Ask me, President Vladimir Putin, a Question

[Roma_Victrix]

Здравствуйте и хорошее здоровье (greetings and good health). This President Vladimir Putin of Russian Federation. I will be answerings many general queries you may having.



I will accept question from journalists of every nationality...except Ukrainian, they displeases me. I will try to answering as straightforwardly as possibles, but I make no assurance it answer you like. After all, Russia cannot give away secret...especially in sensitive issue regarding Russia militaries.

Also, do not be alarmed by armed guards behind me. They here for my protection; they no threat to journalists. Trust Putin.

[Sir Adrian]

Gospodin Putin, why you hate Romanians? If you do not top hating romanians do you agree to poshel na turbinka chert?

[Roma_Victrix]

Gospodin Putin, why you hate Romanians? If you do not top hating romanians do you agree to poshel na turbinka chert?

Little Owl Man,

There no reason for nasty. I not surprise, though, comings from you, since you Rumynskiy peoples have long legacy of mastering impolite speech to your betters as art form. Румыния...such troubled place. I should answer your question with question: why Nicolae Ceaușescu turn back on great Sovetskiy Soyuz? Or for English friends here...Soviet Union? I believe you find answer there, little owl man.

Why no one else have questionings? Putin get impatient soon. TWC would do well not test patience of President.

[Diamat]

Are you my father? Did you have intercourse with an East German female (in 1986) while stationed in Dresden?

[The Useless Member]

inb4lock

Would you rather restore the Soviet Union, like the press is accusing you of, or restore the Russian Empire?

[Bo1Bo1Sha3]

Is it true Russians are not slavs but weird Altaic tribes that came into contact with what would become ukrainians and picked up and spoke a strange version of their language?

[Roma_Victrix]

Are you my father? Did you have intercourse with an East German female (in 1986) while stationed in Dresden?

Like other President, Clinton, I will answer similar: "I did not have sexual relations with that woman." I hope this suffice. That said, please tell her Vladimir say hello, and to give me back wristwatch. It very sentimental to me...gift from old KGB friend.

inb4lock

Would you rather restore the Soviet Union, like the press is accusing you of, or restore the Russian Empire?

Unlike Confederatski Amerikanski 'Rebels' who say "South Will Rise Again," unfortunately Soviet Union does not same. Tsars are also history, done with. However, new kind of empire may rise under careful guidance of party United Russia (Еди́ная Росси́я; Yedinaya Rossiya).

Is it true Russians are not slavs but weird Altaic tribes that came into contact with what would become ukrainians and picked up and spoke a strange version of their language?

Who told you this things? Maybe clown Prime Minister Arseniy Yatsenyuk in Kiev say these? Foolish. Russians have great history that separate from Kievan Rus; we didn't need piggy back off their legacy. We Russians also have Viking ancestry, like those founded Veliky Novgorod, but we don't speaks Germanic language.

[Soothsayer]

Is Belarus still kissing your ass?

[Roma_Victrix]

Is Belarus still kissing your ass?

I should not have to dignify with response, this not funny joke. Belarus is great and loyal brother to Russian Federation; it enjoy great relationship. Yes, it smaller country, but Russia give great respect.

That said, Belarussian President Alexander Lukashenko say things recently which upset me, and he should know that those most loyal rewarded with strongest friendship. Let him know that problems with Ukraine only, not with Belarus. Lukashenko good old soldier, but if he continue to say things displeasings me, then perhaps it can be arranged he do his other old agricultural job of runnings farm instead. I am Vladimir Putin...anything can be arranged.

Let us hope Lukashenko does not doing foolish thing against ethnic Russian people of Belarus. Then Russian Federation might have to step in and keep safe their freedom with referendum. Belarus Oblast...it have nice ring to it.

[Ciciro]

Is it true you got a divorce because you had an affair with a bear?

[Roma_Victrix]

Is it true you got a divorce because you had an affair with a bear?

WHO TELL YOU THIS? No-good ex wife Lyudmila Aleksandrovna Putina say such thing? It unfounded and totalling untrue.

That said, bear is majestic creature, symbol of Russia, should be respected with utmost courtesy, and by all people treated affectionately. Very affectionately.

[Roma_Victrix]

Well, Putin sleepy. Even President must catching shut eye. Off to bed. But know this...I sleeping with one eye shut, one eye open. I keep eye on you TWC. Make sure conduct befitting that of presence of real president. No more fun games. Ask respectable questionings.

Goodnight, or how we say in Russia, Спокойной ночи!

[IZob]

Vladimir Putin isn't welcomed here.

[Bo1Bo1Sha3]

How many cigarettes do you smoke a minute?

[Lord Oda Nobunaga]

Putin dono, why are you so inconsistent? You said that Kievan Rus is not Russia even though some press conferences ago you said that Kievan Rus and Ukrainian people are the closest to Russia and that Ukraine and Russia should be closer still?

Also why do you speak well of Stalin dono even though you also say that he was a dictator that committed many crimes?

Why do you also speak well of the USSR even though you secretly despise the Communists and drop hints about it constantly?

Why do you not simply make an alliance with Rumania by granting them Transnistria and Moldovia in exchange for their recognizing the annexation of Crimea or any future Ukrainian projects. I believe you read about my many great political maneuvres where I have crippled the mightiest of daimyo with my sneaky offers.

Finally I am increasingly disturbed by your image (mostly internet perception) of you as a super human all mighty leader. Everyone knows that I am Lord of the Heavens and the Demon King of the Sixth Heaven and Guardian of the door to the almighty Seventh Heaven after the fires that I lit ripped my spirit from its flesh. As the Supreme Commander of the Nippon Taikoku since 1573 and the very first to put down the revolutionary fanatics I say that you as leader of United Russia are no match for my Tenka Fubu campaign. If you do not acknowledge my position as Lord of the Heavens then I will be forced to engage myself in a war against your heresy and will use my Dairokuten Mao powers to summon my undead samurai hordes and declare a holy war upon you. Be warned Vladimir dono or I shall destroy you Yama Yama Tani Tani.

[Rijul.J.Ballal]

Is it true your stance against Homosexuality is due to own hidden latent homosexuality?

[napoleon boneaparte]

Dear President Putin, wouldn't it be better to solve your disputes with Obama with a duel?

[Roma_Victrix]

Vladimir Putin isn't welcomed here.

You, comrade, are now welcome to Siberia. Enjoy stay.

How many cigarettes do you smoke a minute?

Contrarily to your believing, I do not smokes cigarettes. Is bad for health. However...If I did, I would smoke one a minute, in reasonable fashion, with stylish cigarette holder. Smoke should be inhaling and exhaling slowly, like time between vodka shot. No need to make fool of self to prove point, like this:

Putin dono, why are you so inconsistent? You said that Kievan Rus is not Russia even though some press conferences ago you said that Kievan Rus and Ukrainian people are the closest to Russia and that Ukraine and Russia should be closer still?

Is true that Ukrainian people and Russians are very close; of this there is no doubt. For instances, Ukrainian people speak bastardising offshoot of real Russian language.

Also why do you speak well of Stalin dono even though you also say that he was a dictator that committed many crimes?

Stalin to us is like Mao to Chinese; 30% bad, 70% good. He still havings legacy which good in part.

Why do you also speak well of the USSR even though you secretly despise the Communists and drop hints about it constantly?

USSR very powerful, more so unfortunately than Russian federation. It is these we emulates and aspiring to...size...power...and big bears.

Why do you not simply make an alliance with Rumania by granting them Transnistria and Moldovia in exchange for their recognizing the annexation of Crimea or any future Ukrainian projects. I believe you read about my many great political maneuvres where I have crippled the mightiest of daimyo with my sneaky offers.

For simple reason: Romania not deserve Transnistria and Moldova. Annexing Crimea separate affair and does not need legitimacy handed from Romanians. Is country filled with disrespectful little owl men as you see in post #2 above. Such country not deserve recognitions from Russian Federation. If Russia want more of Ukraine, Russia take more of Ukraine. I assure you, not for reason of realpolotik, but to safeguard ethnic Russians people oppressed by foreigner country.

Finally I am increasingly disturbed by your image (mostly internet perception) of you as a super human all mighty leader. Everyone knows that I am Lord of the Heavens and the Demon King of the Sixth Heaven and Guardian of the door to the almighty Seventh Heaven after the fires that I lit ripped my spirit from its flesh.

Vladimir not afraid of man who had gutting himself because his little samurai Akechi outsmarts him at Honno-ji.

Is it true your stance against Homosexuality is due to own hidden latent homosexuality?

You would make funny comedian...funny comedian in Siberia.

Russian people know best; they not trust the homosexual, which make big agenda in EU and US. Russia not fall prey to same tricking.

Dear President Putin, wouldn't it be better to solve your disputes by Obama with a duel?

Is not bad idea, sounds manly, yes. Of course, I win in duel, because Obama is girl.

[Verr]

dear mr putin , why didnt you turn to jesus christ, stayed within your holy marriage and became emperor/king by the grace of god?

[Roma_Victrix]

dear mr putin , why didnt you turn to jesus christ, stayed within your holy marriage and became emperor/king by the grace of god?

What do you Nemetskiy peoples in Germaniya know about the one true church?



Besides, I makes it perfectly clears that I president, not Tsar. Such comparison is childishness and political hack job by opponents who paint me as tyrant. I not tyrant, I am beings good guy.