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Thread: The Critic's Quill: Issue 26

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    Default The Critic's Quill: Issue 26


    Issue 26 - Part 1
    Hello and welcome to Issue 26 of the Quill.

    Well, the Scriptorium Japan Writing Competition is over and the lucky winners have received their rewards. So I think the time has come to show you what we think of them! We have also been lucky enough to have a completed MAARC (XXVI) to report on, and Mega Tortas provides a round-up of another month of frenetic Tale of the Week activity.

    Did you know that CA have released a new Total War Game? It takes a little while for this kind of news to filter down to the dusty corridors of the Quill Pressroom. I'm an RTW man myself, with an occasional dabble in M2TW. I haven't yet finished Road to Independence, and Napoleon is still well over the horizon for me.

    Anyway, some of the younger and more dynamic members of the Quill seem to think we should be covering things Shogunic, so in order to oblige them I have decided to declare this issue a SHOGUN SPECIAL EDITION!

    Carloginias has reviewed some historical fiction about Samurai. Radzeer has been kind enough to make a survey of all the new Shogun 2 AARs. Skantarios, Carloginias and myself are covering the Scriptorium Japan competition. Sadly not everyone can be torn away from their obsessions: la coupe est pleine remains stuck fast in the Middle Ages, where he has found time to review Kingdom of Heaven. wowbanger is currently fixated on the works of Tolkien. This month he reviews some of the substantial portfolio of Tolkien fan-fiction stories created by Inarus.

    We also have a whole bevy of articles this month. Beer Money turns his interviewing spot-light onto Radzeer. Thokran tells us how to get over writer's block. Boustrophedon amazes us with an in-depth treatise on Theme and Motif in fiction. Karnage gives us the benefit of some of his hard-won lessons in becoming an AARtist. Finally dezikeizer treats us to a valuable list of internet sources for aspiring writers of historical fiction.

    Unsurprisingly, given the above, the Quill is again too big to fit in one post, so I have put all the reviews and news here, and the articles in the next post. You will find links to everything in the table of contents below.

    Juvenal (Editor)

    Table of Contents


    Work Critiques Section

    Scriptorium Competition Japan: Winning Stories
    Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

    Every time a Scriptorium competition comes up, I fire off an entry hoping against hope that I will finally win one of their famed medals (never happens though). However this time I just didn't feel equipped to write anything convincing about Japan, but at least I am spared the disappointment of failure!

    But less of me and more of those brave souls who did enter and whose work was popular enough to have reached the final stages. Skantarios has kindly provided some reviews of his own, so you will be treated to both our opinions... stereo reviews! A kind of literary hi-fi perhaps?


    Librarian's Choice Award: The Origins of Japanese Emperors by Supermoler

    Juvenal Review
    This is the story of the deities Hoori and Hoderi, who were also brothers, and of how Hoori came to be the founder of the line of Japanese Emperors.

    It is a oddly written story, containing unfamiliar words and phrases (what on earth is a fish-hitch?), as if translated literally into English. I can only assume this effect is intentional because the author, despite having English as a second tongue, has produced many other much more comprehensible pieces.

    The tenses wander between simple present (“Ho-ori went to the sea to fish”) and perfect present (“Ho-ori has thrown away the enchanted fish-hitch”) and back again, with a little bit of past tense (“Ho-dei was not so happy about this idea”) thrown in for good measure.

    I think it is the oddness of the language with gives this tale much of its charm, it gives the setting an alien ambience where the reader can believe that anything at all might happen at any time.

    Although I enjoyed the story of Hoori and Hoderi, I felt it was rather incomplete due to the omission of most of the events regarding the Sea God Ryijin and his daughter Toyotama-hime. This left the final section feeling rushed and the ending rather abrupt. Indeed it failed to actually mention at all how Hoori came to be the ancestor of the Japanese Emperors (which was by way of his son with Toyotama-hime).

    Had the ending been stronger, then I am sure this story could have made the top three.


    Fiction Second Runner-up: Betrayal at Utsunomiya by Destroyer83

    Skantarios Review
    This is a nice story about two brothers split by one’s betrayal in the shifting tides of war in Japan. The story is narrated by the younger brother who has stayed loyal to the Shimazu clan while his older (and more famous) brother has switched sides to the hated Date. It tells of the aftermath of the older brother’s betrayal and sets the scene for the final showdown between the two and their respective armies.

    My biggest criticism is that I would have liked to see more of the older brother’s motivation for switching sides. The presumption (at least on my part) is that he has betrayed his clan and his brother for personal glory and wealth (both time-honored motives for betrayal). However, his casual dismissal of his brother is a little hard to accept. The older brother assumes that his younger brother would follow him into treachery but then quickly states that his brother just wouldn’t fit. I guess I would have liked a couple more lines of justification – but that might just be me. Then again, maybe the older brother really is just a conceited bastard and no further explanation is needed?

    The rest of the story is good. It sets up a confrontation in the near future between the traitorous older brother with the forces of Date and the loyal younger brother with the forces of Shimazu. Will the younger brother emerge from the shadow of his brother and restore the family honor or will evil and greed triumph? I kind of want to see how it turns out.

    Juvenal Review
    A story of two brothers, of betrayal and of revenge.

    Faced with a large block of text, I felt I needed to introduce spaces between the paragraphs for easier reading. It was well worth it because this is a good story.

    The use of very short single-phrase paragraphs as end-caps for the main account was quite effective. I feel that they created an implied rhythm which gave the piece as a whole more weight and significance

    I think the introductory paragraph would have been better in present tense, to better contrast with the flash-back account which follows.

    Some colloquialisms intruded on my sense of immersion: “me and my brother”, “Sincerely yours”.
    I wasn't convinced that it was necessary to distinguish between generals and daimyos, and anyway is general even an appropriate word to use for this period?

    Nevertheless the story has an epic ambience and there is a strong feeling that the protagonist is playing out a role preordained for him. Also I was left with the profound belief that the protagonist would win this fated battle against his brother, despite his admission in the text to be the lesser talent “My older Brother, Shimazo Hanada, was always the best at everything, I admired his skill and strength, and to be truthful, I still admire him”.


    Fiction First Runner-up: Tea Ceremony by daniu

    Skantarios Review
    The “Tea Ceremony” is a very nice story. It tells the tale of a Daimyo and his mistress who is under suspicion by the Daimyo’s advisors. However, the Daimyo is clearly infatuated with the woman and trusts her implicitly – to his own detriment as it turns out.

    Like most short stories, there is a lack of details. This is mostly because it is a short story. The lack of wording lets the reader fill in the details using their own imagination. That is kind of nice as there are several different scenarios and backgrounds we can interpose over the story.

    The dialogue is a little out of place. The mistress makes public statements that would be quite presumptuous and out of character for the social conventions of the age. However, the Daimyo appears to be so enamored of the woman that he brushes them off with barely a comment. Really, her own words should have been his first clue that there was more to this woman than met the eye. On the other hand, the dialogue from his advisor is well done. There is just enough there to show that he feels he has fulfilled his duty even at personal peril – as a samurai should – even if his master won’t listen.

    One other criticism is that the title is somewhat strange. A traditional “Tea Ceremony” between a man and a woman was done very privately in specially constructed Tea Houses (sometimes built just for a single ceremony by the man). The story implies that there are multiple other servants and others in attendance which is completely out of place. Having a mistress pour tea is in a ceremonial hall one thing, having a “Tea Ceremony” is something entirely different. Even so, the story is a good one with a nice twist at the end.

    Good job.

    Juvenal Review
    A story describing a Daimyo's reaction to a whistle-blower

    This is a good example of the cautionary tale. It starts immediately at the point of crisis and there is hardly time to breath as it makes its way inexorably toward a conclusion most readers have probably already anticipated (but still most satisfying none-the-less).

    There is no introduction or exposition as that would just interrupt the flow of the story. Instead the context is introduced in-passing as the plot unfolds. The various Japanese terms are not explained, the author relying on readers having some familiarity with the period (which is a reasonable assumption given that most of us will have played Shogun or Shogun II).

    It isn't perfect. Even though I am no master of Japanese mores and etiquette, I suspect that the situation as described is not exactly correct historically. But no matter, it is convincing enough for the average reader to be carried through to the denouement untroubled by insistent voices in the back of the head crying foul.


    Fiction Winner: Maiko by Captain Jin

    Skantarios Review
    This is the story of a young samurai, a Maiko (re: apprentice Geisha) and their forbidden love in a time of war. The narrator is the young samurai in the service of the Takeda Clan on the brink of war with the combined forces of Ieyasu Tokugawa and Lord Nobunaga. He has fallen in love with an unnamed Maiko but that type of love is forbidden as Geishas and their apprentices live in the “Willow World” and are not allowed attachments.

    The wording of the story is quite good and it really conveys the deep emotion of the narrator for the Maiko and his conflicting thoughts as he accepts his duty over his own desires. At no point does it get bogged down in superfluous details or hackneyed dialogue (both common traps for these types of stories). It moves along quickly and comes to its believable (and tragic) ending in good time but without sacrificing important elements.

    I should say that this is probably my favorite of the three stories I reviewed. It moves well, is historically accurate, and has a nice tenor and feel. Excellent overall.

    Juvenal Review
    A story of a young Samurai leaving his forbidden love and going to war.

    This is the most authentically Japanese-feeling of all the entries I have read. It is also very well constructed. The introduction (a meeting with the narrator's first-love) is extremely well done, setting an intense emotional tone which gives the subsequent battle account more depth, enabling us to identify more strongly with the first-person narrator.

    The battle experience of that narrator is also recounted with great intensity. We are continually aware of his state of mind, of how he is influenced by his culture and rank, how he feels about his comrades, his determination to fulfil his duty. A sprinkling of authentic Japanese terms also help convince us that we are observing something genuine.

    At the end, the two halves of the story are rejoined and brought into harmony. We come to realise that all the narrator has done has been for his love, not his comrades, his master or even his own ego. The story ends with the same words with which it began... a phrase now heavy with meaning and deep sadness.

    Indeed the story is almost perfect (although I am not qualified to judge the accuracy of the Japanese terms). It is only very slightly let down only by two wrong word choices (“arquebusier” and “drown”) and a spelling mistake (“cavarly”) which should have been caught in proof-reading.

    In truth, this is a worthy winner!


    Reviews by Juvenal and Skantarios


    Scriptorium Competition Japan: Poems
    Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

    A Shogun's sword: (by Thefallenhun)
    A Shogun's sword strikes
    but one man, yet its gesture
    makes the whole world burn.



    Deepest night: (by President Kip)
    Deepest night
    Silence, shadows. Suddenly a star
    Brave firefly

    Sweetness, fresh
    Berries red, a tender kiss
    Autumn clouds smile

    Snowflakes swirl
    Perch on my head, speak quietly
    She loves another

    Raven alights
    Big eyes open, bows his head
    Hello old friend



    Geisha's Kimono: (by La♔De♔Da♔Brigadier Graham)



    Barking: (by Alpha Zeke)
    Her barking, so loud
    In her trail, always a mess
    I still miss her so




    Oh Lonely Oak: (by wowbanger)
    Oh lonely oak tree
    Many sights you must have seen
    Through the many years.

    In white winter snow
    And the summer's warming sun
    You are always there.

    Men may come and go
    But forever you remain
    Always stood alone.



    Rolling Hills: (by Mithiras)
    Rolling hills.
    Warm summer breeze.
    The land of the rising sun always sees.



    Perhaps inspired by the release of Total War’s Shogun II, an impressive array of poetic work was submitted to the Scriptorium Writing Competition. Six poems were selected for the public vote:

    What is probably most interesting about these poems is that they are not all merely haikus. The authors have intermeshed Japanese ideals with Western poetic devices, most notably free verse which is accentuated by an absence of meter or rhyme scheme, and developed their works into something that glorifies Bushido, tranquility, and tradition. For example, [i]Oh Lonely Oak[i]’s persona looks up to the elder oak as an honored friend, relaxes in his shade, and is thankful that the tree, forever lonely, offers its solace. Additionally, Oh Lonely Oak also follows repeating lines of iambic pentameter and heptameter. A Shogun's Sword and Barking follow the Japanese tradition of the Haiku. They are short, simple, yet strangely fulfilling. A Shogun's Sword follows the absolute power of the Shogun. In three lines the author impresses the life or death power that the ruler of Japan has over not only his clan, but of those who go against him. Barking is beautiful in that the epitome of loyalty is displayed in longing adoration for a fallen friend.

    Deepest night is devoted to remembrance of a long lost love, whether that love was a woman or a facet of nature is indeterminable. This poem has darker undertones than the rest, suggesting that the persona, the one technically narrating the poem, is of a brooding nature. Only the final line offers some sort of comfort. By contrast, Geisha's Kimono has a far brighter setting with a clearly feminine persona. What makes this poem so interesting is its very probability; it would not be uncommon for a village girl to fall in love with a warrior (ninja in this case), the persona is a thief; thievery means death, and though her lover is a ninja, who follows the way of shadow, it is unclear if he will carry out the sentence.

    The last entry, Rolling Hills, is almost something of a hybrid haiku. It suggests that the rising sun, the emblem of Japan, is like an unblinking eye – ignore the LOTR reference – in that the combined strength and will of the Japanese people, as one, can be as far reaching and powerful as any other state the world over.

    Remember to thank the faithful librarians of the Scriptorium for putting this wonderful competition together. Good bye, and happy reading!

    Review by Carloginias


    Review: Short Tales of Middle Earth
    A series of single Fan Fictions by Inarus
    Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 


    Let me begin by saying that I have been a massive fan of the works of J.R.R.Tolkien for many long years, ever since I first read The Lord of the Rings when I was only 11, nigh on 10 years ago. I fell in love with the world Tolkien had created; tales of great quests and epic battles fuelling my young mind. Although this passion may have faded somewhat in recent years, the works of Tolkien still hold a special place in my heart. It is because of this love for the original stories that I had largely steered clear of fan written fiction (or fanfics for short) for fear it should ruin some of the magic created by Tolkien. Thus it was with more than a little trepidation that I responded to a plea by Inarus for feedback on his large collection of Tolkien inspired tales that lie hidden away in a sub forum of the Third Age Total War mod forum.

    I need not have worried. From the very beginning I was gripped. Inarus has managed to capture an essence of the magic that first made me a fan of Tolkien those many years ago, while adding his own personal style and view to things, a remarkable achievement and one that I praise him for.

    So without further ado lets take a closer examination of some of these fine tales.

    Where better to start than with the first of Inarus' stories that I read. Entitled "The Mansion of the Dwarves", it follows the dwarves of Durin VII as they fight to reclaim the Mines of Moria from the goblin hordes. this short story both begins and ends with verses of poetry, the first by Tolkien himself, about the emptiness of Khazad-dûm, and the second by Inarus, in a matching style, once the dwarves have returned.
    The world is grey, the mountains old,
    The forge’s fire is ashen-cold;
    No harp is wrung, no hammer falls:
    The darkness dwells in Durin’s halls;
    The shadow lies upon his tomb
    In Moria, in Khazad-dûm.
    But still in sunken stars appear
    In dark and windless Mirrormere;
    There lies his crown in water deep,
    Till Durin wakes again from sleep.
    But after countless battles fought,
    with Khazad steel so finely wrought,
    after many years of darkness past,
    the children of Durin returned at last,
    to their vastest realm with countless tomb,
    to the Dwarven halls of Khazad-dûm.
    This I thought was a very good idea and, despite the author's claims of hating poetry and being pathetic at it, worked very well. The description of the battle against the goblins is well written, if a little short. In my opinion such a large and important event deserves more attention than the 10 or so lines written here, but then that's probably just me being blood thirsty and wanting to read more of the goblin slaughter and not a fault of the author.

    The next two tales that I will look at here take the reader back through the ages to one of the greatest battles of the 1st Age, the Dagor Nírnaeth Arnoediad – the Battle of Unnumbered Tears. Both these stories tell of epic duels that happened during that battle but that Tolkien only briefly told of. "Of Fingon and Gothmog" describes the fight between Fingon, the Elven High King, and the Lord of the Balrogs, Gothmog, while the second, "Of Glaurung and Azaghâl", tells of the duel between the dwarven King, Azaghâl, and the great dragon Glaurung. I have decided to review these two together despite them being separate stories because they both share a very similar style and form.

    A strong opening is always important for a short story in my opinion and both these stories provide just that, an opening sentence that hits the reader and draws them into the story.
    A wall of silver against a storm of flame, a stampede of dragons, scarlet tongues flickering across their teeth as hungrily they pursued the running flesh
    These stories show a marked improvement in writing style from the previous story I reviewed. The use of imagery is what really sets these stories apart from the crowd and is prevalent throughout a lot of Inarus' work. The clever choice of words really enable the reader to picture the action and make it feel as if you are there, watching as the duels unfold.
    He smashed to the bloody ground, pain stabbing through his flesh. A shadow hovered over him but nimbly he rolled aside and the fiery foot fell upon earth alone. Now Fingon struck, his sword stabbing deep into the Balrog’s foot, causing the creature to roar in fury
    On very rare occasions the use of imagery doesn't work as the writer intended it to. For example, saying that Glaurung "let free a jet of dazzling orange" didn't quite work for me. Even just adding the word "flame" on the end would help the reader visualise it better. Luckily these instances are very rare and don't really affect the overall flow of the story.

    I really enjoyed reading both these two stories, but if if I had to choose a favourite it would probably be "Of Glaurung and Azaghâl", though that is mainly because I much prefer dwarves to elves and not because I dislike the other story.

    Inarus has written a large catalogue of stories and I could easily carry on reviewing them for a very long time, but the deadline is pressing and I have other things to do. Therefore, for now, I will leave it at that and urge you all to go and discover them for yourself.

    Review by wowbanger


    Review: Shizan - A Duel of Two Samurai
    A story by Basileos Leandros I
    Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

    Originally a short story intended for the Scriptorium Competition (I hope everyone remembered to vote), Shizan is a work about two Japanese ronin during the civil war era of Japan and has been dedicated by the author to those who died during the earthquakes and tsunamis that devastated the Japanese islands on the 11th of March, 2011.

    The story begins with a vivid pastoral scene on the island of Honshu; they are atop a hill that overlooks a meadow, and, further to the east, the ocean. There are 15 men there. Fourteen of them are battle hardened samurai who have presumably participated in the ongoing civil war that has plagued the country for, what has been implied, years. The other is an ancient monk who offers prayers and berets the younger samurai for wavering in their devotion. They packed a light meal of rice balls. All of them ate while at the same time feeling a prevalent sense of unease. Deathlike silence permeated. They awaited their master.

    He arrived shortly. Tall and slender, he was not a very imposing man, but a brevity of calm, like an aura, emanated from his form. His robes were simple; undecorated and blue. The only thing that belied his reason for coming on that day was the long katana sword strapped to his waist and, beneath that, the smaller wakizashi short sword only to be used in dire emergencies. It is implied through his description that his eyes were kind, perhaps even enlightened, as he saw with tender pride that so many of his men had chosen to come. The only thing he asks the monk is ‘what is this place called?’, and the monk answer ‘Miharu Hill’; the master probably did not even wish to know the location since he did not believe in age, but it was perhaps the only thing he could say to uphold his honor and show his samurai his gratefulness.

    We later learn that the slender clan leader’s name was Donraku, and we know that he sat in the meadow awaiting the other clan leader, the one he was honor-bound to do battle against. Donraku knew him only by the name that had been given to him by his enemies: Nomikomu. Nomikomu was larger than Donraku, with definite muscles. After a brief discourse with his elder, they each took up their positions, Nomikumo drawing his two-handed blade, and Donraku his katana. Then their blades joined and the battle commenced. Using his lightness to his advantage, the swift clan leader Donraku avoided Nomikumo’s attacks, and they fought tooth and nail for some time. The idea of the battle occurring on an almost different plane of existence is prevalent in this work, and indeed, it seemed that each of them fought with tenacity and strength. In the end, however, Donraku’s blade slid deep within Nomikumo’s abdomen, killing him.

    On to the critique: there were a lot of nice things in this story. I enjoyed the pastoral imagery and the thematic devices employed, but there are some things that I’m worried about; though I enjoyed your descriptions, I really would have liked to have seen them enhance the feelings of unease and worry amongst Donraku’s men. Maybe the wind is howling ominously, or the waves of the ocean can crash against the sides of the island. I also realize that the idea of creating a peaceful environment may have been the author’s intent, but I think that is shown much more fundamentally through the peaceful, Buddha-like character of Donraku. The next thing I’m worried about, especially at the beginning, is the sentence structure. I think that your sentences would have been more powerful if you had used semi-colons and periods in some of the places where commas were employed. An example would be this: “They brought no horses and no squires or helpers with them; they did not need them.” Either that semi-colon or a period would have strengthened the idea that something dangerous was about to occur. Another example: “Their clan leader was not there. Nor were their enemies.” There is nothing wrong with strategically placed fragments, and I think that that is a stronger line.

    Overall, I enjoyed the story. My thanks for posting it.

    Review by Carloginias


    AAR Review Section

    Kingdom of Heaven
    An Expanded Americas AAR for M2TW by Lethe
    Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

    This title refers to the famous movie made by Ridley Scott, describing the last days of the Jerusalem Kingdom. “Kingdom of Heaven” is the expression used by Balian to imagine the Jerusalem one as it should be, as it is dreamt. So then, the Kingdom of Heaven is a new one, without any bad, sad, or tough facets from the European Kingdoms and Empires.

    The author of this story, Lethe, decided to describe his “personal” kingdom of Heaven. Here starts a brilliant and very entertaining story. Let’s tighten our belts, and follow the adventures of that new Kingdom.

    The first surprise happened when we understood that it won’t be the story of the Jerusalem Kingdom, but instead the chronicles of the Papal States, told by some squires, cardinals, knights and chroniclers.

    Lethe, the famous, is well known from his first AAR that had been enjoyed with a widespread support, talking about the Mayas. The mod used is “Expanded Americas”, and has the particularity to focus on the civilizations clashes, from both sides of the ocean. It also seems to be a hard mod.

    Lethe cleverly decided not to play VH/VH in order to avoid the fate of the unfortunate Mayas. But will that be enough?

    The Story
    Salvete! Greetings, most esteemed cardinals of the Holy See. At your request, I, Giacomo Lombardo, have made myself the humble servant of our newly elected Pope Gregory, a true and righteous man.
    You understood the main idea. You, the kind readers, are the cardinals of the Holy Council, and have the huge responsibility to show the path of faith and glory to the Pope and the men waiting for Good achievements.

    It is your story, and Lethe is only the loyal scribe who hears at you, and sends your orders to the generals.
    You would have to face the infidel Moors.
    You would discover the unknown lands over the Ocean.
    You would suffer the Jihads of the Muslim Caliphates.
    You would have to protect Rome and the Holy Council from internal Italian heretics.

    It won’t be an easy task. The Papal States are crossing troubled times, and their faithful armies are the spearhead of the Christendom all over Europe and the unknown lands.

    The world is made of turmoil, and the most unexpected is going to happen. Keep your mind clear and don’t be surprised to witness some brave attacks.


    Wait with patience the reports from your troops who went to explore the unknown world.



    You are part of the Council and Lethe will often ask for your wisdom and your enlightened choices, to lead the Christians armies to Heaven.
    My cardinals, do you have a direction you would have Pope Gregory move, or do you trust his holiness to choose the next step?
    The Heretics are pullulating.
    The infidels are rallying to have your skin.
    The evil angels are everywhere, waiting in the shadows any wrong step from the Pope.
    Definitely, it is your task to create and build slowly that new Kingdom.
    The “Kingdom of Heaven”.

    Let’s believe in it, despite the strange and fearsome men the devil could send against us, against the true faith…


    Pictures
    The pictures are a really important part of that AAR. Indeed, it is not a text heavy story. The pictures are leading and the sentences are following, describing the actions, the diplomacy events, the discoveries…

    Lethe has made an extensive use of pictures, and doesn’t fail to propose us some good ones.


    The pics are the frame of that AAR, and fortunately, they are mostly correctly chosen and fit particularly well the important battle moments.

    A good point to highlight is the absence of green arrows, or anything which could stop or hold up the imagination of the readers (oups, cardinals, I should say…). All is accurately cropped, and we have to pay homage to that time spent by Lethe. Thanks to him, we are part of the battles, part of the melees, part of the medieval ages…


    Lethe sometimes sends us some information to clarify the battle field. Using “sky shots”, the author uses some red marks to show the location and organization of the troops. I’m not a great fan of those indications, but I have to admit that there are not a lot of tools to clear the readers mind…


    Critics
    This AAR can be described and congratulated thanks to some glorious adjectives:

    · Surprising :
    Since the beginning of that story, the surprise is what leads everything. We can hardly expect what is going to happen, even if we are supposed to be the one who choose the fate of those Papal States.
    Indeed, there are some mad attacks, some unexpected twists and some perfidious betrayals…
    I think it is one of the major strength of that story, as we never know the close future.

    Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

    Did you ever think the Christians would have elephants?

    · Lively:
    The writing of Lethe is wild and innocent. It is perfect and fits very well with the story as it is made of surprise and twists. We are following with anxiety the “Unknown World” events. We fear the worst with the ill soldiers.
    We live with characters…
    Hugues de Versey died as the fleet approached the shore. His journal and body were brought back to Rome, where he was given full funeral rites, befitting a loyal member of the papal guard. His journal handed over to his holiness Pope Gregory. Gregory wept silently as he finished reading the last words of de Versey.
    · Adversity:
    The foes are hard to fight against and there are hordes rushing against the Papacy.
    It helps the reader not to be bored with an over-easy campaign. We all have a perverse part which claims adversity for our beloved writer Lethe.

    Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

    · Winks:
    Nothing was clearly revealed, but I suspect the author to play with the “real world” news. What about an invasion force coming from Tripoli to punish the infidels from Benghazi?

    Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

    The Pope himself is part of that raid, and will meet tough times there. Apparently, the Benghazi people are not the kind to be dealt with ease.

    Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 
    More rioting in Banghazi! Over 3,000 citizens dead and 100 soldiers. This is how the people reapy our kindness in staying our hand?

    Conclusion
    That is a brilliant picture driven story. I was impressed by the Maya first AAR of Lethe, and I found there the same magic mushr… errm, ingredients, that make us live the story.

    Of course, some readers who love deep stories with plots, structural writing, and literary medieval parts would surely still be thirsty after that read, but they couldn’t say that it is annoying. That refreshing Papal Chronicle is a treasure for our imagination. Everything seems possible. You just need to ask. There is no madness for Lethe, just solutions or epic defeats…

    Unfortunately, the story is currently sailing on bustling waters, and no cardinal could help for that sort of difficulty:

    One of my two hard drives appears to have crashed. Unfortunately it was the hard drive that had all of my games installed on it, including Medieval 2 and my saved games.
    Hope still remains, as a tiny candle, wrapped up with shadows…

    Heretics shadows, of course.

    Review by la coupe est pleine



    Monthly AAR Competition Section

    MAARC XXVI
    Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

    I can hardly believe it! Having waited several months for MAARC XXV, number XXVI comes along almost before the drama of the previous competition has died away.

    Rather than inflict my pedestrian and superficial prose upon you, here is an excerpt from Radzeer's Winners Announcement.
    Quote Originally Posted by Radzeer View Post
    In this month's competition, the pagans got the upper hand. Led by Juvage, the bloodthirsty and fierce exile in Pagan Vengeance, the Cumans seem unstoppable and secured the first place in Skantarios' new tale. Juvage's journey has already led the readers into the eastern darkness, a cruel world where nobody is asking for or being given mercy, and there is still a lot to come - including the Mongols! Can Juvage and his powerful protector Kovas stop the Yellow Terror? Stay tuned!

    A bit behind the pagans, the French Catholics put up a strong fight. Many of them of course don't know that their leader, the enigmatic Philippe is not a Catholic - in fact he has the pope's blood on his hand! The
    second place goes to la coupe est pleine and his chronicle: An Eastern Jewel in a Western World!!! Chronicles of a French Miserable. There are reasons for the Eastern Jewel to feel miserable, as the royal family is constantly plotting, and the English longbowmen are also out to get him.

    The Orthodox troops were hindered by the infight between the sons of the late Grand Prince, and could not produce a strong, charismatic leadership. The long search for Oleg (wait, who is Oleg?) finally ended, while adventurous members of the family continue to carve out territories for themselves. That is how
    Primus Inter Pares - The Kievan Rus (written by your humble correspondent) ended up in the third place. Go Oleg!
    For your delectation we have reviews of An Eastern Jewel in a Western World and Primus Inter Pares. We haven't caught up with Pagan Vengeance yet, maybe next time.

    Coverage plagiarised by Juvenal



    Tale of the Week Section

    Tale of the Week: March News
    Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 


    Oh...sorry, I didn't see you guys standing there, come on in. **Mega looks up from his little scribbler's desk**

    Well then, welcome back for another round of TotW coverage. Currently here's what we have on the offering plate.

    TotW 108a: "Thunder in Paradise"
    VOTE: TotW 107a: "Under Moonlit Skies"
    THE TALE PROJECT: Writer Story Gallery listing
    TotW Winners Story Archive
    Monthly AAR Competition {The MAARC}

    If you do get a chance, drop by and cast a vote, throw down your own spur-of-the-moment story, or just drop by the Tale Project/MAARC and spend some time looking through the different galleries. If you feel it, a kind word here and there and a little Rep goes a long way with the writers. They don't get out much... As of late we've had an influx of new writers and they seem to be leaving their mark. That's readily apparent after reviewing the latest round of competitions...

    TotW 103a: Lord of the Tale
    In a double overtime bout, that's right, not one but two overtime votes to decide the winner, Neige Noire just nudged past Russian Gondor to claim victory. In as much as both were worthy of victory & praise, both are therefore on display here.

    TotW 103a: The Picture: Winner



    TotW 103a: The Story: Winner

    And so he lay there, looking at the falling snow like a dead man. Not stirring or even blinking. The poor old Albert. Most of the men in the battalion had already gotten used to his bizarre ways. Some called him wicked and threw stones at him. They were punished immediately.

    The truth was that Albert was a good marksman. No, he was an excellent marksman, the best in the whole regiment. That was the only reason he was still tolerated.

    And there he was, still as a forgotten statue. With his white moustache catching even whiter snowflakes.

    The freezing air seemed to cover the inside of my lungs with a layer of ice and I was getting worried for the old fool.

    "Gerard, bring him a blanket or something," I shouted, trembling with cold, "that bald fool of a man will freeze himself to death."
    "If I had a blanket," followed a solemn retort, "I'd be warming my own ass!"

    Suddenly Albert shook his moustache wildly and sneezed his hat off. Then he stood up and rubbed his bald head.
    "It didn't come," snarled the said hatless man.
    "What didn't come?" I inquired in a reserved manner, pretending not to be interested, while inside I was boiling with anticipation.

    "Pitchforks," verbosity was not among Albert's most observable traits.
    "Sure... I didn't see any," I replied, slightly confused, "We are in the middle of nowhere. Where do you suppose they would come from?"

    "Captain Montyre said he hoped it would rain pitchforks points down on us all," Albert explained in a calm tone, rubbing his hands, "So I was looking for them to come and strike me dead."

    After a brief silence, bursts of laughter emitted all around us.
    "I knew he was mad! I knew it! But now he's gone outright nuts," shouted Gerard chokingly, twisting with laughter.

    "But why were you laying in the snow? Why couldn't you have waited for your death while standing or even sitting for that matter?" I asked, looking in the man's pale, grey eyes.
    "What do you mean, why?" he yelled, infuriated by the laughing crowd, "How do you think an old war veteran would look with a damn pitchfork in the top of his head?"

    TotW 103a: The Picture: Runner Up



    TotW 103a: The Story: Runner Up

    The Doomed Run

    The streets were solemn and silent, as all that was heard was the slight drum of a slow hoof-beat. The Steward, Lord Denethor, had sent his brave knights, along with his son Faramir, out to re-capture the ruined city of Osgiliath. A crowd stood around the knights in silence, flowers littered the cobble-stone street as many more were thrown from the level above. They all knew it would be a doomed run; there was no way for a handful of knights to re-capture a city infested with thousands of orcs. But the city had to be recaptured….

    The gates groaned as if in hidden grief as they were opened. The knights slowly came out of the city, and lined up on the fields. The wives and family of the many men cried on the battlements, knowing the doom that lay ahead of their husbands and fathers. The horses whinnied as they were spurred, the charge had begun. Hundreds of hoofs battered the grassy plain, raising a long cloud of dust.

    The orcs, who were peering at their enemy, looked through the battlements with pleasure, expecting a nice fight. But their commander had something else in mind; he ordered his thousands of orcs to draw their bows….. And fire. Thousands of blackened bowstrings were released as the orcs fired their putrid, filth encrusted arrows. The knights, who had not even made it to the city, were shot down, as horses and men tumbled.

    The gates groaned again, and were opened…. Instead of seeing a proud regiment of victors, the people saw a horse, slowly limping towards the gate, carrying a wounded man, the son of the Steward.


    TotW 104a: The Seas of Wrath
    In an overtime bout amidst stormy seas, newcommer Lord Horatius, outlasted 'Gunny in a clash of nautical goliaths....

    TotW 104a: The Picture



    TotW 104a: The Story

    “Sir, the Puissant is coming about! She’s trying to rake us!”

    Midshipman Philip Carradine was visibly agitated as he watched the French ship of the line laboriously present its figurehead to HMS Spritely, its canvas sails catching the wind and billowing out like massive bed sheets on an oversized clothesline. He looked at the Spritely’s captain, John Quinn, a much older man who seemed unfazed by the sight of the enemy three Decker closing on his ship. Quinn clasped his hands behind his back and puffed out his chest, the fingers of his right hand tracing the outline of the wedding ring he wore on his left. “Commodore Le Clerc is no doubt chastising himself for taking his flagship out of Le Havre without any escort Master Carradine,” he remarked to his young charge. “If you would Philip, perhaps you would train your glass on her figurehead?”

    “Aye Sir.” The boy replied, peering through his tarnished, second hand spyglass. “It appears to be a sphinx, sir.”
    “Indeed lad, very good.” The Captain replied, peering at the approaching ship through his own telescope. “However, with the wind a quarter astern, I very much doubt the sphinx shall have opportunity to pose us a riddle. Le Clerc has been so occupied with the Pitt; he has lined himself up very neatly with our starboard guns. Mr. Maxwell!” The Spritely’s first Lieutenant was instantly on the quarterdeck, kicking aside a sizable splinter as he approached the captain. “Gun crews ready sir.”

    “Well done Tom. How’s your head?” the captain asked, affording his first Lieutenant a brief glance before his eyes returned to the approaching Puissant. Lieutenant Maxwell plied a smudged handkerchief to his sweaty face, dabbing at the trickle of blood that had stained his powdered hair. “Stings sir, I suppose I’ll live.”

    “If the letter from your wife you so eagerly shared with us at my table last week is any indication, I’d say you’d damn well better live,” Captain Quinn replied, allowing himself a smile. “I expect you to name that son of yours after me, of course.”

    Lieutenant Maxwell flashed a weary but toothy grin. “Shall we fire sir?”
    “In a moment, Mr. Maxwell,” the captain replied. “Can you see the Frenchies on her deck, Mr. Carradine?”
    “One of the blighters has an ostrich feather in his hat, sir.” The young midshipman replied.
    “Not for long Philip. Mr. Maxwell, fire if you please.”
    Lieutenant Maxwell abruptly turned, cupped his hand to his mouth and bellowed the captain’s order across the length of the gun deck: “Starboard battery, fire as you bear!”

    The Spritely rocked back on her port side as her starboard guns unleashed a rolling broadside of solid shot at the stem of the Puissant. Looking through his glass, Midshipman Carradine could see the splinters fly from her foremast and an unseated bow chaser smash through the rail and fall over the side, into the white-capped sea, then the wind carried the smoke of the Spritely’s guns into his field of vision.

    “Is the sphinx still there Mr. Carradine?” Captain Quinn asked, his hands still clasped behind his back. “I can’t say, sir. The ostrich feather is certainly gone though.”
    To the amusement of those on the quarterdeck, the Captain released a hoarse bark of a laugh, and briefly doffed his gold trimmed hat. “Good lad. Mr. Maxwell, my compliments to the gunners.”
    “Gun crews, reload!” yelled Lieutenant Maxwell, as he knelt to pick up his hat, which had lain on the deck for most of the action, shot off his head by a French sharpshooter in the Puissant's rigging.

    “Any signal from the Pitt?" Captain Quinn asked.
    “Aye sir!” called Major Anthony Phipps, the Spritely’s commander of marines, the white facings on his red coat stained with sweat and gunpowder. “She’s just off the Puissant’s stern!”
    The captain peered through his spyglass. “By God, she’s holed! Why don’t you launch the boats, Thornton, you stubborn fool?” he growled, cursing the obstinate character of his counterpart captain.

    “Men are jumping from her rigging sir!” Major Phipps cried, looking through his own glass. “Oh Lord, she’s capsizing!” And indeed, the smaller British ship was listing badly due to the punishment it had sustained in combat with the larger Puissant.

    The captain set his jaw. “Mr. Maxwell, disengage! Bring us about and launch the boats, I want rescue parties in the water post haste!
    “But Sir!” cried Midshipman Carradine. “The Puissant!”
    To hell with her!” the captain snarled. “Let her limp back to Le Havre, blast it! I said disengage, Mr. Maxwell!”

    “Captain,” Lieutenant Maxwell gasped, gesturing to the enemy ship, his eyes wide with awe and fear. “She’s afire.”

    Captain Quinn turned just in time to see flames engulf the French man of war’s mainsails, spreading up the mast. In a moment the tarred deck would be on fire, and then the painted hull, and then the flames would find the powder magazine …

    The captain removed his hat and his powdered wig as well, revealing the few wispy strands of hair that clung to his aging scalp as he took in the spectacle of the flaming ship drifting closer and closer.

    “God Save us.”



    TotW 105a: Against All Odds
    As titled, "Against All Odds", wowbanger emerged victorious, holding off Beckitz & E.K, from a highly compeditive ten entry field.

    TotW 105a: The Picture


    TotW 105a: The Story

    "Against All Odds"

    I was the last. Against all the odds I was the only man in that square that survived. Around me lay the bodies of both crusader and infidel alike. My companions, friends and brothers, everyone I held dear now lay in a crumpled mass around me as I knelt and wept for them. Why did I have to survive to bear the burden of grief alone?

    I had joined the crusade to escape from the grief that gripped me after my wife died during child birth. Initially things went well; I joined with a company of knights heading towards Genoa where we could take ship to the holy lands. I got on well with the company commander (a Templar knight by the name of Raymond) and quickly made friends among my new companions. The voyage was good and we ran into few storms, although some of the men still suffered from terrible sea-sickness. The days and weeks of the journey were taken up with sword practices and playing dice with my new found friends, I actually won a healthy profit much to their annoyance.

    Eventually, we landed at the crusader port of Acre and I amazed at the wonders of that city. The exotic goods on offer in the markets, the beautiful women, the buildings, the magnificent cathedral, all of it astounded me. We stayed but a few days in Acre before news arrived that our company was moving on to give battle to the infidel Turks, though I could have stayed in that fair city for an eternity.

    After a few days marching through the baking heat of the desert we eventually sighted a smallish town flying an infidel banner proudly above the gates. Our commander quickly ordered us to make camp and prepare for a speedy assault at first light the next day. We set about lighting fires, preparing food and, perhaps most importantly, sharpening swords and making ladders to scale the town’s walls before settling down for some much needed rest.

    Just before dawn broke the next morning we made our final preparations before the attack, checking the ladders, fitting our armours and all the little rituals that each man has before battle. Then we started to advance. At first things went well, we attacked from a small valley and as such were able to get close to the wall before the alarm was raised in the town. This meant that we were able to easily take the walls with little resistance. It was as we moved deeper into the town that things went badly wrong for the company.

    Ambushed from the tiny side streets and alleys we were quickly surrounded and outnumbered. Although we fought well and slew many of our foes there was nothing we could do to hold against the numbers and fanaticism of the Arab soldiers. One by one my companions fell around me until, against all odds, I was the last left. I was prepared to accept my fate and die there with my friends, there was nothing left to live for anymore. However, Fate had other plans.

    Behind me I heard a horn and the thunder of hooves. Looking round I saw the crusader heavy cavalry charging down the street to smash into the Turkish soldiers. Quickly throwing myself to the ground I watched as the horses pounded overhead and crashed into the enemy. Those who didn’t die in the charge turned and fled with the horsemen in hot pursuit.

    I had survived against all the odds, but at what cost? Looking at the death and destruction around me I knelt amongst my fallen comrades and wept. I joined the Crusade to escape grief, instead I had just found more.



    TotW 106a: Lords of the Bow
    Through a hail-storm of arrows 'Gunny managed to beat off surges by wowbanger and E.K to claim victory's banner.

    TotW 106a: The Picture: NOT AVAILABLE

    Picture Not Available

    TotW 106a: The Story

    I wade forward in the combined muck of feces and mud, created by the combination of deep furrows, hard rain, and incessant dysentary that has plagued our men since Harfleur. Glittering French banners litter the sky in an unreal spectacle. We try to count them as we move forward, but there are too many, and for each banner there are over one hundred men. Thousands upon thousands of Fresh French troops, drunk on wine and arrogance, are ready to meet us, and so we are ready to give battle.

    We continue to advance to longbow range, where we once more pound our sharpened stakes into the ground, and use our poleaxes to sharpen them once more. We number 6,000; they number of five times that number. We are weary and sick; they are fresh and robust. We are screwed; they are victorious. I cannot banish these thought from my mind as I put my weight on my massive bow to bring it down so that I can put the drawstring onto it. On one side of me I place my broadhead arrows, useless against man, but deadly against horses. Our Venetaur orders us to draw, we are about to send a round of arrows into the French ranks. I bring the drawstring back to my ear, an effortless action for me, though impossible for other men. We release, sending hundreds of screaming broadheads towards the French ranks. One, perhaps two men fall, but it is enough. We spur the drunken wretches to battle, and they advance. The horses come at us, albeit very slowly as they try to wade through the muck. The riders attempt to charge as their beasts are hit by a salvo of broadheads, slicing into the bellies of the animals, bringing them down, their riders with them to be drowned in the muck. Volley after volley smacks into the horsemen, their ranks thinning, tripping over the dead. Only a few reach us, as their riders attempt to spur their horses forward a bit more. We step back, behind our stakes, as the horses impale and kill themselves, throwing their riders face first into the mud where they either drown, or are killed by an archer's polaxe which, when wielded by an Archer, can crush even the best Milanese plate. The remaining horses run rampent, smashing into the French infantry as they desperately attempt to wade through the muck towards the English Men at Arms. We begin to unleash our bodkins. Screams of pain emerge from the French line as those too foolish to close their visor are blinded. The deadly bodkins punch through the less expensive plates, and create a deadly annoyance for those in the stronger suits.

    They near the English line, and attempt to increase their speed to punch through. The English take a step back, and the French lose their footing. The English counter charge and utterly obliterate the charge, polehammers falling, swords slashing, French falling. Many Frenchmen trip over their dead as they near the line, falling to their death via drowning in the vile concotion we fight in. The French are utterly blind, the English, however, have their visors raised, and can easily parry and deflect the wild French blows. Some French men at arms break off the attack, and the battle becomes a rout, as a second wave charges in. Some of the Frenchmen come at the archers, hoping to kill some of the bastards which slay the Cream of French nobility on a regular basis. But we are unencumbered, our murderous Poleaxe blows combined with our mobility and lack of armor, serve to make Archers an even more deadly foe. The French second wave turns to panic and death, and so they retreat.

    We slay our Prisoners, for now we have so few men in the battle line, yet hundreds guarding the prisoners. The French third wave could yet be upon us, and we have no more arrows. The murder stops, however, when it becomes apparent they have had enough. The French retreat, almost like a nasty forshadowing of the future, and St. George has won. This St. Crispin's day, England has triumphed, and the Twin Saints Crispin and Crispinian have had their revenge for Soissons. We have won the day, albeit not without cost, but won it nonetheless. We have acieved victory against all odds, Cry 'God for Harry, England, and Saint George!'


    Well that pretty much brings you guys up to date, but before we say goodbye, I would like to take a moment to congratulate wowbanger on his recent triumphant journey in the scriptorium competition. His adventures are chronicled in... Wowbanger's Writing Study

    Oh yeah...One more thing before you go. The Writers' Study is currently cross training staff, so you will probably be seeing a few new faces wearing the TotW shop-keep apron. That should certainly prove for some interesting times ahead. Until next time then, this is Mega Tortas for the Critic's Quill, wishing you safe journey and good fortune....

    Shrammmful Drispray....

    Coverage by Mega Tortas


    imb39 ...is my daddy!
    See AARtistry in action: Spite of Severus and Severus the God

    Support the MAARC!
    Tale of the Week Needs You!


  2. #2
    Juvenal's Avatar love your noggin
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    Default Re: The Critic's Quill: Issue 26

    Issue 26 - Part 2
    This is the bit of the Quill where the articles live.


    Table of Contents




    Interview Section

    An Interview with Radzeer
    Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

    Editor's Note: Beer Money is currently off-line due to internet connectivity problems. Luckily his interview subject had a full transcript (except for introductory notes), so we are still able to publish!

    1. As always the first question is: How did you initially come into the TW experience? How long were you playing TW before you came across TWC.net and saw the AARs there? And of course, what got you to start your own?

    My total war experience started with the original MTW. I discovered TWC after I bought RTW and I was looking for some campaign guides. Soon I was drawn to the AAR sections, and I was lurking for quite awhile before registering as a member – which I did so that I could congratulate Skantarios. And it was a long summer when I had some free time, so I thought why not try one out myself. It made some sense since I played the game with a strong emphasis on roleplaying already.

    2. The Chronicles of a Hungarian Freeman was your first AAR and it did quite well, winning the MAARC XXIV! Was this your first stint at writing creatively or had you been doing history themed writing before?

    Writing fiction is not unfamiliar for me, although I have not written medieval themed stories before. I have a few short stories, mostly satires, in my native language (Hungarian) for my own entertainment. Also, I worked for years as a journalist, and now part of my RL job is to write non-fiction reviews and various research reports. This is of course quite different from writing an AAR as I quickly learned. The one thing I could recycle from my earlier writing experience is the importance of a narrative structure. Writing runs in the family though. One of my uncles was a fiction writer, and my daughter excels in creative writing in school.

    3. Speaking of history, most TWCers and especially AARtists have a fond appreciation of it. Both of your epic AARs are set in the middle ages. Can we expect future AARs to stay within this period or have you looked at RTW, ETW themed AARs? As a follow-up, besides SS, do you have favorite mods for any of the TW series?

    My favorite period is the middle ages, so that explains why both of my stories are situated in MTW2. My favorite medieval fiction is Albanian writer Ismail Kadare’s The Siege, and I’ve always been a history buff, especially for the history of Eastern Europe. Since my AARs are plot-driven, I think it is important for them to sound as authentic as possible, so I keep writing about an era I know well enough. Before I started the Kievan story, I read a few books about the early Rus, just to get familiar with the context. Among my plans, there is an RTW-based AAR, but that requires quite a bit of reading first and will probably be the only project outside the medieval world.

    In terms of my favorite mods, EB for RTW was the first mod I ever tried. I like it very much, just like RSII. For MTW2, I enjoyed Broken Crescent and I would really love to have a well-polished DLV. I value its immersion, but it gave me too many CTDs. I actually started my Kievan AAR on DLV, but I had to abandon it. And I am a fan of Tolkien, so occasionally I play TATW too. That mod is really cutting edge in many ways, although it is notoriously difficult to write a TATW AAR (which I don’t think I will ever try).

    4. During gameplay in your AARs were there any surprise moments where you said, "that REALLY helped my AAR!" Were there any where you said, "well that didnt go as planned - going to need to change that storyline..."

    One of the moments that helped my storyline was when I discovered a rebel army full with Croat axemen and feudal knights in Hungary, and could engineer the battle with the “Croat loyalists” which was a nice fit to the story. It was also pleasantly surprising when the AI attacked me on three fronts in my Kievan campaign! I was actually wondering what to do after the rebels were mopped up, and then came the Cumans… It was great. For the changes I had to make, nothing beats the story adjustments due to the 1TPY aging I had in the Hungarian story. I had to make quite a few changes in the storyline when my characters became old really fast. That was the first and last 1TPY campaign for me…

    5. I know you did custom battles for Freeman sometimes to fit the story and you did try to tailor your gameplay to history but were there ever moments where you said, "we're turning history on its head with this move."

    There were some unhistorical moves, and since I know Hungarian history in greater details, it probably bothered me more than it did my readers… I think that history cannot be fully recreated within the game. It’s a game after all with all the limitations, and of course the AI cannot follow history in its moves either. What I always try to do though is to play a reasonable alternative history which could have occurred, including characters behaving in a way which is realistic for somebody in the given context. I never do anything which completely goes against actual history. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy reading other AARs that are quite far from how history could have played out, but for my own work, I have a much more orthodox standard.

    6. Freeman was quite an adventure, gaining you a faithful set of readers. Did you envision it to be as grand an epic when you started or did it just manifest itself that way?

    To be honest, I did not imagine it to become such a hit. Originally, I just wanted to see if I could do it, basically challenging myself with a different writing genre. I was somewhat surprised that people liked the protagonist’s character development from an outlaw peasant to a captain (but no more) and finally a crusader. I knew that I did not want to write an epic story about an empire, rather an epic journey of an otherwise common man. I’m really glad that people liked it, as their encouragement has helped a lot.

    7. Kieven Rus promises to be even longer! Do you have a finite goal in mind? What parts of the story should readers expect to be continually developed?

    Yes, I have a finite goal, or at least I sort of know when the story will end. I am not a “let’s conquer the world!” type of player, so my story endpoints have to be set in the plot itself. I know that I cannot sustain my own interest in a campaign for more than a few months, and I always have new ideas that I want to try. On the other hand, I do not have enough time to run two AARs (besides my other TWC tasks), so new campaigns can only start when the old ones end…

    Going back to your question, I see approximately where the Kievan story will end, but I don’t know how – it depends on what the campaign will throw at me. In any case, I plan to continue describing the fight for power among the three branches of the royal family. That is something that has happened so many times in Kievan history and eventually brought the Rus down. I also have a few ideas how to develop the “story within the story” component too, the fate of the three brothers who I grew quite attached to. They are becoming old, by the way, so there will be a second generation coming up soon. The integration of these two themes is actually a core of a potential future novel from this story.

    8. On to the more technical aspects of AARing. We all know it takes time to put these together. When you present a chapter, what do find the most challenging piece? Putting together the writing? The pics? The presentation (chapters etc)?

    At this point, it is finding the time to do all these. Writing AARs is incredibly time consuming. In terms of the presentation, I got a routine by now. Writing has not been very difficult, although in some cases I spent almost a week on a chapter. Most notable of these was the battle of Trebizond in my Kievan story where the three brothers tried to escape from the city under siege. That was a difficult chapter to write, but I enjoyed it very much.

    I probably spend most of the time with editing the pictures. I am a perfectionist in that respect, as one of my hobbies is photography. Unfortunately, I’m not a visual artist, so my Photoshop skills are limited. In addition, even with the incredible textures, Stainless Steel (or MTW2 in general) is behind what the new games can offer in graphics. But I try to do the best with what I have.

    9. As a nod to your presentation, you actually used custom battles in Freeman to get you the desired effect of your storyline. That is unique to other AARtists that I have seen and a creative way to tell your story versus stay within the limitations of just playing the game. What do you think have been the greatest changes in AARs over the past few months that has improved the overall way AARs are presented and broken the mold so to speak?

    This is a great question! Let me say this first: the presentation, the visual aids and writing styles are all based on personal preferences. There is a lot of room for experimenting with different ideas, and one of the great strengths of this community is the diversity of styles and works. This means that everybody can find something that he likes, and at the same time a new talent can show up at any day with some innovative trick. A few examples I noted in the past months are the increasing use of grand epilogues, the additions of background music, and the use of character lists to orient the readers in complex plots. I always appreciated those extra miles, and that’s why I made my contribution, the ‘behind the scenes’ part after the Hungarian story, which is how the ‘Collected Wisdom’ project started too.

    I think the greatest technical achievement over the past few months was figuring out the civil war. There have been several attempts to do this within the engine limitations, and Skantarios’ work got as close as possible to what can actually be done. It still requires some modding skills, but it has been a good example of an aspect of the game that seemed impossible to do before, and yet somebody could figure it out. As for what is coming, I think there will be an increasing number of embedded battle videos in AARs, partly from the new generation of writers and AARs in Shogun 2. Unfortunately, recording campaign battles for the older games is close to being impossible. But it was said about the civil war too.

    10. Not only are you a celebrated AARtist, you are on the Content staff! And you have done a great job of collecting pieces on how to improve your AAR writing. Of these and from your own experience, what do you find is the most important aspect of improving ones AARtistry?

    I would list three things here. The first is to read other AARs and of course all the great pieces in the Collection Wisdom thread… The golden rule about successful writers first being readers, applies here too. In fact, it applies even more, because AARtistry is more than writing, it is also about visual aids, the presentation, technical challenges and so on. The second is to follow a few basic rules that seem to apply to most works. These include picture cropping (getting rid of the user interface), the moderate use of spoilers to avoid the need for clicking every ten seconds, and to have some basic structure and consistency in the narrative. Finally, it is important to keep the readers engaged. Try to update frequently, and if RL gets in the way, let the readers know. People do stick around to learn how a story ends, and they are willing to wait, but the disappearance of the writer is disappointing.

    11. With Rus a long term project, are there other AARs you have in mind down the road that your readers can look forward to? Any chance of revisiting of Andreas' world in Freeman? Especially with your knowledge of Hungarian history?

    The Rus project will probably end during the summer. My next AAR will be either an RTW RSII story if I can have enough time to contextualize it, or a late era campaign with Poland (as you can tell, I like Eastern European factions, and as Kiev I miss the pope’s meddling!). And yes, Andreas’ story will return too. I am working on the plot for a late era Hungarian campaign, and have a few ideas already, but it will probably not happen before Christmas.

    12. We'll end on a familiar note as well. Shogun 2. Yes, No, pass?

    At this point, I’ll probably pass. I do not have a computer which can run any of the new games after MTW2. My gaming time is also limited, and since I’m more of a writer than a gamer, as long as I can entertain myself (and hopefully others) with new plots in the old games, life will be fine.

    Finally, I would like to thank you for this opportunity, and also for the work you’ve done recently to bring writers closer to readers in the Critic’s Quill!

    Interview conducted by Beer Money



    Article Section

    The Early AARtistry of Total War Shogun 2
    Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

    Anything But A Shameful Display

    It did not take long after the release of Shogun 2 for the first AAR to appear on TWC. The honor goes to Ataegina from Norway who – due to the time difference – could actually start a Date AAR before fans in the US even got the game. This AAR got more than 3,000 views in the next few days when it was updated frequently, but in the third day it was suddenly discontinued. (At that time the existing AARs were moved to a temporary subforum which was not easily accessible.)

    The first Shogun 2 AAR picture…

    As probably many others, I was also reading through the first AARs to get a feeling of the game, but at the same time I was looking for a good story too. I soon realized that there is a difference between the first round of AARs of a new game and those that are written later. The first AARs focus much more on the new aspects of the game, sort of explaining what is happening in a campaign diary format. An exception to that rule was Deylon’s Uesogi AAR, a very good start of a memoir of an old soldier. The first comedy AAR was written by Mordorru (a killer user name by the way), in a form of a witty dialog between the faction leader and the beloved advisors. Unfortunately, this AAR apparently ended after one update, with the faction leader’s stylistic statement:
    Damnit!
    Comedy AARs are always very difficult and therefore risky to write, but that could be a discussion for another article. The first four AAR attempts can be found here. A few days later, a separate subforum was established for Shogun 2 AARs here.

    As I am writing this article, there are nine AARs listed, with probably more to come by the time you read these words. None of these have a hit count as high as Ataegina’s Date AAR yet, but they are a nice sample of Total War AARtistry. Therefore, instead of focusing on one (although several are good candidates for full reviews later), I briefly introduce them all.

    The first ones of many to come Luki’s Date campaign is a standard campaign diary with large and nicely detailed campaign pictures. There is very little text and no plot, but as a unique feature, Luki provided videos for the battles. I have to admit that I had some difficulties figuring out what is going on there, but that is partly because I was unfamiliar with the game (and I could see what many critics noted, namely the fast battles – fixed with a mod since then). This AAR has not been updated since March 22, so it may be dead already.

    Muha’s Oda AAR is a shadow project from another site. His faction choice is actually a very hard one, and that is obvious from the campaign, which makes his AAR very interesting. The writing is still in the typical campaign diary style, but Muha spices it up with some puns (such as “And my peasants are now pretending to be civilized! what Rubbish!” and “A battle of samurai begins, three of them actually.”). There are many pictures from both the campaign and the battle (these latter are uncropped and unedited but still quite nice), and my only remark is that they are attached as thumbnails, leading to too many clicks.

    Johnhughthom’s Shimazu story is closer to how most AARs are written. There is a more detailed narrative to tell the rise of the Shimazu from a “lonely corner of Japan”. The AAR has well selected campaign pictures to illustrate the story, and the battle descriptions are in spoilers. Unfortunately the story apparently stopped after two updates, despite it had some excellent pictures, showing the skills of the author.

    Heartfire’s Oda campaign is different from the previously mentioned ones because it has an actual plot with dialogs. At the moment it has only two updates so far with no pictures other than the opening game shot. He is working on it though, so we can expect more developments in the story – I’m looking forward to reading about it, especially is that the Oda is one of the hardest factions.

    Aodh Mor’s Uesugi AAR is definitely text heavy, but starts with a very good battle description. At the second update though the narrative turns over to first person, but not entirely explained why, making the connection between the two updates somewhat unclear. The author clearly has good writing skills, so my suggestion would be to add more pictures and a more focused storyline.

    Vandal Warlord has a very different story to tell. His narrative follows the adventures of a Portuguese sailor in Japan, partly using his journal and partly employing a third person narrative. It did not get beyond the first update yet, but looks like an intriguing story (with a clear James Clavell undertone…). The pictures of the sea battle to set up the protagonist in Japan are borrowed from ETW, which shows a nice initiative from the author. Hopefully, we’ll soon learn more.

    Aonghus G. Friedhold’s Hojo AAR is a first person account of the second son of the Daimyo. The writing is very good and there are hints of the plot (“Thus, my brother became the heir to the most powerful clan in the region, and I remained heir to... a castle, maybe.”). This AAR has a nice balance of text and pictures (although the campaign pictures well outnumber the battle pictures), my only critique is that all pictures are in separate spoilers, which again leads to too frequent clicking, disrupting the immersion in the narrative. The good news is that the updates are regular, the protagonist has just come of age, so everything is set for a good story.

    Veteran AARtist, Lysimachos’ Mori campaign is clearly driven by an interesting plot, the first person account of the oldest son of the Daimyo, who is currently in exile for something he has done (which I’m not going to reveal here). This is another example of a carefully developed plot within the context of the game. The story is still at the beginning with six chapters so far of which the first five had really nice one word titles that I liked a lot (haiku, anybody?). Lysimachos has established himself as a writer with an EB AAR (The Legacy of Megas Alexandros), and this work shows that his talent is not confined to one particular era.

    Finally, conveniently starting shortly before the editorial deadline is LuckyLewis’ AAR, a story of the Kuninaka uprising. Not much is known at this point beyond the first battle, which nonetheless was described by high quality storytelling, not to mention the fantastic pictures. Of course, nobody expects less from the author of the acclaimed NTW AAR Liberation. I was a bit surprised though that LuckyLewis did not use his signature size (movie screen like) pictures. In any case, I am eager to learn where the rebellion leads, especially after reading that “Demoralised and distraught, they headed for the mainland for a new beginning.” Hm, demoralized already? It must be a great story!

    A few more pictures from Shogun 2 AARs
    Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 








    At the end of this overview, there are two points I would like to make. The first is that there seems to be a life course of AARs. Early AARs are different from late AARs in several respects. Early stories use campaign diary style narratives more frequently as opposed to developing complex plots. Early AARs also use more (and less edited) pictures to show the new elements. This is especially true for campaign pictures (diplomacy, new buildings etc) that tend to be used less once everybody knows for example how a new road development notice looks like. Writers in early AARs also experiment more with an era-specific writing style. This has been quite evident in Shogun 2, which has a distinct vocabulary, less familiar to many Western writers/readers. In some cases, however, this can lead to a Japan-overload where there are so many unfamiliar Japanese names (of persons, clans, titles, geography etc.), that following the story without a dictionary can be somewhat difficult.

    The second point is that about three weeks after the release of Shogun 2, thirteen AARs were started, and several of them are well underway with long term promise already. There are no two AARs that turn out to be the same. There is an incredible diversity of writing styles, visual aids, plot-types, thus everybody can find a story he likes. AARtistry is anything but a shameful display around TWC, and the new Shogun 2 AARs are clear examples of this. I encourage everybody to put down the katana, pour some cha or sake, relax by reading and give a little bow to the writers who provide free entertainment for all of us.

    By Radzeer


    Regaining the Drive to Write
    Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

    Before I begin, I’d like to introduce you to a certain scene in Black Hawk Down. A battalion of Army Rangers were sent on a mission to extract a group of important Somali officials deep within a hostile district in the capital city of Mogadishu. The Rangers used surprise and speed to their advantage, catching the Somali militias off guard and using the momentum of their attack to make a quick extraction. Then, just as the mission starts coming to a close, a Black Hawk helicopter is shot down, and the Rangers are now tasked with a rescue mission to save those aboard the fallen helicopter. By this point, the militias are aware of the attack, and are ready to provide heavy resistance. General Garrison, the commander in charge of the mission grimaces. He sighs in resignation and makes a clear statement.

    “We’ve lost the initiative.”

    Initiative is what drives AARtists to start writing in the first place. It’s what motivates and drives them to provide a solid start to what they hope is going to be a great story. But what happens when that initiative is lost and you find yourself bogged down by a lack of will and time? Like a train derailed, it falls to you to find out how to get back on the tracks.

    Losing the initiative happens to the best of us. Whether it’s writer’s block or just a stressful workload that keeps you busy for a few weeks, it is inevitable that your AAR will hit some sort of speed bump along the way that halts its progress. Losing the initiative can lead to a lack of motivation to continue the AAR, and this is how many stories meet their untimely end. So then, how can you will yourself to continue on with this AAR you were once really pumped up about? How do you regain the motivation you once had to write? How do you get back on the tracks? Below are a few tips that you may find useful in keeping your AARs alive.

    1. Re-read your AAR: Sometimes it is easy for us to lose track of what we originally set out to do by writing our AARs. In such times, re-reading your AAR has many benefits to helping you get back on track. Reading through your own work helps jog your memory of what you’ve written so far, and provides you with an urge to finish or continue what you started with. Re-reading is also helpful in that it provides you another opportunity to look over any spelling or grammar mistakes you may have made the first time around, in essence giving your AAR an extra coat of polish and shine.

    2. Think of your Readers: Every established AAR has some sort of following, no matter how big or small. Readers are very important in that they provide you with the support and feedback that AARtists use to continuously use to improve upon their own work. If you have many readers, keep them in mind. In the end, it’s your AAR and only you can motivate yourself to write – but knowing that you have a good following of readers who enjoy your work really helps you to get that motivation going.

    3. Change the Pace: Sometimes a change of pace is the best thing you can do to reinvigorate your will to write. If you have writer’s block, try working on a different side story as a way to get you back in the mood to write again. Beer Money did just that not too long ago when he wrote A Man Possessed: A Fallout AAR. He himself admitted how that story helped him get back on track in writing his Hungary AAR, which he’s been working on for well over a year now. Sometimes a change of pace in updates is all that’s needed. Perhaps you’re no longer able to update bi-weekly as you used to do so before. That’s ok, your readers will understand if real-life obligations keep you from updating so often. AARs are meant to be flexible, so there tends to be no problem if bi-weekly updates turn into weekly or monthly updates.

    4. Take a Break: Again, life has a way of burning even the best of us out. That’s perfectly fine. Sometimes, the best course of action is to simply take a break from writing altogether and focus on other pursuits. You may find that by doing so, you start regaining the urge to write you once had. Breaks, just like changes of pace, are normal within an AAR and do not necessarily spell death for your AAR.

    5. Self-Motivation: So what do you do if you don’t have many followers, or you just can’t seem to get back into your story, even after having re-read it? What if changing the pace or taking a break just doesn’t seem to work? At that point, you have to consider just how much you want to continue your AAR or not. This is where your own self motivation comes into play. After all, it is YOUR story – it is up to you to determine whether a story is worth finishing or not. I myself had that issue early in my writing career with my second AAR, Heaven’s Descent. I was ultimately unable to continue with the story due to having lost the game files, but I perpetually suffered from a lack of will throughout that story’s short lifespan. There may be times where you feel that it’s better to cut your losses and start anew. That too is alright. A story can’t be forced out all the time, lest you want the quality to suffer. In the end, you are the author of your own story, and you are the one in charge of evaluating whether or not a story has both the promise and determination of its author needed to keep it going strong.

    The above were just a few tips commonly used to keep an AAR going strong, even when initiative, drive and motivation are at an all time low. They are by no means the only ones, but they are definitely some of the most commonly used methods, and are definitely worth keeping in mind. The great thing about these pointers is that they are all interrelated. Tip 4 has an effect on your readers, which in turn affects how you go about Tip 2. In essence, all these pointers are all part of a greater state of mind that all writers go through when they think about how to go about continuing their story.

    Remember that in the end, it is ultimately you who determines the future of your story. As the author, you’re the one who gets to decide whether or not continuing an AAR is worth it or even possible, given the circumstances you’re put into. I hope that by identifying these factors, this article can provide some sort of guidelines for AARtists who may have lost their way and are unsure of the fate of their story. Thank you for reading, and I wish all of you the best with your AARs!

    By Thokran


    Theme and Motif in a Story
    Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

    1. General outline
    Last month I spoke of how I experienced the process of AAR writing as a first timer. I received a good deal of positive feedback and I wanted to write another article for the Quill. This time I will discuss theme and motif in stories. I will define these concepts, offer tips on how to recognize them in a story and on how to implement some of your own in your story Fearing my technical explanation will not be clear, I will use many quotes and specific examples to ensure that you have an idea of what I am talking about.

    Who might be interested in this article?
    Anybody interested in the inner workings of stories and these particular technical aspects of writing. Themes and motifs offer a very real literary value to your writing as well as an element of recognition if it is done correctly and it will enrich your story without much effort.

    What sources will I use?
    Mainly my university textbook English Literature I (Prose) by prof. Kate McDonald, my own notes from literature classes, several websites, wikipedia, a dictionary and as a specific illustration I will use the short story Cathedral by Raymond Carver because it is a textbook example of theme and motif.

    2. What is a motif?
    According to the Oxford Dictionary: "a dominant or recurring idea in an artistic work"
    According to the Free Dictionary: "a distinctive idea, esp a theme elaborated on in a piece of music, literature, etc."
    According to Merrian-Webster Dictionary: "a usually recurring salient thematic element (as in the arts); especially : a dominant idea or central theme"
    According to my textbook: "a meaningful element which is repeated in the narrative"

    In short a motif can be anything ranging from fruit and machine-guns to a beard and diapers. There is no limit on what can be used as a motif in a story as long as the element is repeated frequently and I use the vague term "frequently" on purpose. There is no real limit on how many times you can have a motif pop up in a text but since it has to be a repetition the writer must use it at least twice. If you want your motif to remain on the background use it no more than five times (arbitrary call but it is what I use) while using a motif more than ten times will make it easy to spot for the reader.

    So we now know what a motif is but let's focus a bit more on the different kinds of motif. Basically you have two groups:

    • Static motifs: these will not change the story in any way, they are only meant as a nice addition. Some motifs are almost always static, e.g. a beard. The chance of a beard interceding in the storyline is very low for obvious reasons.
    • Dynamic motifs: these will change a story or have an impact on characters.


    Dynamic motifs can influence both the story and the characters (not the same thing!). For example in a story the motif "dead children" can cause a soldier in a war to break down because he sees dead children everywhere (and the reader reads/sees them as well). A character who suffers from a mental disorder can feel haunted by a "grim reaper" phantom who follows him around. This may not affect the story in a direct way (depressive characters or something like that) but it can create a tension and in doing so it affects the story.

    When I have explained what a theme is I will move on to specific examples of motifs and themes and whether they are static or dynamic.

    3. What is a theme?
    According to Oxford Dictionary: "An idea that recurs in or pervades a work of art or literature"
    According to the free dictionary: "An implicit or recurrent idea"
    According to dictionary.reference.com: "A unifying or dominant idea"
    According to my textbook: "A central idea underlying the narrative"

    Clearly something different from a motif. Note the use of the word "idea" in the definitions! This is the main difference between a theme and a motif. You can usually (but certainly not always!) physically grasp a motif (a beard, a child and even the grim reaper could be grasped) whereas a theme is intended to be used more philosophically and it is often easier to determine in a story.

    The theme(s) of a story form the very core or base of that story and everything is built on that core. A theme influences everything in a narrative from the setting (e.g. spooky castles or immense grassy plains) to the characters (e.g. heroes, villains, princesses) and even the narrator (e.g. optimistic narrator in a fairytale or a pessimistic narrator in an apocalypse based story)

    Themes are more easily discernible than motifs in that is often apparent from the genre what theme you are dealing with. Not many fairy tales have an apocalyptic setting, if you catch my drift. I hope you have an understanding of what a theme is, what a motif is and how both are related with each other as well as different from one another.

    4. Raymond Carver and 'Cathedral'
    Biography of Raymond Carver
    Cathedral, the short story for a quick read to know what the story is about

    Carver wrote in a very minimalistic way, however I will not go into that here. Just have a quick look HERE to know what it is.

    5. Specific examples from Cathedral
    5.1 Examples of themes in Cathedral:
    Communication is a major theme in this short story. It forms the foundation for the friendship between the protagonist's wife and the blind man but I will let the examples speak for themselves:
    But she and the blind man had kept in touch. They made tapes and mailed them back and forth.
    She worked with this blind man all summer. She read stuff to him...
    The blind man made a tape. He sent her the tape. She made a tape.
    Was his wife a Negro? "Are you crazy?", my wife said.
    Then I asked if he wanted to smoke some dope with me. I said I'd just rolled a number. I hadn't, but I planned to do so in about two shakes.
    The blind man -why should he have a name?-...
    As you may be able to tell from these examples there are two parts of the communication theme. One of them is the obvious inability of the blind man to read or write and the other is the inability of the protagonist to communicate in a civilized way. He often speaks very derogatory of his wife and he is very rude at times towards his wife as well as towards his guest in the house, the blind man.

    The other major theme is blindness. We have the obviously literal and physical blindness of the blind man in the story as well as the metaphorical blindness of the protagonist. Robert may be blind but he sees the world more clearly than the protagonist who has perfect sight. Only at the end of the story (sorry for the spoiler) does the protagonist realize that he was the blind one all along. Some examples:
    He let his fingers touch his suitcase...He was taking his bearings...
    I remembered having read somewhere that the blind didn't smoke because, as speculation had it, they couldn't see the smoke the exhaled.
    I watched with admiration as he used his knife and fork on the meat.
    I tried to explain to the blind man what was happening.
    She'd turned so that the robe had slipped away from her legs, exposing a juicy thigh. I reached to draw her robe back over her, and it was then that I glanced at the blind man. What the hell! I flipped the robe open again.
    It was like nothing else in my life up to now.
    These many examples (hardly all of the ones you are able to find in the story) show that the theme is very much present in the short story and that it influences the characters (protagonist does not like blind people) as well as events (the blind man cannot sea the juicy thigh so the husband doesn't care and opens the robe).

    5.2 Examples of motifs in Cathedral:
    The beard of the blind man is motif that returns a lot. You have to focus when reading the story and you will see that it is mentioned quite often even though there is nothing special about the beard. Some examples:
    This blind man, feature this, he was wearing a full beard. A beard on a blind man! Too much, I say.
    ...I have winter in my beard now...
    He also had this full beard.
    He lifted his beard, sniffed it, and then let it fall.
    He lifted his beard and he let it fall.
    Now and then he put his fingers into his beard and tugged...
    As he listened to me, he was running his fingers through his beard.
    A whole lot of beard references from the start of the story right up to the end even though the beard plays no part whatsoever in the story. This is a textbook example of a motif.

    Alcohol, drugs and food are also a major motif in the short story and for obvious reasons dynamic motifs because they change the way the characters behave.

    In my country we have a famous writer (Pieter Aspe) who writes detective novels and he uses massive amounts of references to local dishes and drinks. Although they serve no actual purpose and he never uses them in the plot, they are used as motifs so that the reader has a feeling of recognition when reading the novel.

    Here are some examples of the motifs in Cathedral...
    Let me get you a drink...I'm a Scotch man myself.
    ...cube steak, scalloped potatoes, green beans. I buttered him up two slices of bread.
    ...he'd tear off a hunk of buttered bread and eat that.
    We finished everything, including half a strawberry pie.
    "There's more strawberry pie", I said.
    "You say when you want some strawberry pie", I said.
    The protagonist seems very keen to stuff that strawberry pie in his guest's mouth. Not really, it's just a motif. Repeating things is the oldest trick in the book when it comes to storytelling.

    There are many more motifs and themes of course but I think that these will suffice. I hope these examples have clarified things a little.

    6. How to recognize them?
    Ask yourself these questions and they will help you recognize motifs and themes:

    • Why does the author/character keep focusing on that object?
    • How does this affect the character?
    • How do the characters interact?


    I'm afraid that much of it is up to a natural feel for language. You can re-read a story many times before finally seeing a motif pop up. Bear in mind though that motifs and themes are almost non-existent in technical books and manuals and the likes.

    7. How to implement them?
    Choose whatever you want as a motif or theme and then think about how you can implement it in your own writing. My advice to you is: "Keep it on the down low but still perform a great show!" You don't want your motifs to be too obvious, but on the other hand if you are so subtle that nobody even noticed your use of a motif then you've wasted time and effort. You want the reader to think "Hey that's strange...He's talking about the beard every time something important happens!" rather than "Again with the beard?"

    Although it can be very difficult to pull off a good motif, practice will allow you to enrich your stories in no time.

    8. Conclusion
    I very much hope to have inspired you writers to try your hand at implementing a theme or motif in your own writings. It would be great if I have helped you in some way to recognize themes and motifs in the books you will read in the future. I hope you found this an interesting read and with that I conclude my second humble contribution to the Critic's Quill.

    THE END

    By Boustrophedon


    On Becoming an AARtist
    Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

    What can I say about AARs in general? I guess I could start from the beginning and go from there.

    When I first got Medieval 2, I loved it. It truly showed the potential of a great game and every time I played, I always had a hard time to stop. But back then, I didn't know the magic that would unfold once I discovered TWC.

    I came to TWC to look for answers to some of my questions about the game. I discovered TWC had a vast wealth of such information, the more I looked, the more I discovered, and by looking further, I finally discovered AARs. It was on the general forum that someone suggested me to go here, I had this story I had went through with my England campaign that I just had to write it. It was a very crude AAR compared to all the marvels that fell upon my eyes, and this was only in the Medieval 2 AAR's, there was a lot more out there as I discovered.

    I started reading posted AARs and discovered how entertaining they truly were, it added something to an already great game, it added a purpose. This is where I began my first true AAR. L'Etat c'est moi, the Monarchy of France. At first, I didn't think much of it, I told myself I would try and see how it went. I didn't expect to rival the masterpieces that were in place and I never intended to. I had an idea and a solid storyline, so I thought why not give it a try. To my surprise, my AAR attracted some readers and some are still there from the beginning.

    So, why do I continue writing? First and foremost, for myself. I have given myself a goal and I want to see it through, though where this will goal lead me remains to be seen. So I love writing this story, I love the game I am writing about and I have a great imagination to add to it all. But is that all? Of course not. I also do it for my readers. As long as they enjoy my work, as long as they enjoy reading it, then that is all that matters in the end. This story is not only for myself, but for my readers as well, or there wouldn't be any reason to post AARs in the first place.

    I also support new AARtists to the best of my ability, as I was once encouraged myself. Fellow AARtists have helped me grow and become better, and it was my hope to accomplish the same: to give good tips; to give constructive criticism; but over all to encourage AARtists to enhance our shared experience.

    Some Tips from Karnage:
    Well, I'll keep this short and sweet. First and foremost take a faction you will love, don't go for something you haven't seen posted yet, go with what you love, it will help you grow around your AAR and help you get involved a bit more.

    Keeping your promise to your readers is also important, they are waiting for your AAR and want to know when to expect new updates.

    Keeping in touch with your readers is also important, if someone posts a comment, whether positive or negative, you really ought to reply, it shows that you do care about people posting and will get back to them.

    Support fellow AARtists. Now this is key to it all, especially when you get yourself involved into writing AARs. A lot of AARtists wont show it, but creating an enjoyable AAR requires time and effort, to see new AARtists at work is great, but to give them your support only helps them more. Support them in their efforts to become even better.

    Lastly, and most importantly, enjoy yourself! An AAR shouldn't become a burden, if it ever does, then perhaps it is time to step back. AARs should be fun to do. Playing the game is never the issue, it is the writing and editing that can feel like a burden. What I do, I put some music on and just go with the flow. I take my time and take breaks when needed. Make it as enjoyable as you can for yourself and it will show in your writing.

    Remember, writing an AAR should never be about becoming the best, but just to enjoy yourself.

    I want to also personally thank Radzeer to give me this opportunity, I believe it is a great idea to express ourselves as AARtists in hope that future writers will be inspired and continue to give us exciting new stories.

    By Karnage


    Historical Sources for AARs
    Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

    Finding recently that I had twice given http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/nova/vikings/runes.html as a suggestion to AAR writers to use, I thought it might be worthwhile to provide a more comprehensive list of historical sources for general use by writers of AARs and other historical fiction. I've added a brief note of explanation to go with each source so you can decide whether it is likely to be suited to your purpose. I hope you enjoy the links.

    http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?t=34861
    This thread on TWC has links to various history websites that cover many periods of history, even ones not in the total war games. It may be long, but there's a lot of good information there.

    http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/nova/vikings/runes.html
    This site has information on the viking runes as well as other information about the vikings.

    http://www.fordham.edu/halsall/mod/modsbook.html
    This site has sections with primary sources from ancient, medieval, and modern history. I've used this in at least two of my history classes.

    http://www.thearma.org/
    This site has information on arms during the medieval and renaissance periods.

    http://www.livius.org/
    This site has many articles on ancient history, as well as links to other website covering more specific parts of ancient history.

    http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?t=287029
    This thread on TWC has links to various chinese classics, including literature, philosophical works, histories, etc.

    http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?t=60251
    This thread on TWC has links to books on history recommended by the history buffs in the vv.

    http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?t=130947
    This thread on TWC has links to documentaries and history related videos.

    http://www.flowofhistory.com/units
    This site has flow charts of history

    http://libro.uca.edu/title.htm
    This site has information on iberian history.

    By dezikeizer



    From the Editor's Desk


    I do hope you have enjoyed this issue. Although my name may be on the post, the content is almost entirely down to my team of talented and hard-working writers. Please give a big hand to Skantarios, Radzeer, Carloginias, la coupe est pleine, Mega Tortas, Beer Money, Thokran, dezikeizer, Boustrophedon, wowbanger and Karnage. If you liked their work, then send some rep their way.

    The BAARC is Coming!
    Yes, there is a new competition coming to TWC. For those of you who don't want to commit a significant proportion of your lives to writing an AAR, a much coveted MAARC medal could still be yours! Just write up a single battle as a self-contained story and submit it to the BAARC. Further details of this upcoming feast of fun may be found here.


    MAARC Gold Medal... You know you want it!

    Well, it's goodbye for this month. Please post on the thread below to tell us what you think of the issue. If you feel like writing for the Quill yourself, then just send me a PM. It really is as easy as that.

    Juvenal



    Do you know all the TWC Publications? You might be surprised at just how many there are, enough to cater for every taste. Give some of them a try by clicking through the pictures below!

    Last edited by Juvenal; April 21, 2011 at 11:40 AM.
    imb39 ...is my daddy!
    See AARtistry in action: Spite of Severus and Severus the God

    Support the MAARC!
    Tale of the Week Needs You!


  3. #3
    Boustrophedon's Avatar Grote Smurf
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    Default Re: The Critic's Quill: Issue 26

    What an epic issue this has turned out to be. So much news from the Shogun front which I found very refreshing and I think this may the first time that articles outnumber the AAR reviews in the Quill. I especially loved the reviews of the LOTR and Japan literary works. Kudos to all of the team who made this excellent edition possible and rep will be forthcoming Furthermore I hope my article has contributed in a meaningful way.

    Again great work, guys

  4. #4
    wowbanger's Avatar Decanus
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    Default Re: The Critic's Quill: Issue 26

    May I thank all the writers of the Quill for another brilliant issue, you have all done a brilliant job. Reading through this month's issue enabled me to forget about the tragedy that has unfolded in my life this week, if only for a little while.

    Particular thanks must go to Carloginias, for his praise filled review of my Gold medal winning Haiku, Mega Tortas, for advertising my Writing Study, and most of all to Juvenal, for compiling the whole thing and allowing me to join his merry band of writers.

    So once again thank you all for a great issue.



    "Some writers never know what's to be written until they see it on the page...." Some words of wisdom from my good friend, Mega Tortas de Bodemloze

  5. #5
    Inarus's Avatar In Laziness We Trust
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    Default Re: The Critic's Quill: Issue 26

    Wow! I had no idea what I was letting myself into, when I asked for a critique I did not expect to find it here! Thanks! I think the first piece was so short due to my desire to write a longer version (Borin, Dwarf of Erebor) that cropped up as I was writing.




  6. #6

    Default Re: The Critic's Quill: Issue 26

    What an epic issue this has turned out to be.
    My thoughts exactly.

    Kudos to Juvenal for putting it together, and congrats to all writers to bring such great pieces to the table! It's really great to see so many quality writings.
    (And a personal thanks to Beer Money for his great questions!)

  7. #7
    Over the hills...
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    Default Re: The Critic's Quill: Issue 26

    @Radzeer your article on Shogun 2 AARtistry was brilliant +rep

  8. #8

    Default Re: The Critic's Quill: Issue 26

    Gentleman I humbly thank you for your thorough review of my writing piece. I can't tell you how much it helps a writer than to have someone take the time to look at the work and offer critical insight. Once again, thank you very, very much.

    For the rest of the quill, some very interesting pieces. I agree wholly with the one regarding the AARistry (even if I wish the HF section got as much traffic as the AAR one did). Fine work by all.

  9. #9

    Default Re: The Critic's Quill: Issue 26

    Wow, very nice issue, and thanks for reviewing my little story

    Keep up the good work, guys

  10. #10

    Default Re: The Critic's Quill: Issue 26

    Very well done, as usual! I appreciate the reviews, thank you, and all of the contenders were just as worthy!
    Destroyer83, taking over the world since 1700.
    Don't worry, it's just business.

  11. #11

    Default Re: The Critic's Quill: Issue 26

    Great job indeed.
    The Quill increases its power each time and the qualtity, and diversity of the article is better and better.

    I particularly liked Radzeer article showing the early process of AAR in Shogun 2. Very interesting and original.
    It was also a nice idea to point at some technical litterature points, with Boustrophedon article. I never seen that before.

    Well, bravo à tous. and let's hope we can do as good and even better the next time.

  12. #12

    Default Re: The Critic's Quill: Issue 26

    Thanks for your review of my work guys. I really tried to condense it and lend it an air of simplicity.

  13. #13
    Boustrophedon's Avatar Grote Smurf
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    Default Re: The Critic's Quill: Issue 26

    Quote Originally Posted by la coupe est pleine View Post
    It was also a nice idea to point at some technical litterature points, with Boustrophedon article. I never seen that before.
    Thanks coup I'm writing a new article for the next Quill about different kinds of narrators (there are 4 large categories) so I hope that you will enjoy that one as well.

    +rep btw for your own very good work on this Quill I've been repping people here but I'm all out for today...

  14. #14

    Default Re: The Critic's Quill: Issue 26

    Thanks for the Review, and as well I enjoyed reading everyone's writings!

  15. #15
    dezikeizer's Avatar Campidoctor
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    Default Re: The Critic's Quill: Issue 26

    Great issue as always, and very good articles. I found Boustrophedon's article particularly good.

  16. #16
    Solid Snake's Avatar Vicarius
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    Default Re: The Critic's Quill: Issue 26

    Oh very well done indeed everyone. Heh, dezi, I remember your guidance when I asked you about runes....
    Do check my AAR "The Proud Blood of Germania"
    Formerly known as JerichoOnlyFan.
    And my other AAR: "The Black Serpent"




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