Absolutely Despise My Roommate

[Mr. Scott]

Ok, so here's the deal. I signed up for the summer program at the university I will be attending this fall and got a roommate, cool right? It's been a week now, and I already hate him. I thank god that the Summer is only 8 weeks and that he's out of the dorm a lot. Ok, so now for a bit of explaining my situation, and in some ways venting lol.

I take pride in being a tolerant guy and very easy-going, but this guy is really testing my limits.

He is seriously annoying as all heck. For one thing, he's super insanely needy and *****y. Seriously, like he complains about everything and is insanely effeminate. He cries over the smallest things and I just have to sit there and nod in confirmation. He's also insanely gay. Now, I have no problem with gays (obviously lol), but he's not like me or many other gay people. He's the *****y and gossipy kind and its incredibly irritating. 24/7 he's gossiping loudly with his friends on Skype or talking about some hot professor or Darren Chris (I know right...)... and it freaking bugs the living hell out of me. Basically, he's the kind of person that exacerbates the gay stereotype and makes us all look bad...

Even worse he has awful hygiene. He has a strange odor and horrible teeth and only showered twice in the last 7 days. Whenever I'm playing music softly, he'll start pounding his music and try to play it louder than mine. Seriously, I tested it out. When I turned my volume up, he turned his way up in order to block mine out. He also cusses non-stop throwing F-bombs everywhere. I have no problem with people cussing, but seriously, when you say the F-word 4 times in one sentence, you're being excessive

Oh but this isn't even the worst of it. Just a few days ago, he pronounced feelings for me. Like what is he doing! We're roommates! Nonetheless, it freaked the living out of me and I didn't really say anything.

When I signed up for this program I did not sign up for all the drama that this kid brings and all the constant irritation. I haven't yet snapped at him, but I'm starting to reach my capacity to remain pleasant...

Ok... so now the venting is done...
So basically, what should I do? I mean, I doubt that they'd let me re-assign given the short duration of the program. Should I just avoid him and try and study away from the dorm?

[Phier]

he pronounced feelings for me

Ticket to a new room. Go to the RA and say "(Whatshisname) expressed his attraction to me and it is making me very uncomfortable, I'd really like to change rooms".

Its one thing if your room mate is a smelly slob, they will tell you to suck it up, its another if they hit on you, that gets them into "dangerous" territory if something bad happens, you reported it, and they didn't help you out.

[Sųren]

New room time.

[John F. Kennedy]

As others of said, talk to your RA about getting a new room. If you bring up he has feelings for you and that makes you uncomfortable, that's more than enough reason to justify a change.

P.S. Might I ask which university you are attending for this program?

[hellheaven1987]

I don't know roommates cannot involve in romance...

[piet]

Familiarize yourself with Title 9. So far your roommate has not crossed the line into Title 9 territory, but if these statements are repeated you may have grounds.

I'd start with your RA to discover who can help. You might also see if there is a student advocacy office/representitive.

[The Vitiated Mind]

Maybe he even uses your pc and looks at your history .

[trance]

So, what we have here is a walking gay stereotype who smells horrible and wants to bone you? Sounds like the beginning of a really bad comedy . No but really, either cleanse it with fire or go to the appropriate instance and change room ASAP. Is there any mates/relatives you can live with while the matter is processed?

Also, yeah, you could try to just stay out of the dorm as much as possible.

[Mr. Scott]

As others of said, talk to your RA about getting a new room. If you bring up he has feelings for you and that makes you uncomfortable, that's more than enough reason to justify a change.

P.S. Might I ask which university you are attending for this program?

Oh, the University of California Berkeley . So far I absolutely love the school, city, and people... except for my roommate...

So, what we have here is a walking gay stereotype who smells horrible and wants to bone you? Sounds like the beginning of a really bad comedy . No but really, either cleanse it with fire or go to the appropriate instance and change room ASAP. Is there any mates/relatives you can live with while the matter is processed?

Also, yeah, you could try to just stay out of the dorm as much as possible.

Well, things haven't exactly broken down between us, but its more along the lines that I simply despise him. I may be able to get out though given how he has feelings for me... that only made things all the more uncomfortable.

Well he's rarely in the dorm and I'm out a lot of the time too, so I have managed to keep our interactions at a minimum.

Maybe he even uses your pc and looks at your history .

That thing is locked down like Bill Gate's Gym Room!

[John F. Kennedy]

I don't know roommates cannot involve in romance...

Not if only one party wants romance and the other does not, and it becomes a problem.

[Gen. Chris]

First off, I'd like to say that it is nice to hear a homosexual person say they get annoyed with the behavior of the overly gay men. Whenever I say that gays annoy me, other people don't understand my lingo...I mean that the people like your roommate annoy the hell out of me. I have no problem with homosexuals in general.

ANYWAY, I would suggest talking to the RA, but make ABSOLUTE SURE that he will not try to call a meeting or anything to solve the problem unless you say so. My RA last year liked to take things into his own hands whenever we talked to him about problems. There are some overzealous RAs...So be sure to let him know you are just discussing possible options.

Hygiene is not exactly something you can bring up easily, and I can't tell you what to do for that.

For music, that's an easy enough fix...Headphones . But I would bring that up with him in someway, or to the RA.

For him being *****y and his feelings, there's definitely nothing that can be said without hurting his feelings, which I would imagine would make things much worse.

All in all, I would really talk to your RA. But, as I said, make sure he/she understands that you just want to talk about the problem, and you don't want a meeting or anything called without your say so. That will only make the situation more awkward, and wouldn't be worth it unless you asked for it, in my opinion.

[StealthFox]

I thank god that the Summer is only 8 weeks and that he's out of the dorm a lot. Ok, so now for a bit of explaining my situation, and in some ways venting lol.

So basically, what should I do? I mean, I doubt that they'd let me re-assign given the short duration of the program. Should I just avoid him and try and study away from the dorm?

Maybe actually being summer will work in your favor. Summer means students go home, which means lots of empty dorms.

[Gen. Chris]

Maybe actually being summer will work in your favor. Summer means students go home, which means lots of empty dorms.

But only a handful are kept open for summer session...At least that's how it works at my school. I'm in California as well so I doubt it is all that different.

[Lord Baal]

Well I understand you. I have two annoying potato heads for interns that are freaking the live out of me!!! They are disgusting in their own little ways... but unlike you I have too see them 10 hours every day...

[piet]

If there is any place which would be overly sensitive to the issuses Mr. Scott is having here it will be California. And if there is anyplace likely to have student advocacy available it will be California.

Or you can just try to tough it out. There are libraries to study in and commons to nap in.

You could also try setting some room "rules" that you both agree to follow, yeah I know that may be a stretch, but at this point what have you got to lose?

Good Luck (and maybe count to 10 a lot)

[fkizz]

Seems like the beginning of a loving romance relationship. Your dislike will turn into like, you'll find you're just afraid of admitting your feelings about him..

Nah just kidding mate. More seriously, your only solution is to seriously try to find a new room, with whatever means you have avaliable, it might be a matter of time before he does another romantic move on you, which, jokes aside, can be a very annoying way to live, adding everything you've said to the equation. Not to mention if he was serious when he confessed his feelings, things can get more complicated, and more drama can be incoming.

If you can't, spend more time on the street, outside, with your friends, since the program is short duration like you said, it will be over fairly soon.

[Nazgūl Killer]

I can only reaffirm what others have said. You should definitely go to the RA and ask to be moved to a new room, this hatred you have for him can't bring good.

You could try and get along with him, but if you truly despise him already, I don't think that will help. Avoiding the problem, rather than facing it, sounds like the right thing to do for you. If I were you I'd try and 'educate' him, take him as a personal project of mine to set him straight (No pun intended ) and confront him... But that's because I have a weird personality.

The best move would be to move.

[boofhead]

Ok, so here's the deal. I signed up for the summer program at the university I will be attending this fall and got a roommate, cool right? It's been a week now, and I already hate him. I thank god that the Summer is only 8 weeks and that he's out of the dorm a lot. Ok, so now for a bit of explaining my situation, and in some ways venting lol.

I take pride in being a tolerant guy and very easy-going, but this guy is really testing my limits.

He is seriously annoying as all heck. For one thing, he's super insanely needy and *****y. Seriously, like he complains about everything and is insanely effeminate. He cries over the smallest things and I just have to sit there and nod in confirmation. He's also insanely gay. Now, I have no problem with gays (obviously lol), but he's not like me or many other gay people. He's the *****y and gossipy kind and its incredibly irritating. 24/7 he's gossiping loudly with his friends on Skype or talking about some hot professor or Darren Chris (I know right...)... and it freaking bugs the living hell out of me. Basically, he's the kind of person that exacerbates the gay stereotype and makes us all look bad...

Even worse he has awful hygiene. He has a strange odor and horrible teeth and only showered twice in the last 7 days. Whenever I'm playing music softly, he'll start pounding his music and try to play it louder than mine. Seriously, I tested it out. When I turned my volume up, he turned his way up in order to block mine out. He also cusses non-stop throwing F-bombs everywhere. I have no problem with people cussing, but seriously, when you say the F-word 4 times in one sentence, you're being excessive

Oh but this isn't even the worst of it. Just a few days ago, he pronounced feelings for me. Like what is he doing! We're roommates! Nonetheless, it freaked the living out of me and I didn't really say anything.

When I signed up for this program I did not sign up for all the drama that this kid brings and all the constant irritation. I haven't yet snapped at him, but I'm starting to reach my capacity to remain pleasant...

Ok... so now the venting is done...
So basically, what should I do? I mean, I doubt that they'd let me re-assign given the short duration of the program. Should I just avoid him and try and study away from the dorm?

That sounds like a hellish nightmare . I'd rather be in prison or sleep outside in the bushes.

Get out, for the sake of your sanity.

[Mr. Scott]

I can only reaffirm what others have said. You should definitely go to the RA and ask to be moved to a new room, this hatred you have for him can't bring good.

You could try and get along with him, but if you truly despise him already, I don't think that will help. Avoiding the problem, rather than facing it, sounds like the right thing to do for you. If I were you I'd try and 'educate' him, take him as a personal project of mine to set him straight (No pun intended ) and confront him... But that's because I have a weird personality.

The best move would be to move.

Hmmm I'm tempted to do this a bit . I'm thinking of making a game... how much bi**chness I can tolerate before I snap. Hey, being gay myself, I'll probably have to deal with his type more than I'd like, so maybe I should start building up a tolerance now .

Luckily the guy is the size of a twig so he definitely can't do anything

[Nazgūl Killer]

The question is: Are you truly willing to go through this? I mean, to 'tolerate' someone as you put it that lives with you and you're with him 24/7 takes a lot of dedication. I'd admire you if you decided to actually try and 'teach' him, and that would be admirable... But as I've said, in your case, you're better off just moving.