse than a simply obese cat.

Getting back to the can opener....Mortimer has his own criteria for what is the equal to a dinner bell clanging from the farmhouse back door. Just as the hired hands and the farmer know to head for the afternoon meal spread out on the back porch table, the turning of the can opener is his 'dinner bell'. He is simply obsessed with eating and never misses a 'chance' to get fed when my hand turns the knob on the side of a modern handheld can opener. Today, it was a can of tomato for a Sloppy Joe recipe. He cannot realistically smell cat friendly food from a can of tomato sauce. It is only quiet the sound of the can opener turning that brings him out of hiding.

Then, of course, Sage comes to checkout what must be some interesting action in the kitchen. Of course Sage is not fooled with the can opener. He quickly loses interest. Sage must be thinking to himself, “False alarm. Silly black male cat does not even know when to get excited about food.”

Mortimer is always looking for free food. Pretty much like the homeless and near homeless on the streets asking each and every person for a handout whether you look rich or poor. So it is no surprise that Mortimer is always at the dining table when the human members of the household sit down to eat. Usually he is patient, but not always. Sometimes he is subtle with quiet mewing. Sometimes it is very obvious with the a paw reaching up to catch your arm while you are eating. Fortunately (or unfortunately), Mortimer was declawed by a previous owner so no harm from the paw. It is an effective reminder. Pretty much like a verbal, “Hey! What about me down here? Don't I get any of the good stuff too!”

Cats like to copy. I am guessing that is where the phrase copycat comes from. These and other cats I had know over the years are no exception. They copy each other to fit in. They each copy the humans to fit in. Probably, the humans also copy, but this is all about tales of cats. We are a den in the world of cats. A family. We all acquire the good habits as well as the bad habits of the household to fit in as respected members of the household.

Now, on many occasions there is nothing of the 'good stuff' on the table. At least not if you are a cat. One time my beloved discovered that pieces of corn chips and crackers are a bit like the cat's pebbles. Well at least similar since they are all crunchy bits in one form or another. Both cats fall for it. Even Sage likes munching on such crunchy bits when they are presented by one of the humans. I think their faith in the humans is pretty absolute.

I admit to perhaps feeding expectations. The can opener can equal a dinner bell. Every time I open a can of tuna, Mortimer comes running. Unlike the can of tomato sauce, he does get more excited when he smells tuna. So now it is smell plus key sounds and motions. Mortimer then goes into his 'I love the humans' routine. He rubs up against your legs. He squeaks a bit or what sounds like a squeak. It is not the same as a whine,but pretty close to such a sound. I do not feed him tuna, but he does get to lick the can clean after I dump the contents into my mixing bowl for at ever I am going to use tuna with for my personal consumption. It does not matter if the tuna is oil packed or water packed in the can. Actually Mortimer likes to lick both his bowl and Sages bowl clean after the portion of pebbles have been consumed. So he likes to simply lick all containers clean.

Once I place the can on the floor,Mortimer goes wild. He licks the inside of the can. He pushes the can all around the kitchen while attempting to get the very last bit of flavor out of the can. This entire frenzy can last for several minutes. This is frenzy that Sage has never taken a part in. Maybe he is not interested or perhaps it is not an activity for two male cats to jointly participate in. I do not know.

[NorseThing]

Penny herds a Turtle

by NorseThing

Cats are hunters. Even the kitty in the suburban home has the instincts and perhaps even the skills to be a successful hunter. We hear all the time about how cats decimate the bird population by taking on the birds one at a time when they least expect it. Stalking and patience are just a part of what a cat needs to be successful.


It is different for a well fed suburban kitty than it would be for the lean and hungry barn cat. Barn cats are there to catch the vermin that threaten the supplies and produce of the farm. This means they are not well fed. My cats have scheduled morning and evening feedings. Barn cats have to look out for their opportunities which usually means the mouse or rat on the barn floor out in the open. I remember one cook-out at my mother's cousin's farm. Steaks were just placed on several grills. We, the kids, were all getting a treat of our very first T-bone that we would not need to share with a sibling. We were all having a great time catching up on what everyone had been doing for the past several months and....


A blinding fast burst of speed. A young and lean tabby was on one of the grills ignoring the red hot coals. He grabbed the biggest steak and he was off as fast as he was on the approach. He was probably watching for some time. He knew exactly when to act and what to grab. We never saw that particular barn cat for the rest of the day. That steak was gone forever. The two of the youngest kids now had to share a T-bone. I may have been lucky not to be one of the youngest, but as one of the older kids, I and a several of my cousins got a real ribbing for not watching the grills. A lesson learned about life on the farm for us from the city.


As I said earlier, life is different for the suburban kitty. They know or have faith where their next meal is coming from. As the human guardians of these furry critters, we want them to be full and happy. So we feed them. Sometimes this mean we feed them to much. The family cat, Red Copper Penny Candy(or some variation from each family member) or simply Penny was our spoiled kitty. That meant hunting was not a necessity, but all cats like to hunt.


One of our next door neighbors was widowed. Among the tasks she could no longer perform on her own was mowing her yard. She could still do some gardening and of course the occasional sweeping of debris off the patio or grass clippings from the sidewalk. She wanted to be out and active, but some tasks were too much for her. At my parents' urging, I offered to help out with the lawn work. Run the hand mower over the law once a week and do some trimming and clipping where needed. She had a hedge in the back that was always neatly trimmed, so I to on that task as well as the lawn. She continued to help out on the flower beds and the sweeping. Together, it did not take much time. I guess for a preteen it may have seemed like quite a bit of time to me. No matter. I was willing though parental prodding got me started.


To get back to Penney, the kitty was very much interested in our neighbor. Actually it was the neighbor's black poodle that held the interest. The dog was always leashed outside in the backyard on the patio, so Penny could approach and inspect if a proper safe distance was maintained. This took a bit of learning by trial and error. No harm was done, but I imagine there were some close calls.


I then learned of neighbors complaining that Penny was picking on the leashed dogs in the neighborhood. Penny was determining the leash length that was safe for a cat to approach the dog. Then Penny would get the dog's attention. The dog would then rush out to only be stopped by the collared leash. The Penny would scratch the dog;s nose safe from being torn to pieces by the leash. This was just like the cartoons on Saturday morning. I guess life is like that. Cartoons mimic what people see in real life. The neighbors were not pleased. I guess the newness of the trick wore off after while. At least after a few weeks I never heard of this continuing.


But Penny was a house kitty and an important part of our den. I think even the cats respect members of their den or perhaps only when it suits them. I am not certain about these details involving cat logic and cat morals. Back to the story....


We often made trips to Wisconsin and Minnesota. On one of our trips we had been camping near a lake. Great fun! Of course Penny stayed at home, but this was great fun for young boys to explore the woods and the lake. Even to swim. Of course our father wanted to interest us in fishing, but I think he met with what could only be described as 'limited success'. He pretty much did the fishing and we enjoyed the boat ride.


As boys, the trip more successful by the lake shore. Actually by the stream entering the lake. We 'found' a turtle. Not a small one like you find in the pet section of a Ben Franklin or Woolworth's store. This was much larger. Maybe as much as 6 or 7 inches in length of the shell. It was still the standard green turtle found in the pet section though. We met a park ranger that explained this all to us. How the turtles in the pet store were doomed to remain small turtles because of what they were fed and how cramped their home was.
So I (as the oldest) asked, “So how much room does a turtle need?”


His response was, “What you see here in the park pretty much works for this turtle.”


So we with great reluctance released “Greenie” back to the stream. We returned to the camper with tales to tell though! We asked our father about keeping a turtle. We already had an aquarium and and hamsters. And of course, Penny! He did not answer though. No comment was good eough for me. It was not a straight out no. We proceeded on hunting down a suitable box and a plastic bag liner. We then headed back to the stream on a turtle hunt.


We found another green turtle. About the same size, but probably not the same one we found earlier. The turtle went into the plastic lined box along with some water. We returned to the camp with our announcement. Father was aghast. How could we trap a wild animal? How would we meet the turtle's needs for food and room? Father gathered us up along with the turtle box and we were marched back to the stream.

We meet the ranger along the way. My father and the ranger talked. They both then came back to use and the turtle and made an announcement or perhaps it was a demand, “We discussed the issue with the turtle. It is not against the park rules to take this turtle home. The ranger agrees with me that keeping this turtle would be a big job. The turtle needs a home large enough to thrive. And the turtle need proper feeding. Not the flakes sold at the pet store. The turtle needs raw meat and ripe fruit. If you want to take on the responsibility, you can keep the turtle.”

Of course we all agreed to take good care of Greenie. Boys are like that. We agree to anything if we get what we want immediately. No thoughts or concerns about commitment to future responsibilities.

So we packed up the camp and set off back to our home with a box containing Greenie. At home Father assisted in laying out a plan for Greenie's new home. But he was not going to do the work. I needed to understand that was my responsibility. He laid out the parameters of the new home. He bought the screening and lumber and the plastic underlay for the pond. It was now up to me to do the digging and build the pond, the fencing cover under the crab apple tree for shading. Mother also watched from a distance, but I could tell this was not what she wanted. This was a guy thing and only guy thing. She stayed up on the patio and laid down on a lounge and watched us work.

It took several days, but I did finish the task. At last the compound was completed. Mother did come down to the far end of the yard to review the work. We were then given permission to place Greenie in his new home. Mother then returned with a small bit of hamburger and some cut up and very ripe apple pieces. We should place this on the bank of the pond and let Greenie to discover the food. And we were told to leave Greenie alone.

We did this as 'suggested'. Every other day we left the food for Greenie on the dry bank of the pond. He ate some each time and left quite a bit which I then needed to clean up before the neighborhood would smell the remains of Greenie dinner. This continued pretty uch as a routine for about two weeks. Then one morning I headed out to the compound with Greenie's dinner and discovered that Greenie was gone! He had pulled open the fencing and escaped! We headed out in all directions to no avail. No Greenie was to be found anywhere.


Several days passed. As young boys, we were sad at the loss of Greenie, but this was quickly forgotten as other summer activities we always distracting young boys. Baseball at the park. Bicycling around the block. Even John Wayne and winning against the bad guy at the local theatre on Saturday afternoon.


The a neighbor called my mother. She had spotted a turtle near the drainage ditch several blocks away. So mom gathered me up and we headed out to investigate. Yes! It was Greenie. But also Penny, The cat was herding the turtle back toward our home. Apparently the cat had been herding the turtle for sever days. This was much closer to our home than the neighbor had seen the turtle yesterday. I picjed up Greenie and along with Penny we returned to the house. I placed Greenie back in the compound and nailed down the screening more secure than I had the first time. A 'lunch of ground beef and ripe fruit was prepared and left on the bank. Greenie did not wait for us to leave. That turtle was hungry.


That evening, Father had a discussion with us at the dinner table about Greenie. “I think what you have done to build a compound for the turtle was good work. But it may not have been good enough, Greenie set off looking for more space and better water. I think we need to make another camping trip this weekend. Greenie needs to be returned to the stream he loves. He misses the stream.”


So it was decided. We returned Greenie to the stream. After returning of the camping trip, I filled in the compound and disposed of the screening, lumber, and pond liner in the trash.
So ends the summer with the turtle. And Penny herded a turtle. At least I think Penny was herding the turtle back toward our home.

[Alwyn]

I like the way that you set up our expectations, talking about how cats like to hunt, and then we discover what Penny did when Greenie escaped (which was not what I imagined she'd be doing.) Nicely done!