Gentlemen prefer blondes, a M2TW Moor migrated campaign

[Asdrubaal]

Gentlemen prefer Blondes, A Moor Migrated Campaign
On vanilla M2TW
The Rules, directives and the anything I want to say about the Campaign

• Seeing Christians kill each other is really amusing, we won’t take part unless attacked, and then only in defence of our country
• Timescale is 0.5
• FoW is off, we need to see the Christians to laugh at them
• Trolling the Christians is funny; if I’m bored I may take a few lands from the most powerful empire in the map and give them to the least powerful nation.
• I have absolute power to change any of the rules.
• My writing is chaotic and my game is in Spanish, thanks for noticing
• if you have any doubt, question or criticism feel free to post it
• Updates will come when updates come

T50

Welcome to the mighty Moor kingdom of Albion,

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today, on the 25^th anniversary of the dead of Sultan Tahar we pray for his soul to be on the celestial paradise he wanted to go to (which, knowing his fixation on blonde women is probably the Nordic Valhalla, he always said that “gentlemen prefer blondes”), although his anniversary is usually a happy event now we are sad, as today has died our glorious Sultan Miswar, the man who was able to fulfil the dream of Tahar

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about freeing our people from the horrible sun of our homeland and bringing all of us to a paradise, the mythical island of Albion, it was a hard fight but once we defeated its original inhabitants and sent them to the mainland we have lived in peace for years, our merchants are making business everywhere on the world and their news come to us constantly, the royal court’s usual amusement is the decadence that walks over the world, they love conflicts such as the fratricidal Hispanic war, where the little though powerful Portuguese are cutting apart the Spaniards, most of their forces travelling on a suicidal crusade against Egypt

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Or the two front war France is fighting against both the Milanese and the Scots

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The Eastern Roman Empire, also known as the Byzantines have pressed deep within Turk territories but now they must fight on two fronts, as the Venetians are attacking them from Europe

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The Magyars are on severe difficulties as their provocations to the mighty Holy German-Roman Empire have not been left unanswered.

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Our court is of the opinion that the Polish and the Rus will end up waging war on each other, and the Polish crusading army attacking the rebel castle of Vilna is doing nothing to stop the tensions.

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The future will tell us how the world evolves, what's sure is that there will be war, there will be tons of dead peasants lazily laying on the streets and there will be strange and weird plot twists, let's see what entertainment will the future bring to the court.

Now on something completely different I have the honour of presenting:
Some minor plot (it's not all about pretty pictures and jokes)

The Book of the Moors

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….
I am Tahar, Sultan of the Moors, I’ve fought during all of my live to unite our people and guide our nation to glory…
And I’ve had enough! The sun, always hot and… well, sunny, the desert, full of sand, how am I supposed to rule a country as bad as this? But I have plans, I plan to make a pilgrimage along with our people to the island of Albion, where we will be protected of high intensity cancer-producing sunlight and I will be able to gather a harem full of blonde women thanks to how close is the Danish Kingdom, if I die during the preparations my son Miswar will continue my work, he has always understood me and he Is a true gentleman, I will leave this book so that each Sultan is able to register his thoughts on the present and future of our nation, a sort of legacy to our people.
End of the First Entry on the Book of Our Most Gloriously Mighty and Powerful (Always exaggerating, how typical of father) Nation

….

Miswar the scarred, Sultan of the Moors
Entry nº 46 on the book of our nation.
Another entry on the book of our country, today we’ve finally pacified Albion, the Scots have been deported to the mainland and our navy protects us from any English retaliation coming from across the channel, our archers and crossbowmen are experienced and will not let the enemy get inside our fortresses, the work that my father started and I continued has finally ended, as I write this I know that death is coming after me, the quill weights in my hands, I think I’m going to have some sleep…
….

And a mysterious dialogue

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….
-Are you sure this will work?
-As sure as anyone can be, you are too good as a general to lose your talent just because “you are a woman and you should marry and bla, bla, bla,…” never liked this line of thinking, and be sure that with this mask no one will ever realise you are a woman.
-What about my voice?
-What happens with it? You are too young but your grandfather Miswar had a feminine voice, he said it was the perfect voice for a gentleman, and you don’t want to know what he did to anyone who dared calling him “girly”.
-Yes, of course I want to know.
-grfl… fine, he forced them to transform puppies into minced meat, after such psychological torture he would cut their ears, tongue and nose, then both of their arms and legs, and then he would throw them from the highest tower of the realm,
-I think I will have some difficulties to do such things during the campaigns, I will need to think of an alternative…
….

Now we know why some Islam faction generals are wearing ornamental masks on their helmets!

[Venomousmonkey]

Cool idea and very unique placement of the troops in England. My only issue is "Or the two front war France is fighting against both the Milanese and the Scots"

I See English and Milanese but no scots.
Just figured I'd mention it so you could fix if that's what you meant. Cheers.

[Asdrubaal]

Cool idea and very unique placement of the troops in England. My only issue is "Or the two front war France is fighting against both the Milanese and the Scots"

I See English and Milanese but no scots.
Just figured I'd mention it so you could fix if that's what you meant. Cheers.

Looks like I did cut the image, the Scots are at Bourdeax (their only settlement), you can see where they are on the first picture minimap, mind you that they are only a minor player, the real players are the French and the Milanese.

[Asdrubaal]

T80


After destroying Scotland the French are able to turn their armies to the eastern front, where Milan is keeping the pressure

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The three-way war on the Hellespont keeps going on, Constantinople changing hands repeatedly, will any of the three nations be able to hold it and obtain victory?

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The Reich keeps its iron boot over Hungary’s head but although peace with the Milanese has been obtained the Poles are helping their Magyar cousins and threatening the Empire's northern front

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Thought once able to destroy Spain Portugal has seen the winds change and now faces almost sure destruction at Spanish hands

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The Turk-Egyptian war is still being fought but none of the two fighters is really trying to destroy the other, both knowing that the war will left the survivor really weakened and unable to protect itself .

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Book of the Moors

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Sultan Qasim
Entry nº 60 on the book of our nation
I have governed our glorious island nation for three years, since the death of my brother Miswar I have peacefully governed and traded with the nations of the mainland, they trade with us but I know that they secretly hate us, the fair haired barbarians from the east, the Danes as they call themselves have been preparing for battle, we will not accept this defiance, if we need to fight so it will be, the Danes will die on the cold waters of the sea to never be seen again.
….
Sultan Aban
Entry nº 80 on the book of our nation
Today I write my first entry on our history, I am Sultan Aban, son of Sultan Hachim, the one the Danes called “The Malevolent” due to his great victories against Danish fleets and his terrible assaults on all their ports, always prepared he always destroyed their navies, always imposing economic retaliation on them, and those barbarians always attacking us shortly after, those eastern madmen have a real passion for dying on sea, and we will fulfil their wish, for anyone who dares attack our people will find our ships, our bows, our swords and our crossbows prepared, our people trusts us and we won’t fail them, let the enemy come, we will be waiting…

Remember the Misterious Dialogue? Looks like it has some relation to this one.

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….
-Come on Sithy, stop playing with your dad’s dolls, come here, look, this sword is for you, I’ve found a great sword master for you, I’m sure you will love the class, now go, remember that today you have naval instruction at the port.
-‘kay mum.
-Miswaaar! How many times do I have to tell you to keep those dolls far from my daughter!?
-b-b-b-but I thought that…
-You? Thinking? Don’t make me laugh, what were you trying to do? Turn her into one of those silly European princesses? If you want a dress you can have it, but it’s you who will wear it, not our daughter.
-But dear, people already call her the rose of Albion, you will ruin her with all this training.
-Nonsense! And if she is a rose the faster she gets spikes the better, or do you want to leave her without any defences with perverts like my second cousin around.
-Of c-c-course not, I j-j-just thought that a bit of finesse would be good for her.
-Finesse? Then find another way, no dolls and no dresses, maybe you could try art? But remember, if I find any other doll in this house I will use your eyeballs as earrings, I am clear?
-Y-y-yes dear, I’m going to search for the paints, maybe she will be an artist.
-And maybe one day I will decide to kill you, make sure I don’t get any reasons for doing such thing.
….

The family tree of the Moors:

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Genealogic tree of the Moor kingdom of Albion
Sultan Tahar oo Ghayda
-Sultan Miswar, called “The Honourable” by our peope oo Hassiba
·Prince Faraj oo Bakka
.Princess Najia Chadili oo Miswar Chadilli
,Princess Sithy Chadili
·Princess Zahra of Murcia oo Khaled of Murcia
·Prince Saed(killed in battle) oo Meysun
·Princess Najet of Morocco oo Ayub of Morocco(killed in battle)
.Crown princess Saduf of Tlemcen oo Tamim of Tlemcen
-Sultan Qasim oo Saheena
·Sultana Zizi al-Mursi oo Hachim, called “The Malevolent” by the Danes(killed in battle)
.Sultan Aban oo Kahina al-Mursi
·Princess Banujah al-Andalusi oo Abdelatif al-Andalusi
·Princess Ummu of Orán oo Asbat of Orán
-Prince Ayyub oo Zhor
·Prince Da’ud, called “the luxurious” by the workers of the red district of Edimburg(killed in battle)
·Princess Sagirah Filali oo Azedine, called “The Cuckold” by everyone
.Prince Muhammad Filali oo Hasna Filali
,Prince Haddad Filali
.Prince Yazid Filali oo Bouchra Filali
.Princess Myassa al-Dani oo Alí al-Dani
,Prince Smail al-Dani
,Prince Abdu’llah al-Dani

[Asdrubaal]

Well, looks like I have lost interest in this campaign, I also don’t like the writing style nor the plot so I have decided to put this in stand by, the save is in a safe place so if I want to I can return to this anytime, right now I just don’t like how It’s going so I will leave it until (or if) I feel like returning to it.