Issues with loading a Multiplayer Campaign save game

[TheRazaman]

Some background info:

Game version - Emperor Edition, standalone
Mods - DeI only (no submods or others)
Laptop - Windows 7 64-bit Ultimate
Desktop - Windows 7 32-bit Premium
Firewall access - Allowed on both
Connection - LAN (literally; not Hamachi/Tunngle)
Multiplayer Battles - working perfectly

We can each host&join the other's multiplayer campaign. Playing (Athens & Sparta) goes smoothly as well--only tested thru 2 turns b/c of save issues. On Legendary mode no Autosave is ever created for either one of us upon turn ending, yet on <=Very Hard we can each save. The problem is then with loading the save. I can Host from Save, and will be Sparta as is proper. However, once my friend joins I'm then moved to 2nd player spot as Rome and he is then Sparta.
The game will load but then we're both in control of Sparta, can hit End Turn and then it freezes at Rome's turn (neither of us having control).

Our settings are: Very Hard, 3 minute turn limit, 40 minute battles, default to Manual battles.

As a further note, I took a look in the Roaming/CA save folder on both comps and the file is called .save_multiplayer instead how it reads in game on the Load Save screen.Perhaps that has something to do with it?

This is super frustrating because the idea of us hammer and anviling the world is so damn tantalizing, yet, seemingly, just out of reach. Any help would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks y'all

[Tyso3]

There is no autosave on legendary.

Legendary offers no real difference to very hard expect for 2 factors. You can't save and the ai is spammed with more money then it needs, making it incredibly unrealistic (1 Minor town faction with a 6/7000 per turn income....).

I would suggest running on normal/hard and having more player restricting mods (to make it harder for you to balance out the AI) But the AI does not get any smarter after 'Normal'

[romeplayer]

bump

has anyone been able to resolve this?; i have the same problem when loading a save game loads the same fraction; i'm using the LanFix v2; i believe the cause is that both computers are using the same steam_api.dll and steam_api files but i don't know how to fix it