Tale of the Week 3 - The Winner

[Aldgarkalaughskel]

Dear Ponti,

Your experiment has entered and won the third series of the ToTW. I really enjoyed all tales, but it seems that yours prevailed. Well done.

Truly,

PeeWee

P.S. If somehow Confederate Jeb manages to explain how he took that shot, I will explain how I made the shot for ToTW 5.

All points will be registered on the Leaderboard right after the results of the III. MAARC.

Dear Mary,

The king's experiment is entering it's fourth week as he attempts to discover the elixir of life. I am honored to be his test subject. Yes, that is why I am in the front line. Everyone else should die, but if this elixir is the right recipe, I should be oblivious to both sling and arrow. It's strange, but it seems that drinking this potion composed of 100% unadulterated mercury has morphed the tone and physical state of my skin. I am no longer a solid, but a liquid. The other pilgrims make fun of me, and say that I am the devil's son. I'm not sure how much more of their bullying I can handle. Even brother James has been making completely idiotic statements such as "Look at John, the big Drip!" It's not even remotely funny, it's just ridiculous. I attempted to hang myself, and I'll just say that being made of liquid is very limiting. The other pilgrims get to perform self flagellation to show their devotion to Jesus and the cause, but I can't. I don't bleed. I just cry molten Gallium.

If somehow the Mongols do capture me and separate my particles, tell the children that their father died defending them, but tell them not what happened to me. They have enough to worry about, like not dying of plague.

Truly,

Martin

P.S. Enclosed is a lock of my hair. Well, actually it's more like a lock of hair infested with bubonic carrying lice and ticks. The best of luck to you. If somehow I don't die in battle, I will probably die on the return journey.

[TheTrueGreek]

gj pontifex, i wonder who the other 2 guys who voted for me were?

[Pontifex Maximus]

Hey, cool! Thanks everyone that voted for me and for the record, all the stories were quite good.

[TheTrueGreek]

yah, i was kindve surprised that you and Caradog went a far more serious rout than i did, but i enjoyed the premise of all of the tales

p.s. this is great as for my aar, i have 5 battles to detail and i only have the victory screens, so making a tale for each battle will be interesting and this is great practice for it