The Critic's Quill: Issue 21

**Juvenal** · October 19, 2010, 10:36 AM

The Editor Speaks
Would you believe it! We are Twenty One! Yes, the Mighty Quill has reached its majority with twenty one issues under its belt. From now on you will find us either propping up a Texas bar, or should you arrive slightly later, examining the sawdust on the bar-room floor.

Despite the long pause, please be assured that the Critic's Quill still soldiers on. There are some really impressive reviews in this issue... and also some that I've written

What we don't have are articles, it's all reviews this time, but at least we do have eight of them. And as a compensation we also have a departure from the Quill's usual fare in the form the ALL-NEW Historical Fiction review section! Created by Ariovistus Maximus, our new claiment for the role of resident historical expert, it will cover the goings-on in the burgeoning Historical Fiction sub-forum - where the constraints of the Total War series are comprehensively shrugged off and imagination has a free rein.

Take a look at the list of links below and see if you can't find something to your taste...

Juvenal (Editor)

Table of Contents

AAR Review Section

The Ishtar Gate to Alexandria
A Roma Surrectum AAR by ReD_OcToBeR

Spoiler Alert, click show to read:

It seems like only yesterday I was writing my first review of ‘Ishtar Gate’. Since that time I, Red October (I refuse to use your perversely frustrating opposing capitals!), the AAR, and maybe even my own reviewing style - have come a long way. Indeed the AAR has grown almost beyond recognition since May 2009!

When I last reviewed Ishtar I saw an AAR which was well-liked but only just starting to become widely recognised across the AAR spectrum by more and more people. Red had settled on a format which he seemed comfortable with and which continued to endure to the end - though not without a few tweaks and modifications. Of course, it helped that Red had won first place in the MAARC for the month before. I believe that around this period - April/May ‘09 - this swell of readers, feedback and his own increasing confidence really began to make this AAR steam ahead.

Of course, when examining an AAR, you try to provide criticism on any weak points. I interviewed Red just after the old review was done, and along with the readers, on both occasions both he and I arrived at the same conclusions. He mainly noted that he didn’t really go into depth on his characters that much and that his grammar maybe could use a touch up. The latter was still a little rusty in places throughout the AAR, but it didn’t remove any quality from the story, and was almost a little trademark gimmick of his writing that readers would see and smile at: but he tried! Maybe I should have noted that a few pictures were a little lacking in lustre, but that’s too easy to say in hindsight. It was only later that the same phalanx shots could have got a little repetitive, and Red stopped this dead by keeping the consistent quality and yet adding in a little mixing - occasional new effects, camera angles, points of view in the battlefield. It kept it all fresh.

This is the sort of shot we were used to seeing. Deftly laid out and taken, but very repetitive after the hundredth Seleucid/Ptolemaic battle!

Soon we started to see more of this sort of thing, the same style but evolved…

Or just completely different visual impetus, often to illustrate particularly tragic moments like this one, especially when coupled with poignant captions like this one is (more on that next):

The ruins of war were scattered everywhere. Great stones that once shone in the sun high above Greek men were now smashed into the grass casting blackened shadows. Argeos would press on.

The characterisation however, was a much deeper well of knowledge that needed to be sunk. I am pleased to be able to say that all the renown and gold, silver or bronze MAARCs won or tied since owe much to this and to the fact that Red has persisted.

He has followed his own advice. At the interview, he said he was working in greater depth with a new character, ‘Argeos’. I certainly saw this effort bear fruit in Red’s writings - maybe not with Argeos himself so much, but certainly we see many finer examples of this: in the mad, blood-crazed ‘Kassandros the Killer’ and in the details of the ‘Bolon’ succession of Seleucid military rulers. For this, he has to be commended.

Such is the gory-minded attitude of the later commanders in the story that as Argeos captures Bostra from the Ptolemaics, we see one of these more eloquent outbursts that became ever more frequent as the tale went on:

The numbers of those loyal to the Empire showed and slowly engulfed the rebels, smashing them into the sand and mortar. The new road into the city would be paved with their skulls. The crows would feed excessively on this day. Their leader ran off like a true coward. They let him run, so that he could tell those vile Armenians that Seleucia was once again victorious to all threats within or outside its grasp.

The one criticism that remains to be proved unfounded is one which some believe will not have changed, especially since I reviewed the AAR before: that it is too picture heavy and not descriptive enough for some tastes. They think that it does not do a good enough job to please a range of styles rather than reading like a movie…

****

Said one great ancient writer to another, “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. One man‘s bane is another man‘s fruit of the forest.” Hearing this, one young Julius ReD_OcToBeRus did after smiting the man a most terrible blow across the face proceed to tear the first writer’s AAR in two!

And the Critic’s Quill's professor SonOfAlexander did looketh on and approve.

*****

He has proved that whereas pictures may once have been his safe refuge from his lack of confidence with AAR descriptive writing, his AAR has developed and evolved into something everyone should be able to enjoy. I hope he will take this into his subsequent AAR of the same addictive style, ‘The Lone Eagle of Britannia’, on a new mod - Imperium Barbarorum. But alas, that must wait for another time, another review. Until then, we say farewell to this 1027 post, 32,528 views, 512 day Seleucid saga and I encourage you all to salute both the tale and its writer.

Yeah, I guess you’ve done alright on this ReD_OcToBeR.

Oh, and Red?

Try not to muck up ‘The Lone Eagle’ too much

.

Review by SonOfAlexander

Empire of Jaguar and Jade
An Expanded Americas TW AAR by Lethe

Spoiler Alert, click show to read:

Sometimes, when cruising the AAR forums, a title just jumps out at me for no reason I can explain. Such was the case with this AAR. Perhaps it was because it looked like a Kingdoms Americas campaign. I still have fond memories of my own efforts with the Spanish, the Apacheans and the Maya, so I have a definite soft-spot for other people's interpretations of these campaigns.

However, it turned out that this was an Incan campaign from the Expanded Americas mod. Well, now my interest was truly piqued! What would such a campaign be like? Would the Inca form a world-girdling empire, able to duke it out with the Europeans on their own turf? Or would they be squashed by European technology?

The Incan start position

The campaign is narrated through an official of the Royal Court who addresses the readers as if they were the Council of Nobles that advise the King. The official stays always within his role, constantly proclaiming the worthiness and good character of the Royal line, and assuring us that they are loved and worshipped by the people of the Empire. The Sun God looms large in all of his descriptions of events, it being assumed to have a hand in the success or failure of all Incan ventures. The attitude of foreigners to the Sun God is a vital factor in determining their moral worth. Here is his opening statement:

Glory to the Sun God, my noble council. It has been many turns of the cycle since I, your faithful servant Huallpa Rimachi, has graced you with a report. For many cycles, your servants have sat on the throne of Jaguar and Jade, wisely heeding your advice in all things. It is my shame to report that our last king died suddenly of a terrible fever and I was not able to inform my council before a new, ambitious man took the crown.

The people of Nuqui have named him King Coatl the Chivalrous and they love the man like no other. Before the temple of the Sun God, he promised to raise our empire to new heights, to spread the word of the powerful Sun God, and to make us rich and powerful. Since that day, you have no doubt heard of this man's exploits, but I shall recount them for my council.

And so to the campaign itself: the new King immediately took steps to expand his small empire, sending his eldest son to subdue the free tribes of South America. After the first battle, it became apparent that the Incan faction is largely identical to the Maya from Kingdoms:Americas, so I had a foreboding that casualties were going to be heavy. Indeed, in that very first battle, the realities of fighting with Native American factions on VH/VH difficulty was immediately brought home to us. Although the settlement was successfully captured, the King's son paid for the victory with his life, the consequence of having an unarmoured infantry bodyguard.

The death of the Prince brought a nice twist to the story however, with King Coatl adopting a new Prince, not of his own blood, to lead the Army. This Prince, Achitometl, went on to complete the subjugation of South America with a string of victories against the local inhabitants, and in the process, adopted several new leaders himself (the adoption mechanism of course being driven by the rapid expansion of Incan holdings).

And now we come to a second twist in the story. With the easy pickings taken, we the readers (in our role as the Council of Nobles) were invited to decide whether to make war upon the mighty Aztecs to the north straight away, or devote some time to building up our rather shallow tech tree first. This was a fine way to get readers to invest in the story, and there was soon a lively debate running, ultimately won by the hawks.

But the war was hardly begun when strangers landed from the sea and attacked the easternmost part of the Incan holdings!

Foreign Devils from beyond the Sea!

A large part of the Army had to turn back to deal with these invaders. They were trapped in the city they had just conquered and defeated in a bloody battle where the deficiencies of the Incan unit-roster began to make itself apparent.

The remaining forces in the west was not strong enough to do more than skirmish against the Aztecs, and success in a few minor actions succeeded only in prompting the Aztec multitudes into launching a full-scale counter-invasion.

Now, I have to tell you that I was not expecting the Aztecs to be a great problem. In Kingdoms:Americas, they are surrounded by enemies and often half-dead before the player even encounters them. I certainly found them easy meat when playing Maya. But in the Expanded Americas mod things are very different; they are a monster faction.

Having caught their tiger by the tail, the Incan armies found themselves locked in a struggle to the death. Forget all those heroic victories you might have dashed off with European armies. The Inca at this stage are vastly inferior in both numbers and quality, and are totally unable to deal with the multitudes of elite Jaguar Warriors the Aztecs can field. In a series of hard-fought defeats, the small Incan elites were chewed up and spat out. Not only did Incan leaders generally fail to survive their first battle, but a swarm of Aztec assassins descended upon the Incan Royal Family like a Biblical plague.

The Incan Capital under threat!

I actually found this description of the eclipse of the Incan Empire quite hard to read. Had I been playing I would have abandoned the campaign as soon as I saw how difficult it was to defeat even small Aztec forces. Nevertheless, Lethe played on grimly until his faction was on the point of extinction. And then he threw open the decision about what to do next to us, the Council of Nobles!

After a spirited discussion amongst the readership, the consensus was that instead of offering to become a vassal, the Inca should undertake a migration, finding somewhere beyond the reach of the Aztecs to establish a new homeland. And so it was that the last two Incan Princes abandoned their remaining settlement and sailed east into the rising sun, looking for greener pastures.

I won't describe what happens at the other end of the migration, but suffice it to say that things don't get a lot easier.

The Inca discover a new world!

This AAR may not be a work of great literature, but it addresses a subject which I find fascinating, especially since it completely sidesteps the normal flow of a Total War campaign. I can't wait to find out whether the Inca have any chance against European armies, and whether the Aztecs will follow them over the Atlantic. If an AAR can invoke that level of interest in me, then I can have no difficulty in recommending it to everyone. Good luck Lethe, and thank you for sharing your campaign with us.

Review by Juvenal

War of Retribution
A Roma Surrectum II AAR by Basiliscus

Spoiler Alert, click show to read:

Story and Introduction
Newcomer AARtist Basiliscus has crafted a story centered around the historical events of the Second Punic War between the superpowers of the age, Rome and Carthage. As this is an AAR based on historical events, there are many rich characters already developed for the writer to choose from. Basiliscus has taken those and used his creative license to script engaging dialogue between them in order to build suspense and draw the reader in.

Now, I will pause the review for a moment of full disclosure. I have a special fondness for this era in Roman history. The Second Punic War is an amazing time in Roman history and well worth the study for those interested in the period. The epic struggle between Hannibal/Carthage and Rome was a turning point in Roman history and set them on the path to empire. That said, let's move on.

Basiliscus is not doing a strict re-telling of the history but changing it to suit the game and the story he wants to build. Therefore, although the characters are by-and-large historically accurate, the sequence of events and who was in charge (particularly on the Roman side) have changed somewhat. This will only bother rabid historians but the average reader will never know the difference.

Basiliscus has focused the AAR (to date) with the events in 216 BC.; primarily the events leading up to and including the Battle of Cannae.

Writing Style and Wording
Basiliscus is not a native English speaker so there are the typical problems with wording and usage to be found for a writer using a second language. That said, the errors are few and only slightly detract from the story. He clearly has a good grasp of the language and his writing is engaging and vivid.

Blood stained the earth beneath him and he let out a groan and looked into his assassin's eyes.
»Welcome to Hades.«, he whispered and pushed Telemas off him.

He released the corpse of the youth off his sword and picked up his helmet. He saw Fabius fight one of his men and picked up a javelin from his saddle. He aimed and released it just as Fabius killed the soldier. The aim was perfect. He struck him with full force and knocked him down of his horse.

Hannibal got up on his own to be seen by his troops and bellowed in his full strength: »Carthaginians! Kill them all!«.

Basiliscus uses a great deal of dialogue and personal interplay to advance the story. The perspective of the story cuts back and forth between the Romans and the Carthaginians focused primarily on dialogue between the Roman leaders/senators and the Carthaginian Hannibal.

The opening chapters are completely text with no images save one or two from outside-game sources. Therefore, the initial build up is heavily dependent on dialogue and Basiliscus does a good job using this to build suspense and develop his characters. Although the wording is sometimes clumsy, it does set the stage for the epic battle of Cannae and lays a foundation for what comes after.

Images and Visual Aids
The pictures of this AAR are good but they are not the strongest part of the AAR. The new mod, Roma Surrectum II, is quite an upgrade in many ways. The soldiers are more historically accurate than the original R:TW and the in-game screen captures look great. Basiliscus does a very good job of cropping the images and staging them for maximum effectiveness.

Battle Images

As there is only one battle depicted in the AAR to this point, there are only a few images to choose from. I expect that as the AAR progresses, the author will use more screen captures.

I will not include this in my review but there is also one rather…disturbing image of some naked Gauls. You will have to check that one out on your own.

Critique and Summary
Basiliscus clearly has a foundation in history and a fondness for the time period. He incorporates some passages recounting incidents from both Greek and Macedonian history as well as the Roman one. His foundation in history comes through clearly although some of his references may be lost to the average reader.

I have already mentioned some of the usage errors in his wording but those are relatively minor. I would, however, like to see Basiliscus work on his format for the story a bit as many of his opening passages appear as the proverbial “wall of text” that can be off-putting at initial glance. Just including some more line breaks would help enormously.

Using historical characters and events in a story is always a two-edged sword. On the one hand, you have a built-in group of people who will be interested in the story. On the other hand, those same people will have a tendency to nitpick you any time you stray from the actual history. So, I commend Basiliscus for treading in these tricky waters. For my part, I really liked his interpretations of the characters and he adds extra elements to move the story along and build suspense (and a few surprises).

Overall, I would say this is an excellent effort and well worth the time to read it.

Review by Skantarios

A Spartan Resurrection
A Roma Surrectum II AAR by Thoas

Spoiler Alert, click show to read:

Introduction
It's been a long time since I last read a Rome: Total War AAR. It has also been along time since I wrote a review or even played Rome: Total War. Therefore, I think it is safe to say that this will be a most refreshing experience! This is an AAR written by Thoas, and it is about Sparta's attempts to "regain their old glory". "Oh dear..." I think as I read this brief introduction provided by the author. Something I have seen countless times in AARs. However, as I scroll down, not expecting much, I am surprised. I am very, very pleasantly surprised. Thoas has laid this AAR out in a very original way. He has presented the story in individual pictures, almost like power-point slides. Here, let me demonstrate:

I know. Doesn't it look professional? After this initial view, let's delve deeper and examine the story.

Story and Writing Style
It is clear Thoas has spent hours researching the background to this story, providing the reader with an excellent history of Sparta, knowledge that will help us understand the story as it progresses. Thus as the story begins, we are able to empathise with the Spartans, and we are truly rooting for them.

In terms of writing style, I have to say I like it. Thoas does not go into great detail, so for those who expect heaps of text, this will not be the AAR for you. However, if you, like myself, dislike the common "They did this... then they did that... etc" style of writing, this AAR will keep you hooked to the screen.

Pictures
Perhaps the best part of an AAR for me, the pictures provided add so much to the story, yet are so easy to get wrong. Fortunately this is not the case here. Helped along by the fantastically detailed units of Roma Surrectum 2, the pictures do look wonderful. It should also be pointed out that Thoas has not committed that oh so easy to commit blasphemy of leaving in the UI, or those little coloured circles around units in the pictures.

Conclusion
Not only are the writing style, story and pictures good, but the AAR has actually been finished! Therefore I would highly recommend this to anyone, it isn't very in-depth or, as long as some, but it's a damn good bit of light reading.

Review by René Artois

Hail Caesar!
An Empire:Total War (DMUC 6.0 mod) AAR by Tim1988

Spoiler Alert, click show to read:

Story and Introduction
Veteran AARtist Tim1988 has crafted a story based in the Italian city-states of the early 18th century. The story is written entirely as a third-person historical narrative as though the story had already happened and we are merely catching up with it as we sit down and read this chapter in a history book.

The story follows the life and times of a young Italian commoner named Amadeo Vasari and his participation in the Italian War of Unification. Young Vasari is heavily influenced by the history of the ancient Roman Empire, particularly that of Julius Caesar (hence the title). Caesar comes to him in dreams and instils a sense of destiny and nationalism. It is the spirit of Caesar that inspires him to join the fledgling Italian army as they attempt to restore unity to the Italian peninsula.

He begins his career as a lieutenant in a regiment of Italian pikemen. Rising swiftly through the ranks based on his initiative and acumen, he soon commands his regiment and then a portion of the main Italian army. He takes the Italian general Enrico Caboto as his mentor and follows him through the early campaigns where he earns both the trust and respect of the commander of the Italian Army.

The story follows the campaigns in northern Italy against the Spanish occupiers and the other minor regional powers such as the Duchy of Savoy.

Writing Style and Wording
As noted before, this story is being told from the perspective of a historian writing a biography of the main character, Amadeo Vasari. Therefore, you will not find any dialogue or other first-person interactions in the story. This allows the AAR to progress at a good pace but does take away some of the flavor that you might find in other formats.

Being written as a historical account, there are many game elements missing from the narrative. This is, I believe, by design and, instead of detracting from the story, is actually a positive as it helps to immerse the reader in the historical account.

There are some wording errors and repetition to be found:

…all the while taking heavy casualties from the heavy guns up on the ridge.

However, these are actually pretty few and far between and it is a compliment to him that there are not more of them.

Tim adds depth to the character by interspersing some excerpts from Vasari’s diary detailing his inner thoughts. These are used somewhat sparingly although, when employed, giving some good insight into the mind and future character of the protagonist.

Tim's battle descriptions are very well done. The writing is concise and provides a good re-telling of the battle. For example:

Whilst this was going on, the Savoyard advance continued, spared the worst of the artillery fire, which was mostly focusing on helping to repulse the cavalry charge. To this extent, the cavalry charge was a success, in that it achieved its objective, but the huge numbers of casualties it resulted in meant that it was nothing more than a Pyrrhic victory, with the following infantry now having to advance over the bodies of their mounted companions.

Images and Visual Aids
The images in the story are where Tim1988 really shines. He has obviously spent a great deal of time culling out pictures that are both meaningful and stirring. He has taken that excellent base of pictures and then put some additional touches on them to make for truly powerful images.

Some of the images are downright grisly but I think that is a welcome change from many of the bloodless screen-shots you find in R:TW and M2:TW battles. War is bloody and killing is messy and the images that Tim uses show this.

Sample Battle Pictures:

He also cuts in enough from both the wide- and close-views to show both what is happening in the larger battle and what is happening on the personal level.

The Wide Angle Shot:

The Mid-Range:

And the Close-up:

On occasion, he sometimes overuses his filters and color corrections but overall the images are very well done and are some of the best I have seen from the Empire and Napolean AARs, especially for land battles.

There are no pictures from outside the game unless you count the first post where he cuts in a few from R:TW as part of a dream sequence. There are also no shots from the game at the strategic level. He may have benefitted from using some extra-game content but the absence does not detract from the story.

Critique and Summary
This AAR is relatively “battle-heavy” and “story-lite.” To some extent, this is to be expected when you are following the life of a soldier but I personally would have liked to see some more context to the life of Vasari aside from a retelling of the battles that he took part in. Tim started out strong in this regard when talking about the inspiration of Caesar on Vasari but that part of the narrative seems to have fallen off sharply with the latest chapters. I am hoping that he will get back to that part as it adds quite a bit to the story and helps with the reader’s sense of involvement in the story.

The story and the pictures are well balanced although Tim does occasionally trend too heavily towards the pictures at the possible expense of the story. There are a few errors in wording and the occasional typo but these are quite minor and to be expected as AARs are, at best, a final draft and not a polished publication.

The narratives of the battles are outstanding. Although the pictures are the real “stars” of that part of the story, the descriptions are concise, but thorough, and well done. I had a fairly easy time discerning what happened and when in the battles. That level of detail is often missing from other AARs but Tim seems to have found the right balance when presenting the battles and is to be commended for it.

The story is engaging but there is a sense of fatality to it. Although Vasari starts as a minor noble, you know he is destined for greatness otherwise there wouldn’t be a history about him nor (as his story tells) pictures of him in action in a museum. Besides more depth to Vasari, I would have also liked to see some other characters introduced or fleshed out in the story. Most of the external characters introduced (outside of Caboto) are the enemy commanders and are quickly killed off. A biography should focus on the main character but there are most likely others that would influence him and their absence is notable.

One rather serious handicap to the story is that there are no maps or strategic views to guide the reader in the direction of the story and the greater political manoeuvrings on the Italian Peninsula. Although the geography of Italy is pretty well-known to most TWC readers, it would still help to have something either from the game or from an external source showing what is going on.

Overall, I enjoyed reading the story of the rise of Vasari. Tim tells it well and it is a believable tale from the beginning. The narrative is engaging and progresses at a good clip. Most of my criticisms are quite minor and probably based more on my personal tastes than what other readers might like.

Tim has shown great care with his story and his level of detail and editing show that he has not sacrificed quality for expediency. Overall, this is a very good AAR and definitely worth the time and effort to read.

The success of this AAR was recently demonstrated with its 3rd Place showing in the latest MAARC. Well deserved!

Review by Skantarios

Shimazu's Story
A Shogun TW AAR by Zarniwoop

Spoiler Alert, click show to read:

Shogun Total War AARs are few and far between on the TWC boards these days, in fact I don't recall any at all recently. So the appearance of this one has filled me with the irresistible urge to indulge my predilection for nostalgia.

You see there is something different about Shogun:TW (and MTW too for that matter). The campaign game, using its Risk-style map, is a greater intellectual challenge than the continuous maps of the more modern games in the series. With a smaller range of possible moves, the campaign AI is much more effective and can put up a good fight. It feels rather like chess as you considering your next set of strategic movements, knowing that a single mistake could place you at a significant disadvantage in the coming battles.

This is something of an Art-house AAR. It is presented as a series of picture panels containing integrated text. I must say that the overall impression is quite professional, the gentle green cloudy background and subtle borders serving to unify text and pictures into a satisfying combination. It reminds me of one of those glossy coffee-table books, something you can enjoy just as much for what it looks like as for the actual details of the story inside.

The Story
Lord Shimazu Takahisa is the Daimyo (chief) of one of the smaller Japanese clans competing for domination in Japan. We launch directly into his invasion of neighbouring Chikugo province, where we watch his army first force its way across a bridge under withering fire from enemy archers, then gather itself and push forward, scattering their foes to take control of the province.

An example of Zarniwoop's technique

The all-conquering Shimazu are soon brought up short when the Imagawa concentrate their forces. But a timely alliance with the neighbouring Takeda clan changes the balance of power and enables the Shimazu to sweep the Imagawa from all their holdings.

With their home island completely secured, the Shimazu look with avaricious eyes to other lands. A substantial force invades Shikoku island, held by a minor clan (the Koni). The move comes not a moment too soon as Mori clan invades the island from the other side. To secure their tenuous foothold, the Shimazu are obliged to tackle the minor clan troops head-on before the Mori take their lands too.

There follows the largest battle of the campaign so far (Shimazu have a full-stack of 16 units). The smaller Koni army of Hosokawa Toratane contains a nasty surprise, elite no-dachi Samuri. It is a race against time to defeat this force before a reinforcing army arrives. Eventually the general himself has to wade in before the stubborn no-dachi break.

After this epic battle, we are treated to the first castle assault of the campaign. In Shogun:TW castles always have an open entrance, so Hosokawa and his few survivors are quickly overwhelmed by the Shimazu, even after their heavy losses in the recent battle.

Celebrations are short-lived however, because the greater task still lies ahead. The island of Shikoku is evenly split between Shimazu and Mori clans. The time has come to face them.

Ready to face the Mori

As you can see in the panel above, Shimazu now boasts a legendary sword master, a single-man unit able to make mincemeat of enemy levies. I must admit that I don't recall such units from my own Shogun campaigns, so I must assume they were added by the Mongol Invasion add-on.

So as not to spoil your enjoyment I shan't describe any more of the campaign, except to say that the next battle is a bridge battle. In Shogun:TW there is only one battlefield for each province, and provinces containing a river will always face the aggressor with a bridge to fight his way across. Unlike RTW and later games, there is no way to avoid this, and river provinces therefore held an especial fear for me when playing my own campaigns.

Conclusion
Introducing his AAR Zarniwoop describes it thus “The format of the AAR will be the same as A Prussian Campaign, but with better spelling”. Well, the spelling is fairly good (although there are a couple of errors), and the tone and level of detail in the prose seem ideal for the format chosen. Zarniwoop's visuals also do a good job of showcasing the sheer beauty of Shogun: Total War, undiminished even after ten years.

I believe this AAR is beginning to build a substantial following, and I would recommend anyone with even a passing interest in Shogun:TW to give it a try. You might just find yourself impelled to dig out a copy and start playing the game yourself!

Review by Juvenal

Historical Fiction Section

Tragedy - A scene from American History
Historical Fiction by Dan the Man

Spoiler Alert, click show to read:

This truly is a tragic review – it’s long overdue! Dan the Man is a budding writer in the HF forum, and here we exhibit his beautiful vignette of a desolated battlefield of the American Civil War.

Dan explores a side that of war that we don’t consider so often. Not the intense road to war, the peak of a glorious charge or the final surrender, but the immediate aftermath of battle. When the guns are silent and the slaughter concluded for the day, how does a man cope with what he’s seen and done?

Here is the HF itself:

Spoiler for The Story:

The acrid smell of gunpowder, blood, and death hung in the air. Dust swirled everywhere, kicked up by the hooves of charging cavalry. The screams of the dying sliced through the din of battle, like the bullets that had caused their pain. The living looked on at the dead with envy as the fight raged on further down the field. Surgeons hopped back and forth, body to body, trying to do what they could to ease the pain of the doomed. Gatling guns could be heard rattling away on the field, round after round spent, man after man shredded before their lightning fast volleys.

A private sat alone amidst this chaos. He was a young man, beardless and boyish of face. He couldn’t have been any older than sixteen. But beyond his chocolate brown eyes, eyes that should’ve held innocence and the joys of youth, lurked the expression of a very old man. He surveyed the battlefield, hardly noticing the gash cut in his side from a close encounter with a Bowie knife. A surgeon approached him from behind, and placed a hand on his thin shoulder.

“Here, let me take a look at that wound.” The doctor said, turning the private around. He didn’t respond, even when the doctor prodded his filthy fingers into the open cut.

“This is going to need some stitches.” He diagnosed, looking up into the private’s face. “Come on back to the surgery tent whenever you’re ready. You’re in no immediate danger.” The private nodded numbly, and turned around to gawk once more at the carnage ahead of him. A single tear traced its way down his dirty face, splashing into a small pool of blood on the ground. Many good men lay here. None of them would ever return home. Their blue and gray uniforms mingled in the places they fell. What did it matter anymore if a northerner sat with a southerner? In their deaths they were free from this wretched field, this wretched war, a war of brother against brother, friend against friend. The private fell to his knees, shouting in anguish at an unforgiving sky, grayed by the smoke of black powder rifles and cannon. He sat there, sobbing. By the time he finally lifted his tearstained face, the sun was setting low over the forested horizon, and the battle was ending, as the “enemy” retreated to the woods.

He rose slowly, tasting the salty tears pouring down his face. He tried to brush the dirt off his pants, to no avail. It didn’t matter any more. He turned and walked back to the camp, leaving the tragedy to his back. The last resounding rumbles of artillery could be heard far off into the distance, coupled with the fading screams of men left for dead. Fallen sabres and bayonets glinted in the red sun of the final twilight hours, leaving a last epitaph to their fallen bearers.

Dan the Man made a good effort with this piece, and I think it shows. I like the way that he touches on the sense of futility that must overwhelm a boy shoved into such a bloodbath. It’s a smooth, clean, and almost poetic read.

What I most appreciate here is that Dan the Man is very descriptive. It’s a relatively short piece but packed with sensory details. From the very beginning we are injected into the battlefield, or what remains of it. At the same time, some details are left alone; the obvious things like the boy’s name, or which side he is on. This supports the theme of futility in the story. The boy really doesn’t know if it matters which side wins, if the devastation will be so horrible either way.

Incidentally though, considering that this boy is sitting down (rather than running away) while Gatling guns (Union technology, although still rare) fire away, combined with his Bowie knife injury (not exactly standard Union issue), indicate that he is in fact a Union soldier.

One the downside, the end rather smacks of melodrama and is a little overdone (shouting in anguish to the sky), but overall this is a commendable piece by Dan the Man, and I for one look forward to more!

Review by Ariovistus Maximus

The Sarissa Sun
Historical Fiction by Katsumoto

Spoiler Alert, click show to read:

Now we have for your viewing pleasure an excellent historical fiction by Katsumoto, a veritable force of nature in the Writer’s Study! But I’ll first let his work speak for itself:

Spoiler for The Story:

Of all the terrible things in this world, I have found war to be the most beautiful.

I have seen men who despised each other become brothers in the midst of battle. I have witnessed boys dubbed cowards and weaklings become heroes and legends, whilst men we cheered as champions fled the field like women. Officers who in training were the sternest bastards alive, I have seen crumble when in the heat of the moment, faces full of fright. Such is the effect of war. You can lie to yourself; you can lie to your brothers and daughters, sisters and sons. Even your comrades you can deceive. But war, no man can fool. It is the Great Revealer. It glances upon your soul and spirit and asks: ‘What are you made of?’ Truth is the only answer it accepts.

I can say that on this side of the River Styx, I have seen it all: monstrosities taller than even the longest sarissa, with feet twice the size of any man’s head. Ferocious sandstorms I have waded through, incapable of even squinting through my grain afflicted eyes. Horizons filled with the foe I have seen, the sight of which sends the most terrifying of chills down one’s spine and halts a man’s limbs as if turned to stone.

I have grown accustomed to death and destruction; blood is a commoner sight than water. I have seen cities razed, their charred exteriors crackling in the dark. Masses I have seen slaughtered, butchered, culled like cattle. Thousands upon thousands have been impaled on the points of our pikes, crushed by our steeds and felled by our javelins. All this and more I have seen and partaken in.

I am a veteran. I have fought the tribes to the north and the Greeks to the south. The myriads of the East I have engaged and defeated in combat with my brothers. The pursuit of war has brought me to the wildest forests and deepest valleys. It has taught me how to live, how to fight and how to survive. Fame and fortune I have garnered from our conquests – never have I allowed it to ruin me. Others broke, spoiled by the riches and vices of the world, lusting for their compatriots’ possessions even though they had everything a man could ever desire. Not me. I would never allow myself to befall such a sordid state.

And that, dear reader, is but the first half of the introduction!As you may have guessed by the title, Katsumoto’s fine offering is the story of a Macedonian phalangite in Alexander’s army.

Katsumoto begins with Axios’ childhood, proceeding efficiently through his enlistment, training, and first blood against the barbarians of Thrace. This is simply an excellent story; it had me riveted from the beginning. Actually I had to tear myself away from reading the end first when something caught my eye.

As per usual with his work, Katsumoto provides a great deal of authenticity and realism. His fascinating insights on the experience of fighting in a phalanx almost have me wondering if he’s not a veteran pezhetairoi himself, and he has built a great set of characters throughout. My personal favorite thusfar is “Ox,” the main character’s superior officer in the training phase, who at first reminded me of Herbert Sobel of Band of Brothers infamy.

His next officer, one whom the fellows call “Balls,” is quite the character as well. But you’ll have to read the story to figure that one out.

All told, this is a fantastic read that I highly recommend. Now, if we all get together and spam his thread…

…we might just convince him to finish the story.

You can read what he’s written thus far in this thread.

Review by Ariovistus Maximus

From the Editor's Desk

So, did you like our issue? If we have introduced you to an AAR you liked, then please do make the effort to post on its thread. AARtists thrive on feedback, and I'm sure your post will be most welcome. The more interest we show in AARs, the more the authors will be encouraged to continue writing. After all, don't we all need the occasional reminder that our efforts are appreciated in order to maintain our impetus?

If any of these reviews have pleased you, then please consider repping my loyal staff: Ariovistus Maximus, SonOfAlexander, René Artois, and Skantarios.

If you'd like to write for the Quill then I want to hear from you. Just drop me a PM. If you don't feel like making a long-term commitment, you can still send me a one-off review, article, or even just something you want to say about AARs. All these things can be found a home in the Quill.

Farewell and happy reading! So, until next time, here are a few words from our sponsors...

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**Katsumoto** · October 19, 2010, 05:38 PM

Good issue fellas, thanks for the review Ariovistus, although I have to say my piece is far inferior when compared to the works of writers such as Rez and Captain Jin, whose stories truly have great characters and vivid tales. I urge everyone to take a peek at one of their stories to see the sublime quality of the writing, which is in my opinion on par with many published works.

**Rex Basiliscus** · October 20, 2010, 02:17 PM

Wow, I'm really humbled by this review. Thank you Skantarios for this positive review of my AAR. I have a deep respect for your work and I hope you will continue yours, which is one of the best I've read so far.
Again, thank you very very much

**Zarniwoop** · October 20, 2010, 02:23 PM

I really wan't expecting this; awesome review. I feel honored even to be mentioned

.

I was also quite a fan of the Empire of Jaguar and Jade; I was sad to see it end.

**Tim1988** · October 21, 2010, 10:33 AM

Another great issue as everyone has come to expect by now.

Thanks to Skantarios for the review of my AAR, Hail Caesar! To be praised by someone as successful as he is really means a lot. The criticisms are all fair, and I will endeavour to improve upon them in future updates to make my AAR as good as possible.

Keep up the good work

**ReD_OcToBeR** · October 22, 2010, 11:08 AM

Thanks for shedding some light on the AAR that I truly poured all my effort and soul into when first stepping into the AAR world. Good to see the ole' Quill still strolling along in good stride. I feel old now lol.

**Lethe** · October 29, 2010, 03:18 PM

Thanks for the review, Juvenal. A literary masterpiece it wasn't, but I did have fun with it and I'm glad that at least a few other people enjoyed following along.

Being a relative newcomer, this is actually the first I've heard of "The Critic's Quill." It's a great idea, and the reviews are an excellent idea. They give some great overviews of the all the different styles of AARs that are available.

Now, I have to go and check out the back issues of the Quill!

**Juvenal** · October 29, 2010, 04:04 PM

Thank you everyone for responding. It gives us all a warm fuzzy feeling inside to know we are doing our bit to support the creative-writing community here at TWC.

In case you're wondering, the Quill is intended to be a monthly publication, and we usually try to produce it a week or so after the Eagle Standard.

If any of you reading this feel enthusiastic enough to create your own reviews then you will find that I am quite willing to accept good work from outside the team. Give it a try, you might even get hooked.