The Hobbit: An Unexpected Fail: End of Book 3 5th April

[Flinn]

"The jedi easily sliced the orcs to pieces, the deadliest weapon the orcs had was a broken bottle."

[Bowmaster]

Brilliant!!! +rep.

[Lortano]

Chapter 4 is up for book 3!

On a wave of a youtube uploading frenzy I have come back to unleash comedy!

[Lortano]

Chapter 5: The Cunning Plan is up!

[Flinn]

I can finally add some more rep to you

please do not stop

F

[Lortano]

Chapter 6: The ruined fortress is up!

Sorry I've been away, I was in Germany for a week!

[Captain Zoran]

Man, ever considered a career in this?

+rep!

[Lortano]

Man, ever considered a career in this?

+rep!

No...no I have not. My desire in life is to become a lawyer, not a comic. I'd likely end up like Adam Sandler if I ever did comedy professionally.

[Captain Zoran]

No...no I have not. My desire in life is to become a lawyer, not a comic. I'd likely end up like Adam Sandler if I ever did comedy professionally.

No reasons for it to end that badly... most of the time Ever read Terry Pratchett for instance?

[Lortano]

Book 4: Chapter 1 is up!

Cheers to you all!

[Lortano]

Book 4: Chapter 2 is up!

[AnthonyRawrz69]

Hahahahaha your stories are incredible and hilarious keep up the good work!!!

[Lortano]

If I post two chapters or so and see any comments from anyone, especially someone who hasn't posted on my stories before, then it gives me the motivation to carry on. I am just slowing down the pace a little bit, because it's another 6 months before the next Hobbit film is released and I don't want to burn through the content!

[muller227]

I am pretty sure the only thing lacking in this is a suitably aggrieved super MarySue of course with the most ridiculous back story ever concocted. Anyway this going well.

[Lortano]

You do realise you have given me a most spectacular idea......oh yes, I really do have an excellent idea...

[Lortano]

Chapter 3 is up now!

[Lortano]

Chapter 4 is up!

[Flinn]

"As the dust settled the orcs began to pick themselves up. Some offered each other limbs, asking if the limbs belonged to the respective person. Some looted the dead, some looted the dying, and some looted the ones that were looting the corpses, in order to create the possibility of a lootception joke."

[Lortano]

I don't know what's more ridiculous, the fact that the orcs offered each other limbs, or the fact that Radagast had blades in his sleigh anyway.

[Lortano]

Chapter 5: The Troll hoard is up! Please comment, it gives me a sense of self worth!