Gosh, obviously I need to comment more since today's chapter blew me out of the water again! Nice to see such a unique aspect of the events during a campaign, and I'm definitely loving the intrigue parts. Keep it up!
Gosh, obviously I need to comment more since today's chapter blew me out of the water again! Nice to see such a unique aspect of the events during a campaign, and I'm definitely loving the intrigue parts. Keep it up!
Chapter XIX: A Merchant's Gamble
Spoiler Alert, click show to read:
Last edited by Thokran; February 02, 2012 at 10:04 PM.
My AAR Collection:
Heaven's Descent, Cyprus Reborn: A Crusader AAR (In Progress)
Accounts From Aragon: A Mediterranean AAR (In Progress) *Reviewed by Skantarios*
The Baltic Terror: A Teutonic Order AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Radzeer*
Visions of an Odyssey: A Makurian Dynasty AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Skantarios*
The Glory of Ostermark: A Call of Warhammer AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Thermal*
The Normal Blood: An English AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Nazgul Killer*
~[Interviewed by Beer Money]
Wooo!! Gilbert is alive!!
Intriguing indeed - and unexpectedly chivalrous of Marcel there, however unintended it may have been![]()
Takeda - a Shogun 2 AAR (Completed) Reviewed by Radzeer
My writing | My art | About me | MAARC | TotW
~~~Under the proud patronage of Radzeer, Rogue Bodemloze. Patron of Noif de Bodemloze and Heiro de Bodemloze~~~
Indeed, Gilbert's return was surprising but welcome!
I have to tell that I sense a shift in your storytelling angle.
Makuria was quite campaign-based, the Teutons were more character-based, but still a lot of campaign, then Aragon was very much character-based with hints about the campaign and now this is almost no campaign! And excellently written in that!If not many questions are asked about the campaign, it means that people are drawn in by the story itself. Very good job!
[AAR] The Wolf Among Dogs - The Latin Empire *In progress* (Reviewed by HeirofAlexander)
[AAR] Primus Inter Pares - The Kievan Rus *Completed* (Reviewed by Thokran)
[AAR] The Chronicle of a Hungarian Freeman *Completed* (Reviewed by la coupe est pleine)
~ The Writers' Study ~ MAARC ~ TotW ~ The Collected Wisdom of AAR Writing ~ My work ~
Following the footsteps of Hesus de bodemloze and bringing Robin de Bodemloze along
@Maltacus: Thanks for the feedback, I really appreciate it. I really enjoy crafting a story out of the agents in the game, because they provide more mobility and opportunity in stories than say a general besieging a neighboring settlement. It also gives me the opportunity to create some interesting characters, like Isabella. She is quite dreadful, isn't she?
@Latin Knight: Thank you! I guess it does play out like a novel as it progresses, I hadn't really thought of it. Then again, I've always been more interested in creating the story aspect of an AAR over the recounting of events part. And yes, poor Marie just never gets a break, does she? Hopefully things won't be all doom and gloom from her from here on out.
@robinzx: Yes, Gilbert's alive and kicking! If all goes well, I have plans for him in the future. As for Marcel, I found it ironic writing out his unintended bit of chivalry in the pursuit of gold. I like his character, so this may not be the last you see of him!
@knin: Glad you're enjoying it! I hope to maintain the quality of the story and make it as riveting as I can as it progresses. Thanks!
@Radzeer: You know, I never really noticed it that way, but I can see it as well. I;m using the campaign less as a strict path to follow and more as a general guideline of sorts. I guess I've slowly just been trying to develop my creative writing skills to the point where one day I won't need a campaign to guide a story. Thanks for pointing that out, and for supporting the AAR!
Also, I've gone and edited the original post, to clarify the difference between the first 1220 section of the AAR, and the current 1400 story. It's more for new readers, but I figured I might as well let it be known now.
My AAR Collection:
Heaven's Descent, Cyprus Reborn: A Crusader AAR (In Progress)
Accounts From Aragon: A Mediterranean AAR (In Progress) *Reviewed by Skantarios*
The Baltic Terror: A Teutonic Order AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Radzeer*
Visions of an Odyssey: A Makurian Dynasty AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Skantarios*
The Glory of Ostermark: A Call of Warhammer AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Thermal*
The Normal Blood: An English AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Nazgul Killer*
~[Interviewed by Beer Money]
Chapter XX: Homeward Bound
Spoiler Alert, click show to read:
Last edited by Thokran; February 04, 2012 at 11:29 AM.
My AAR Collection:
Heaven's Descent, Cyprus Reborn: A Crusader AAR (In Progress)
Accounts From Aragon: A Mediterranean AAR (In Progress) *Reviewed by Skantarios*
The Baltic Terror: A Teutonic Order AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Radzeer*
Visions of an Odyssey: A Makurian Dynasty AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Skantarios*
The Glory of Ostermark: A Call of Warhammer AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Thermal*
The Normal Blood: An English AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Nazgul Killer*
~[Interviewed by Beer Money]
Sublime. I love the way you mould the characters as the story progresses. Much intrigue clearly awaits![]()
Takeda - a Shogun 2 AAR (Completed) Reviewed by Radzeer
My writing | My art | About me | MAARC | TotW
~~~Under the proud patronage of Radzeer, Rogue Bodemloze. Patron of Noif de Bodemloze and Heiro de Bodemloze~~~
Thanks, robinzx. I'm trying to invest an appropriate amount of time developing these characters in accordance with their importance to the overall story. I hope it to be something that develops naturally throughout the AAR's progress.
Anyways, so far I've been able to get updates up every other day or so, but with Superbowl Weekend and some papers to write for Tuesday, I might be a day or two off. Thankfully I've already mapped out what to write, I just need to get around doing it.Thanks again everyone for the support, feedback, and patience; you have no idea how much I appreciate it!
My AAR Collection:
Heaven's Descent, Cyprus Reborn: A Crusader AAR (In Progress)
Accounts From Aragon: A Mediterranean AAR (In Progress) *Reviewed by Skantarios*
The Baltic Terror: A Teutonic Order AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Radzeer*
Visions of an Odyssey: A Makurian Dynasty AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Skantarios*
The Glory of Ostermark: A Call of Warhammer AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Thermal*
The Normal Blood: An English AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Nazgul Killer*
~[Interviewed by Beer Money]
Chapter XXI: The Angevin Plot
Spoiler Alert, click show to read:
Last edited by Thokran; February 08, 2012 at 03:36 PM.
My AAR Collection:
Heaven's Descent, Cyprus Reborn: A Crusader AAR (In Progress)
Accounts From Aragon: A Mediterranean AAR (In Progress) *Reviewed by Skantarios*
The Baltic Terror: A Teutonic Order AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Radzeer*
Visions of an Odyssey: A Makurian Dynasty AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Skantarios*
The Glory of Ostermark: A Call of Warhammer AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Thermal*
The Normal Blood: An English AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Nazgul Killer*
~[Interviewed by Beer Money]
Excellent plot and character development! I also like the pace of the story, slowly rolling on in the eastern Mediterranean... very nice.
But I think one of the greatest elements of this story is the role of Isabella. It is not easy to find a central role for a woman in such stories, so that is a special feat!![]()
[AAR] The Wolf Among Dogs - The Latin Empire *In progress* (Reviewed by HeirofAlexander)
[AAR] Primus Inter Pares - The Kievan Rus *Completed* (Reviewed by Thokran)
[AAR] The Chronicle of a Hungarian Freeman *Completed* (Reviewed by la coupe est pleine)
~ The Writers' Study ~ MAARC ~ TotW ~ The Collected Wisdom of AAR Writing ~ My work ~
Following the footsteps of Hesus de bodemloze and bringing Robin de Bodemloze along
Chapter XXII: Prisonbreak
Spoiler Alert, click show to read:
My AAR Collection:
Heaven's Descent, Cyprus Reborn: A Crusader AAR (In Progress)
Accounts From Aragon: A Mediterranean AAR (In Progress) *Reviewed by Skantarios*
The Baltic Terror: A Teutonic Order AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Radzeer*
Visions of an Odyssey: A Makurian Dynasty AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Skantarios*
The Glory of Ostermark: A Call of Warhammer AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Thermal*
The Normal Blood: An English AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Nazgul Killer*
~[Interviewed by Beer Money]
Wonderfully satisfying after the trials and tribulations of the last few chapters. I loved the sudden turn in Marie's character, as well as Philip's moment of aggression![]()
Takeda - a Shogun 2 AAR (Completed) Reviewed by Radzeer
My writing | My art | About me | MAARC | TotW
~~~Under the proud patronage of Radzeer, Rogue Bodemloze. Patron of Noif de Bodemloze and Heiro de Bodemloze~~~
That's more like it, princess.
Spoiler Alert, click show to read:
Last edited by Maltacus; February 10, 2012 at 10:10 AM.
Read, and add to, Maltacus guide to field battles!
Zhidislavs Battle, a Battle AAR seen from the generals point of view - Completed.
I Hate Late Era Bodyguards, a Battle AAR - Completed
A Diabolical AAR - Completed
Home to Midgard, a Third Age AAR about two dwarves, a spy and a diplomat - updated 6/4.
Reviewed by Boustrophedon in The Critics Quill
Third Age Unit Cards Minimod
Inspired by Maltacus, here is my representation of Princess Marie:
Spoiler Alert, click show to read:
Eventually upon Thokran's consent to be....
Spoiler Alert, click show to read:
![]()
Last edited by Robin de Bodemloze; February 10, 2012 at 12:49 PM.
Takeda - a Shogun 2 AAR (Completed) Reviewed by Radzeer
My writing | My art | About me | MAARC | TotW
~~~Under the proud patronage of Radzeer, Rogue Bodemloze. Patron of Noif de Bodemloze and Heiro de Bodemloze~~~
Thanks Radzeer, I didn't expect Isabella to be such a central figure, but she turned out quite nicely. Hopefully I can give Marie some equal female empowerment. It's nice writing from a female perspective at times, it's not one that's often seen. Same thing with Philip; even priests need to let out some energy sometimes!
robinzx and Maltacus, those portraits were awesome! You guys have to show me how to do that, lmao. Might actually turn out useful in the later parts of the story.
Thanks again for the support, and I'm glad you're enjoying the story!![]()
My AAR Collection:
Heaven's Descent, Cyprus Reborn: A Crusader AAR (In Progress)
Accounts From Aragon: A Mediterranean AAR (In Progress) *Reviewed by Skantarios*
The Baltic Terror: A Teutonic Order AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Radzeer*
Visions of an Odyssey: A Makurian Dynasty AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Skantarios*
The Glory of Ostermark: A Call of Warhammer AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Thermal*
The Normal Blood: An English AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Nazgul Killer*
~[Interviewed by Beer Money]
Chapter XXIII: On the Run
Spoiler Alert, click show to read:
Last edited by Thokran; February 12, 2012 at 11:06 AM.
My AAR Collection:
Heaven's Descent, Cyprus Reborn: A Crusader AAR (In Progress)
Accounts From Aragon: A Mediterranean AAR (In Progress) *Reviewed by Skantarios*
The Baltic Terror: A Teutonic Order AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Radzeer*
Visions of an Odyssey: A Makurian Dynasty AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Skantarios*
The Glory of Ostermark: A Call of Warhammer AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Thermal*
The Normal Blood: An English AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Nazgul Killer*
~[Interviewed by Beer Money]
Great update as always! I thought the tension between Gilbert and Marie was very well done.
And then he took an arrow to the knee.![]()
Takeda - a Shogun 2 AAR (Completed) Reviewed by Radzeer
My writing | My art | About me | MAARC | TotW
~~~Under the proud patronage of Radzeer, Rogue Bodemloze. Patron of Noif de Bodemloze and Heiro de Bodemloze~~~
An Aragonese hideous princess... So, from the previous descriptions I gather that she probably is said to have shining eyes and the softest of silk hair among the people of her own court? But alas, when the writer is from the more shallow and less understanding Crusader States such qualities are sadly overlooked...
Spoiler Alert, click show to read:
Your adventuring party are really hardcore diplomats. Nobody even contemplates retreating home to Cyprus for a while. Keep writing your very entertaining story
Oh yes, about the princess card (WHY is it that your stories seem to end up in, and result in, obsession with princesses as soon as you pick Mediterranean factions? The "jewels of the Meditteranean", indeed): It's actually nothing grander than simple copy-pasting of a line and some stars from one of your other pics. It looks like robinzx pasted individual letters to form the hitherto unknown trait Master Swordswoman. I use GIMP for picture editing, if that matters. If you would want to have many (existing) traits it can be really worth it to mod a princess or whatever with those in the descr_strat - it is much easier to copy a longer list of traits than pick one from each of several pictures and get the same good result.
If you really overdo this kind of thing it can end up as something like this:
Spoiler Alert, click show to read:
Last edited by Maltacus; February 12, 2012 at 05:29 PM.
Read, and add to, Maltacus guide to field battles!
Zhidislavs Battle, a Battle AAR seen from the generals point of view - Completed.
I Hate Late Era Bodyguards, a Battle AAR - Completed
A Diabolical AAR - Completed
Home to Midgard, a Third Age AAR about two dwarves, a spy and a diplomat - updated 6/4.
Reviewed by Boustrophedon in The Critics Quill
Third Age Unit Cards Minimod
Another excellent chapter! The escape was masterfully written, and the last scene with Gilbert on the boat did really capture the feeling of it. I like the sky pic you added - and actually I have to say that while I am usually not a great fan of out-of-game pics, the plot-heavy way how you write this makes their inclusion very smooth (and of course you pick the right pictures too).
[AAR] The Wolf Among Dogs - The Latin Empire *In progress* (Reviewed by HeirofAlexander)
[AAR] Primus Inter Pares - The Kievan Rus *Completed* (Reviewed by Thokran)
[AAR] The Chronicle of a Hungarian Freeman *Completed* (Reviewed by la coupe est pleine)
~ The Writers' Study ~ MAARC ~ TotW ~ The Collected Wisdom of AAR Writing ~ My work ~
Following the footsteps of Hesus de bodemloze and bringing Robin de Bodemloze along
@robinzx: Thanks, I'm happy to see that the interplay with Gilbert and Marie is shwoing through. Also, I was wondering what kind of reaction I'd get from the Skyrim pun.
@Maltacus: lmao, what can I say? The Aragonese have a wierd sense of beauty, either that or the Cypriots are just uncouth bastard who can't appreciate the aesthetic value of Aragonese beauty. I guess you can say the group's pretty hardcore, but what I'm trying to aim for in these next few posts is that 'home' is a commodity that they've taken for granted, and that the term 'home' becomes very subjective to perspective.
Thanks for the tip btw, I might have to try GIMP out and see if I can learn to use it effectively, might turn out useful later on.(And yes, I guess I have an obsession with all these jewels of the mediterranean
. In reality, I'm just trying to offer different perspective from the usual male perspective. It just so happens all these female actors tend to be princesses so far, and that too can be redundant. Thankfully, given the plot-heavy nature of the story, not every female perspective has to be a from a princess. Hopefully that shows through in later parts.
@Radzeer: Thanks! I wasn'tsure how that last chapter was going to play out, given that there was so many changes of scenery in such rapid succession. Also, thanks for the nod on the out-of-game pics. I'mnormally not a fan of them, but given the limits of my computer's graphics, I also know I can't rely on stunning visual battles all the time, as they woiuldn't mesh well with the story. I hope that these pictures so far have been able to serve their purpose in setting the mood/setting/environment/etc for the story.
Anyways, school has me a bit sidetracked, but hopefully I should have an update in baye later on tonight, or tomorrow. Thanks again!
My AAR Collection:
Heaven's Descent, Cyprus Reborn: A Crusader AAR (In Progress)
Accounts From Aragon: A Mediterranean AAR (In Progress) *Reviewed by Skantarios*
The Baltic Terror: A Teutonic Order AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Radzeer*
Visions of an Odyssey: A Makurian Dynasty AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Skantarios*
The Glory of Ostermark: A Call of Warhammer AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Thermal*
The Normal Blood: An English AAR (Complete) *Reviewed by Nazgul Killer*
~[Interviewed by Beer Money]
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