Looks good, everyone!
So does Strenge know he's getting reviewed or can I warn and congratule him on his thread.
This is my Aragonese AAR, One Single Man
If you read and comment, there WILL be cake!
Ah, I do know by now, because I found Juvenal's PM, which brought me here. Well, I feel kind of humbled having been reviewed by such an established writer as Radzeer (will rep him in a minute), all the more since I have been slack lately with updates. Well, a particular member of the female gender is to blame, so whoever will accept that kind of thing as an excuse shall take it as such. However, I have quite some material prepared and played ahead a bit, so there should be another update before the end of February.
Concerning the content of the review, I am grateful for every suggestion. Indeed, I have not been very consistent with the cropping of my screenshots, as far as the UI is concerned. This was because initially I sometimes wanted the reader to be able to see some details there, such as the current amount of gold in the treasury or - in battles - the current state of affairs on the minimap or which units were involved in fighting at the time of the screenshot. However, it seems that consistency is the better way to go, so I will cut that little bit of extra information out from here going onwards. Also in the beginning, I did not know how to make the grey arrows disappear, but I have learned how to do that in the meantime. And as to the number of screenshots in the battle reports - I sometimes was so immersed in the battle that I forgot to take enough of them. Well, I am still a beginner and will hopefully become better at this as well.
So, all in all I found the review very helpful and will try to incorporate Radzeer's hints and suggestions. It may not be right in the next updates, though, since I have already cropped most of the pictures for those and the battles obviously have been fought and cannot be redone.
Last edited by Strengelicher; February 23, 2013 at 08:31 AM.
What a nice surprise! Excellent work, everybody!
@ Strengelicher: I think you have a very good story with a nice balance. I really enjoyed reviewing it, and I'm looking forward to reading more!
[AAR] The Wolf Among Dogs - The Latin Empire *In progress* (Reviewed by HeirofAlexander)
[AAR] Primus Inter Pares - The Kievan Rus *Completed* (Reviewed by Thokran)
[AAR] The Chronicle of a Hungarian Freeman *Completed* (Reviewed by la coupe est pleine)
~ The Writers' Study ~ MAARC ~ TotW ~ The Collected Wisdom of AAR Writing ~ My work ~
Following the footsteps of Hesus de bodemloze and bringing Robin de Bodemloze along
Glad it's finally here!
Great work everyone!
Cool! Great work everyone.
[Col] The Kybrothilian
Best subforum: http://www.twcenter.net/forums/forum...hp?60-Coliseum
If you are interested in reading an AAR that also let you decide its course, visit here: http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showt...ticipative-AAR
This artist is awesome (warning: some artwork contain nudity): http://syrsa.deviantart.com/
"So long as you are a slave to the opinions of the many you have not yet approached freedom or tasted its nectar."
-Flavius Claudius Julianus
"The people that once bestowed commands, consulships, legions, and all else, now concerns itself no more, and longs eagerly for just two things - bread and circuses!"
-Decimus Junius Juvenalis
"A time will come when the whole world will go mad. And to anyone who is not mad, they will say:'You are mad, for you are not like us'"
-Prophet Muhammed (p.b.u.h.)
Awesome! This is, believe or not, the first time I have actually ever checked out the Quill before. I feel honored that my AAR received a review, and a great one at that! Currently the AAR is still fairly early on as mentioned by The Kybrothilian and since my time has been best spent focusing on my classes right now (midterms are going to kill me...), it's kind of staying right at the end of the First Punic War until I get a bit more time to put into the final 2 parts. Hopefully I'll get some real free time to work on it, but in the meantime it is awesome to see the review and critique so I can think of what I would like to add into the ext few chapters. I assure you some dialogue will be coming in shortly, I just have to make sure I know how to implement it in a fashion that compliments the historical accuracy of the AAR (The first triumvirate and the generalship of Gaius Marius look to be very interesting as far as the politics should go, but those won't be for some time). I'll try to see how dialogue could be potentially added between consuls or other senators (or possibly other individuals depending on the situation) into the next few chapters to add to some character depth and to try and bring this AAR closer to novel than history book.
Thank you again for the interest, and thanks to Kybrothilian for the excellent review!
So great to see this publication after being away from the TWC for a bit. And my own work included? A pleasant surprise indeed!
Shankbot, you're too kind. I'm glad to see that I wasn't being toooo subtle with some of the ideas I wanted to get across. Although, I wouldn't exactly say that the subject is necessarily unstable (although I definitely see how one gets there), more that he subscribes to an ideology that God's blessing justifies his own actions. I suppose I let my own critique of some religious thought slip in a bit.
Thanks to all for their hard work here! I enjoyed reading.
Ah I see, I did wonder what the hidden sort of message was. Reading back I get where you're coming from, shame I didn't pick up on it.
Glad you liked the review, it was a pleasure to do.
There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)