Total War Center Forums - Personal Help and Advice http://www.twcenter.net/forums/ Post personal problems that you want to discuss here. No spam or negativity allowed. en Sat, 25 May 2013 16:19:18 GMT vBulletin 60 http://www.twcenter.net/forums/images/y2skin/misc/rss.png Total War Center Forums - Personal Help and Advice http://www.twcenter.net/forums/ What to do? http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?601801-What-to-do&goto=newpost Thu, 23 May 2013 20:51:45 GMT Basically to sum things up here * See this pretty girl quite often * Go... Basically to sum things up here

  • See this pretty girl quite often
  • Go up to her one day, talk & introduce myself
  • Get her number
  • We start talking & texting a lot
  • Fall "in love" with her, which is driving me insane
  • About to ask her to go to the movies with me
  • Before I could, I find out she has a boyfriend already & has been with him for awhile


So I'm not sure what to do from here on out. For starters I can't find the time of day where I haven't been thinking about her which is really irritating And I don't want to try and involve myself in their relationship because I for one wouldn't want another man to do that to me. But I don't want to distance myself from her, I want to get closer if anything & get to the point of her liking me but not to the point of breaking up with her current boyfriend. I also don't want to play the waiting game with this to see when or if they break up. I already asked others for advice & this was their advice I do not kid...

The Advice
Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 


Basically they think I should attempt to "steal her" from him...

Although my story goes a bit deeper than explained due to the summarizing, what would the members of the twcenter community do in my situation?

And one last thing, I don't usually get this kind of feeling for other girls so I feel as if this one could be special as I could see it all working out in the long run.

Right now I was thinking of maybe Saturday asking her to go see Hangover Part 3 with me this Sunday.

Thanks in advance everyone! ]]> Personal Help and Advice Blackwolf http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?601801-What-to-do Working as sailor http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?601615-Working-as-sailor&goto=newpost Wed, 22 May 2013 02:36:58 GMT Has anyone here ever worked as a sailor (not navy/military sailor), if yes,... Has anyone here ever worked as a sailor (not navy/military sailor), if yes, where?

I was wondering if it's good, I heard the pay is good and you get to see many harbour cities in the world, is it true? ]]> Personal Help and Advice Sir Brian de Bois-Guilbert http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?601615-Working-as-sailor Crushed by work and exams. http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?601486-Crushed-by-work-and-exams&goto=newpost Tue, 21 May 2013 02:00:01 GMT Am I the only one here who is currently being crushed by an enormous, sheer... Am I the only one here who is currently being crushed by an enormous, sheer endless amount of work and stuff to learn for exams?

How do you deal with such situations?

I currently keep promissing myself that I will buy myself a new pc as soon as I am through this, which kind of keeps me going.





PS: Also I have this really stupid medical condition, when under servere stress my throat starts to swell. ]]> Personal Help and Advice The Germans are coming http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?601486-Crushed-by-work-and-exams How do YOU talk to girls. http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?601338-How-do-YOU-talk-to-girls&goto=newpost Mon, 20 May 2013 01:07:23 GMT So I'm 15, freshman in high-school. I got home schooled because I was annoyed by a lot of people in my school. Anyways, just about everyday I think to myself and say I hope I don't turn out to be that guy that sleeps in his mom's basement and spends the day looking at "dirty magazines" to get his satisfaction instead of going out and talking to girls. I was just wondering how do you guys "break the ice" with the females. I think about it a lot and I try and plan out a situation but I can never find out how to start a conversation. I feel like I'm going to run out of words to say and we'll just sit there staring at each other :laughter:..... SO yeah thats pretty much it, any ideas/advice? ]]> Personal Help and Advice Rebel_Caesar http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?601338-How-do-YOU-talk-to-girls Rough week or two http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?601161-Rough-week-or-two&goto=newpost Sat, 18 May 2013 17:17:22 GMT I'm not in too bad of shape but it's been a rough week or two for me. In less than 7 days, in different ways, I managed to mess up two very close friendships / relationships with two female friends I care very deeply for, and also hurt my reputation among my friends and peers while doing so. I'd rather not get into the details, and while the damage isn't irreversible (I think we'll all be fine eventually), it's one of those things where the second my mind wanders from whatever it is I'm doing, I remember what I did and just feel (deservedly) quite awful.

Generally, I'm a somewhat socially anxious person; I care a good deal about what people think of me. Consequently, I've been laying around the past few days, doing little but watching movie after movie, crushing Xanax, and sleeping a lot more than usual.

Anyone have any tips for things to do when you're feeling down and need to keep your mind off things? Or strategies for (at least somewhat) alleviating anxiety and guilt? I know this is all very vague and general, but I figured getting my thoughts off my chest and chatting with some strangers surely couldn't make me feel any worse. ]]> Personal Help and Advice BeastG33 http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?601161-Rough-week-or-two Cubic Zirconium; the most loathsome stone in existance? http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?600782-Cubic-Zirconium-the-most-loathsome-stone-in-existance&goto=newpost Wed, 15 May 2013 16:59:58 GMT I'm out the other day and came across a jewelry store that had some cool looking earrings. I think my girlfriend would like them so I decide to get them for her. It's not her birthday, anniversary, or even a holiday. I'm getting them just because I thought she would like them. The lady says that they are CZ (cubic zirconium), and I don't know anything about jewelry so I say that's fine, I think they look really cool and she will like them. I surprise her with them later that day and tell her they are cubic zirconium and immediately I knew something was wrong. She said she liked them, but the expression on her face was as if I'd just handed her a bag of dead cats. She tells her friends about the earing's and they start berating me about it and calling me a "cheap bastard" for not getting diamonds, not that I can afford diamonds anyway. Even her parents are taking shots at me now and everyone thinks I'm a bad boyfriend. I had no idea there was such a stigma attached to CZ, I was just trying to do something nice. Apparently it would have been better not to have gotten anything at all. Do I deserve all of this or is everyone just being unfair? ]]> Personal Help and Advice Old_Scratch http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?600782-Cubic-Zirconium-the-most-loathsome-stone-in-existance Just realized I am depressed http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?600719-Just-realized-I-am-depressed&goto=newpost Wed, 15 May 2013 06:54:40 GMT I have not had a job or anything at all for at least 6 months, or more. Before... I have not had a job or anything at all for at least 6 months, or more. Before that I failed a course and quit college. Before that I barely started a course but quit it. I am going nowhere in life and I was constantly being sucked into a hole that drained the life out of me. I am sick of it, there is no way to end it but to move, and to work out. I write this as advice to anyone else who can't get up in the morning because they feel tired all the time, who can't bother to call friends and see what they're doing but instead would rather sit at home and stare into a computer screen mindlessly gaming or reading random ****. Is this going to take us anywhere?

I am prepared to finally kick the negativity off my back, and no more excuses to allow myself to do this any longer. I am also writing this thread as a pledge where I can at least know I wrote something down that forces me to remember that, I did in fact make this promise to myself. And I hate breaking my word.

Where I was going was not good, I recognize this. But looking back, thinking about problems/issues, reminiscing past events, procrastinating everything and distancing myself from my friends, all these things are destroying my life and have been for a long time. I do see it now, and I just didn't want to admit it to myself.

**** the negativity, I will appreciate any response and advice.. and to hear what you guys have done to battle your way out of the dark pit that envelops and distorts reality. If this were to continue and become worse, I would not be surprised if the far worse case scenario is some kind of psychosis where I become completely self-centered and shut down completely. I sometimes wonder if depression is related to psychosis.

This seems to have to become some sort of a battle against negative ****, in all its formats. And I also have to battle against zombie activities like sitting, staring at my computer screen when I could be doing better things. I don't know how hard it's gonna get, or if it's going to work, but I need to kill the weights that have been enveloping me for a year. Good luck to anyone who has been dealing with the same situation, because this is way harder than I would have thought. ]]> Personal Help and Advice Nutsack http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?600719-Just-realized-I-am-depressed Bar soap vs. Liquid soap? http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?600550-Bar-soap-vs-Liquid-soap&goto=newpost Mon, 13 May 2013 23:47:41 GMT Been considering changing my usual soap, a DOVE bar soap, to a liquid soap.... Been considering changing my usual soap, a DOVE bar soap, to a liquid soap. Though I'm not entirely sure what the benefits of liquid soap vs. bar soap are and so far no one's had a clear answer for me. Can anyone tell me the pros and cons of both these two soap types? ]]> Personal Help and Advice Basileus of Byzantium http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?600550-Bar-soap-vs-Liquid-soap Undergrad wondering about Honorsociety.org http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?600413-Undergrad-wondering-about-Honorsociety-org&goto=newpost Mon, 13 May 2013 06:33:40 GMT Hey, so today in one of my TA classes an undergrad asked me about... Hey, so today in one of my TA classes an undergrad asked me about honorsociety.org and they apparently had gotten invited to them. I know about a few different honor societies which I'm apart of but I have no idea if this is real or not. She told me it could be a scam so she wanted my opinion and I told her I'd look into it.

Looking on google however there's almost zero information about this group. It seems odd to me that they wouldn't simply mail the letter to her but then again new age. There's several people complaining it's a scam because it costs money but all of my honor societies cost money too. So I've found endlessly mixed messages about it. Does anyone know how to look up some tangible information on this? I've told her to check with her adviser but appt's for advisers are two months out right now so some sort of answer would be better and it would be cool if I could give her a specific answer on it.

At worst it costs 50$.
She has a 3.87 GPA, is a student senator and active on her campus in a variety of things but I really couldn't tell.
http://www.achsnatl.org/standards_alert.asp
Looking at this I'm suspicious but I know of several others which are legitimate which don't qualify by these standards either so I'm at a loss. ]]> Personal Help and Advice elfdude http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?600413-Undergrad-wondering-about-Honorsociety-org Undergrad wondering about Honorsociety.org http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?600412-Undergrad-wondering-about-Honorsociety-org&goto=newpost Mon, 13 May 2013 06:30:21 GMT Hey, so today in one of my TA classes an undergrad asked me about... Hey, so today in one of my TA classes an undergrad asked me about honorsociety.org and they apparently had gotten invited to them. I know about a few different honor societies which I'm apart of but I have no idea if this is real or not. She told me it could be a scam so she wanted my opinion and I told her I'd look into it.

Looking on google however there's almost zero information about this group. It seems odd to me that they wouldn't simply mail the letter to her but then again new age. There's several people complaining it's a scam because it costs money but all of my honor societies cost money too. So I've found endlessly mixed messages about it. Does anyone know how to look up some tangible information on this? I've told her to check with her adviser but appt's for advisers are two months out right now so some sort of answer would be better and it would be cool if I could give her a specific answer on it.

At worst it costs 50$. She has a 3.87 GPA ]]> Personal Help and Advice elfdude http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?600412-Undergrad-wondering-about-Honorsociety-org Anxiety and worry http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?599603-Anxiety-and-worry&goto=newpost Tue, 07 May 2013 17:16:09 GMT Well I have a small issue.My son is old enough to play on the street with... Well I have a small issue.My son is old enough to play on the street with friends.Yes I watch him.But when I cant see him or he is in school I worry about him.When he comes home I ask how he got on etc.I get these horrible worry butterflies in my chest like stress over him sometimes.If any body hurt him I would be afraid I would kill some body.How can I let go and not worry and get stressed and just chill the hell out a bit more.:doh: ]]> Personal Help and Advice Tom Cruise HAWK http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?599603-Anxiety-and-worry Learn Mathematic http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?599558-Learn-Mathematic&goto=newpost Tue, 07 May 2013 09:53:10 GMT Hello everyone, i was an middle school student (currently in second years). as... Hello everyone, i was an middle school student (currently in second years). as you know, i have a poor grades in math. not because I never learned math, but every time i studied about math i can't understand things like formulas,etc even if i try hard. Also every time the math teacher explains about it. it just like that the information enter my right ear and out from the left ear

because of my grades, my parents has been called by the teacher for countless times!!! of course this is sadden both me and my parents, and every time i explains " i already studied!!! " they just give this responses " dont lie to us,you just sit in front of your computer all day ". they never know if i use internet to learn math

so,any advice to learn & understand math effectively?
also,sorry for my very very bad english. :tongue: ]]> Personal Help and Advice Satrio Eko http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?599558-Learn-Mathematic Going bald http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?599402-Going-bald&goto=newpost Sun, 05 May 2013 20:00:42 GMT Hi, im 19 years old. And i'v started balding. It's not too bad yet, but i guess in a year or two. Most of my hair will be gone :(

Yesterday, i decided to cut it all of. I don't know what to think, in some way i kind of like it. I look good with it, and people didn't laugh and such when they saw me. But it also feels bad, because i know that i will probably never have any hair again. These next few years will be the last time that i have my normal hair still, after that it's gone for good :(

At first i didn't take it to hard, i mean. It's just hair? And im still nice and healthy, with a new look :) I even look more intimidating :D But it sucks to loose your hair as a 19 year old, and i have no real idea as to what caused it. Anybody else who is balding, or already is bald? ]]> Personal Help and Advice Mortarion http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?599402-Going-bald <![CDATA["Showing Submission"]]> http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?599397-quot-Showing-Submission-quot&goto=newpost Sun, 05 May 2013 19:42:13 GMT The girl I sit next to in Calculus, (by mutual choice of seats,) is sort of... The girl I sit next to in Calculus, (by mutual choice of seats,) is sort of touchy-feely. She doesn't do anything in an overtly sexual manner, but I will often find her putting her hand on my leg, my shoulder, my upper back. A few times she's touched my neck below the chin, ran her hand through my hair etc. At lunch last week she held my hand. In Calculus she asked me to massage hers...

I've known her for almost a year now, we text now and then, and from my perspective it seems like we're just friends. But this behavior began and has continued to become more extreme in the last month or so.

Every time she makes one of these gestures my male friend, (who sits behind us in Calculus, and across from us at lunch,) will try to pull her away, pull me away, or convince me that I need to resist her advances, because they are "signs of submission." Not going to lie, I enjoy the attention, but is allowing her to touch me truly "a sign of submission?" Is it turning in my man card, like my friend is trying to say? Is he just jealous? I know for a fact that he thinks she's attractive, and that he had had a crush on her two years before.

Secondly, if I am showing submission, does it matter as long as I am not being controlled?
I haven't gone out of my way to do anything extensive for her.

Its true that almost all contact by between us is initiated by her, because I have legitimate qualms with touching a girl in any way at all if she's dating another guy. When she has touched me, I have repeatedly communicated that I did not know why she was doing it, that I thought it was weird. Eventually I just decided to take it, and try not to show that I liked the attention.

And this is the part where my self esteem starts to drop dramatically. In our High School the administration recognizes the top ten students in regard to GPA. Recently she passed me, making herself number ten and myself number eleven. This girl is not competitive at all. She didn't even know how the ranking system worked or what her standing was until I walked her over to the office to get a transcript. Is she attempting to distract me? I find this extremely difficult to believe, because she's just not competitive in that sense. She's quite literally just a duty-fulfiller, and getting A's has been her bottom line level of performance. I find it difficult to believe but I haven't ruled out the possibility.

TLDR:

This girl more or less flirts with me by touching me in math and at lunch. My friend says that accepting the contact is showing submission. I think it possible that he might just be jealous. I cannot tell if I am being played, or by whom. I want to take this to friends at school, but I am unsure if this will make me come across as a pig, especially amongst my other female friends. ]]> Personal Help and Advice Arvedui01 http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?599397-quot-Showing-Submission-quot Opening beer with eye socket http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?599351-Opening-beer-with-eye-socket&goto=newpost Sun, 05 May 2013 12:38:35 GMT Who here can do this properly? I'm trying to learn this, but I just end up bruising the areas around my eye. So what exactly are the details behind it?

My friend manages to slightly open the beer cap so you hear the swooshing sound as the gas escapes and thus trick people into thinking he opened it. I can do that too, but it's much harder to actually twist the cap off, which is the ultimate trick.

EDIT: You don't use the eye as something to dig the bottle cap into, you use the muscles around it to keep it still while you twist the bottle. So there's no danger to the eye what-so-ever if done properly. ]]> Personal Help and Advice Nikitn http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?599351-Opening-beer-with-eye-socket